Adoptions FAQ

Question:

I think its great that David takes the time to post these to the newsgroup.  If you were a new searcher, wouldn’t you appreciate it?

Response:

I think its great that David takes the time to post these to the newsgroup. If you were a new searcher, wouldn’t you appreciate it?

If I were just starting a search and  were  naive enough to believe that posting a message on Usenet was the same thing as signing up with  a real registry I might appreciate it. Then  I would feel betrayed when I finally realized that what I  thought was an application for a registry  was in reality a short lived message that no one could find after a few months. What about someone who is searching for that person ten years from now?   This data needs to be stored in a permanent useable data base, not distributed over a broadcast system that was not designed to work as a data base and has no long term storage capacity.

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – <snip Umm.. Sue, I think you might be a tad confused. Who is Don??? Do you mean David Gray at WWR, by chance? If so, he doesn’t have a financial motive for the WWR postings here…he provides his service/registry for free. If you weren’t speaking of David, then whom did you have in mind? Regards, Beth You’re correct.  I used the wrong name.  I meant David Gray. Thanks for pointing out my mistake. Do you know David personally?  If not, how can you attest to his lack of financial motive?  What do you think of all that self-promoting and/or aggrandizing at the bottom of each and every post?  What’s the ratio of search content to David content?                                                              Sue T.

Go to the World Wide Registry page:         http://www.phoenix.net/~aquarian/davids/birth.html There is a lot of "David" content. Everything relating to the adoption issue is personal to me. I gave-up a child for adoption, and I have an adopted daughter. So let’s get something straight. I like money. I have lots of projects, some commercial, and some not. I am proud of my projects. I could have designed the registry differently around a corporate model like the International Soundex Reunion Registry. The problem here is that "soundex search algorithm" doesn’t work very well in this application and the older registries are very people intensive, ..ie expensive to operate. I decided to use the newer technology. I spent a year evolving a robot (computer program) to manage the information flow. Incoming information is scanned for over fifty key words or ideas. Search requests are checked against the Registry’s database (which is now over 13,000) and a report is constructed and sent electronically. The information is then redirected to other registries and search groups around the planet (go to the birth page above for a list) and there is a secret section containing many of the search "tricks" that professional searchers use (mostly contributed by the Pro’s). People get access to this section after they register. With this technology, one person and a robot can do what an entire building full of people could accomplish under the conventional corporate model. At first I limited the Registry to Texas, but I kept getting registrations from all over the planet, so, I decided to change the name and put-on a bigger harddisk (1.6 Gig). Concerning financial motives: Once the information is turned loose, , ie.. you will note that our postings contain the email address of the adoptee, birth mom, etc… there is no-way to collect money, even if the World Wide Registry were so inclined. But, there is a another component of this, "people helping themselves". I tried to design the World Wide Registry around the concept of Self-Help providing the tools and information delivery system so those touched by adoption can accomplish their goal. … David *____    ___                     |      /   |    | |     /   |____/  ___/   http://www.phoenix.net/~aquarian/davids/tree.html Weighted Asset Model of Real Estate Appraisal   Real Estate Investment Software, Reinvest (shareware)           My special fondness for the I.R.S. ~Net/DownLoad Manager – Software Legal Searcher – Software David’s Secrets of Yo-Yo’s     477-LIVE, Homes for Rent in Austin, TX   World Wide Registry matching Adoptees with BirthParents The Transformational Portal Download Autosponder Lite – Software Central Texas Real Estate For Sale (Free) MailGuard, the Junk-Mail Pollution Solution – Software

Response:

<snip "Send the flames…we have thick skins!  You can’t run us off!" Has this become a "macho" thing for you?                    Sue T. Hey Sue…it is not necessary to send us personal email and post the same message on the NG  (unless you just want to)  It is double effort for you and for us… Just a suggestion!

Actually, it’s done as a courtesy. Your server most likely does not get every message posted. Sue was making sure that you didn’t miss her post regarding you. My news reader is set up to automatically cc: the person I’m responding to, so it’s no extra effort. Just some information! – Don — "Don’t let the bad things in life ruin the good" – Don Williams

Response:

<snip "Send the flames…we have thick skins!  You can’t run us off!"

Has this become a "macho" thing for you?                    Sue T.

Response:

I have been programming. The new format is on-line. 1. The messages are now redirected to alt.adoption.issues 2. The hearers are posted here. ….. David *____    ___                     |      /   |    | |     /   |____/  ___/   http://www.phoenix.net/~aquarian/davids/tree.html Weighted Asset Model of Real Estate Appraisal   Real Estate Investment Software, Reinvest (shareware)           My special fondness for the I.R.S. ~Net/DownLoad Manager – Software Legal Searcher – Software David’s Secrets of Yo-Yo’s     477-LIVE, Homes for Rent in Austin, TX   World Wide Registry matching Adoptees with BirthParents The Transformational Portal Download Autosponder Lite – Software Central Texas Real Estate For Sale (Free) MailGuard, the Junk-Mail Pollution Solution – Software

Response:

<snip "Send the flames…we have thick skins!  You can’t run us off!" Has this become a "macho" thing for you?                    Sue T.

We have decided that we will respond to every post that has something to do with us or our industry and any post that blatently attacks someone for the sheer delight of attacking…. Unlike you Sue, we will only respond to post that have something to do with us … not every post on the NG… Keep it coming…we love this stuff… I’m everybit as macho as any of you guys! Terri — Marc and Terri Hibbs Crane and Hibbs Investigations State License: A-1875

Response:

<snip "Send the flames…we have thick skins!  You can’t run us off!" Has this become a "macho" thing for you?                    Sue T.

Hey Sue…it is not necessary to send us personal email and post the same message on the NG  (unless you just want to)  It is double effort for you and for us… Just a suggestion! — Marc and Terri Hibbs Crane and Hibbs Investigations State License: A-1875 "Flame us! We love it!  You can’t run us off!"

Response:

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Here is an idea. 1. We set-up a group called alt.adoption.searching 2. I post the header in alt.adoption in the following format:   SE: 1967/03/04 USA MO Kansas City ….World Wide Registry 3. The body of the email is comprised of one line. Something to the effect of:   Go to alt.adoption.searching for more informaion.   4. Then the full post goes to alt.adoption.searching This will require some programming on my part and somebody need to know how to set-up a new group. …David T. Gray (World Wide Registry)

Dear David, I just wanted to let you know that I really appreciate your willingness to compromise and work with those of us who are unhappy about the volume of your World Wide Registry posts. Actually, I seldom post to this newsgroup and when I do it’s invariable done to give voice to the fact that my patience is being tried; however, your generous efforts combined with your good-natured sense of cooperation have prompted me to break the mold and actually say something positive.  :-)  I might add that I have just downloaded yet another 500 search messages from you (and still dread the possibility that 13,000-20,000 of these could appear in total) and I’m still feeling benevolent–this speaks volumes.   If I had any computer skills at all I would gladly help you put this compromise effort in place as quickly as possible, but since I don’t and can’t I’ll just end this with thanks and good wishes. Nancy "Well if you think I am going to stand for this lying down, you had better think again!"    Celeste  12/30/96

Response:

Here is an idea. 1. We set-up a group called alt.adoption.searching 2. I post the header in alt.adoption in the following format:    SE: 1967/03/04 USA MO Kansas City ….World Wide Registry 3. The body of the email is comprised of one line. Something to the effect of:    Go to alt.adoption.searching for more informaion.   4. Then the full post goes to alt.adoption.searching This will require some programming on my part and somebody need to know how to set-up a new group. …David T. Gray (World Wide Registry) *____    ___                     |      /   |    | |     /   |____/  ___/   http://www.phoenix.net/~aquarian/davids/tree.html Weighted Asset Model of Real Estate Appraisal   Real Estate Investment Software, Reinvest (shareware)     My special fondness for the I.R.S. ~Net/DownLoad Manager – Software Legal Searcher – Software David’s Secrets of Yo-Yo’s     477-LIVE, Homes for Rent in Austin, TX   World Wide Registry matching Adoptees with BirthParents The Transformational Portal Download Autosponder Lite – Software Central Texas Real Estate For Sale (Free) MailGuard, the Junk-Mail Pollution Solution – Software

Response:

You’re correct.  I used the wrong name.  I meant David Gray. Thanks for pointing out my mistake. Do you know David personally?

No, I don’t know David personally. If not, how can you attest to his lack of financial motive?

I can attest to it from the fact that David’s registry is FREE! What do you think of all that self-promoting and/or aggrandizing at the bottom of each and every post?  What’s the ratio of search content to David content?  

You mean his signature file? I think it is no worse than lets say… the folks at Bastard Nation using signature files and titles etc. If you are inferring that David’s signature file is blatant advertising then I would have to laugh in your face. Nowhere in David’s sig does he say… "Hey, come buy this gizmo…only 19.95" (unlike some people who post here…)   Ratio?  I have no idea. Beth

Response:

Here is an idea. 1. We set-up a group called alt.adoption.searching 2. I post the header in alt.adoption in the following format:    SE: 1967/03/04 USA MO Kansas City ….World Wide Registry {snip}

David… don’t cave in to a select few who have forgotten what it was like to search…of course it will be difficult to find anyione willing to give up their time and expense to set up a new newsgroup! — Marc and Terri Hibbs Crane and Hibbs Investigations State License: A-1875 "Send the flames…we have thick skins!  You can’t run us off!"

Response:

You seem to be serving as a cheerleader or booster for David and his WWR. To answer your question, I would be much happier if the ISRR were doing this.

Sue, I agree. Then I wouldn’t have to-do-it. Or maybe – you do-it? DownLoad my Robot from the Web Site, it’s called AutoSponder, It operates the entire World Wide Registry. I’ll send you the registration codes and help you get online. Or someone I didn’t had a financial motive …          Sue T.

Your right, I suspect ISRR makes a good living off contributions. …Regards… David (WWR) I think its great that David takes the time to post these to the newsgroup.  If you were a new searcher, wouldn’t you appreciate it?

– *____    ___                     |      /   |    | |     /   |____/  ___/   http://www.phoenix.net/~aquarian/davids/tree.html Weighted Asset Model of Real Estate Appraisal   Real Estate Investment Software, Reinvest (shareware)           My special fondness for the I.R.S. ~Net/DownLoad Manager – Software Legal Searcher – Software David’s Secrets of Yo-Yo’s     477-LIVE, Homes for Rent in Austin, TX   World Wide Registry matching Adoptees with BirthParents The Transformational Portal Download Autosponder Lite – Software Central Texas Real Estate For Sale (Free) MailGuard, the Junk-Mail Pollution Solution – Software

Response:

[courtesy copy of original note posted to: alt.adoption] References: Here is an idea. 1. We set-up a group called alt.adoption.searching

Excellent idea. I vote yes. I suggest the name: alt.adoption.search 2. I post the header in alt.adoption in the following format:    SE: 1967/03/04 USA MO Kansas City ….World Wide Registry 3. The body of the email is comprised of one line. Something to the effect of:    Go to alt.adoption.searching for more informaion.  

NO. You will be defeating the purpose of suggestion number one. Then you will have TWO newsgroups filled with registry posts. 4. Then the full post goes to alt.adoption.searching

As it should be. The newsgroups is designed for search and registry posts ONLY and will free up alt.adoption for discussion as was its original intent. We do not encourage advertising (commercial) nor binaries, why should we encourage page after page of registry entries which ARE available at your website? A number of months ago soc.adoption.adoptees was up in arms over the posting of the AOL registry search posts. Today I do not see them on that ng but I have no idea how they solved the problem. Of course, soc.a.a IS a moderated ng…we certainly don’t need that! – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – This will require some programming on my part and somebody need to know how to set-up a new group. …David T. Gray (World Wide Registry) *____    ___                       |      /   |    | |     /     |____/  ___/   http://www.phoenix.net/~aquarian/davids/tree.html Weighted Asset Model of Real Estate Appraisal   Real Estate Investment Software, Reinvest (shareware)     My special fondness for the I.R.S. ~Net/DownLoad Manager – Software Legal Searcher – Software David’s Secrets of Yo-Yo’s     477-LIVE, Homes for Rent in Austin, TX   World Wide Registry matching Adoptees with BirthParents The Transformational Portal Download Autosponder Lite – Software Central Texas Real Estate For Sale (Free) MailGuard, the Junk-Mail Pollution Solution – Software <<<<<

Ha! This entry of yours in your "sig(?) line(s)" is truly an oxymoron when compared with the HUNDREDS of registry posts you have posted to alt.adoption! Many see it as polution! Just as an aside, David, could you educate me concering the "safe-guards" you have built-in to this registry of yours. What kind of protection do you offer your registrants against intrusion from someone who doesn’t give a rat’s ass about search, but simply wants to harrass them. A recent incident of a sick individual who contacted a birth mother and arranged for a "reunion" is enought to scare the hell out of all of us in the search and reunion end of this. That is why I will ALWAYS offer 1000% support to International Soundex Reunion Registry because it is handled in a professional manner with safe-guards for all invloved. In our sometime haste to find and reunite we fail to see the wisdom in taking things more slowly and learning as we go. In that respect, the speed and availability of information is quite possibly going to be our Waterloo. Patty B… ISRR=Int’l Soundex Reunion Registry  http://www.plumsite.com/isrr/ *Don’t miss:  http://www.openadoption.org/               http://www.AdoptiveFam.org               http://www.bastards.org/ "For some reason we don’t yet understand, we seem incapable of empathizing with other humans in the abstract. We need to have them represented to us before we can imagine what it might be like to share their feelings and their dreams".    "Life As We Know It" — Michael Berube, Prof. of Lit.                               University of Illinois

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Ya know this was a private email to you….how come I see it here on alt.adoption?  I thought everyone here was much against the posting of private email to a group…. You missed the whole point. David’s  Website IS  the appropriate place to run a registry.   Usenet is not. There is a difference. Obviously you have not visited David’s website.  It is usually best to know what you are talking about before "speaking."

He did this to me too. I have stopped answering this emails. …David (World Wide Registry) *____    ___                     |      /   |    | |     /   |____/  ___/   http://www.phoenix.net/~aquarian/davids/tree.html Weighted Asset Model of Real Estate Appraisal   Real Estate Investment Software, Reinvest (shareware)           My special fondness for the I.R.S. ~Net/DownLoad Manager – Software Legal Searcher – Software David’s Secrets of Yo-Yo’s     477-LIVE, Homes for Rent in Austin, TX   World Wide Registry matching Adoptees with BirthParents The Transformational Portal Download Autosponder Lite – Software Central Texas Real Estate For Sale (Free) MailGuard, the Junk-Mail Pollution Solution – Software

Response:

I should not have commented on the WWR until I went to the site. I did not realize that David was the same person who for years has been helping folks in TX with searches.  David is a reunited bdad.  I have contacted him several times for assistance and TX advice and he was always quick to get back in touch with me. Never any mention of money. I was hearing that he is charging for this service, but, after looking his page over, it appears he does not charge. I now question my own reaction to these posts. I see from his web page..that he does forward all this information to other places such as AOL , PARR…to name a few. I know from what he is saying that he would like to forward to ISRR..but has not been able to. I have two suggestions. 1.  David, please put something on your page encouraging folks to also register with ISRR. I think that ISRR should be promoted by EVERYONE involved in adoption search and support as a FIRST step in search.  After registering with ISRR..then by all means, register with WWR, ALMA, Birthquest…..whatever else you want to do…but ISRR first. If we could all agree to promote ISRR first and foremost…we would have even more ISRR reunions. 2.  Try to figure out a better way to publish the info on alt.adoption.   There must be something that everyone could live with….well… okay…comments??? deer DeerWatson http://www.teleplex.net/deer Bastard Nation Founding Foundling I do not reveal family matters to lunatics.   S.White 11-13-96

Response:

Ya know this was a private email to you….how come I see it here on alt.adoption?  I thought everyone here was much against the posting of private email to a group…. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – You missed the whole point. David’s  Website IS  the appropriate place to run a registry.   Usenet is not. There is a difference. Obviously you have not visited David’s website.  It is usually best to know what you are talking about before "speaking."

Response:

I think its great that David takes the time to post these to the newsgroup. If you were a new searcher, wouldn’t you appreciate it? If I were just starting a search and  were  naive enough to believe that posting a message on Usenet was the same thing as signing up with  a real registry I might appreciate it.

The World Wide Registry currently maintains such a database, currently we have about 13,000 registrations, some of which are posted here. This data needs to be stored in a permanent useable data base, not distributed over a broadcast system that was not designed to work as a data base and has no long term storage capacity.

Why not do-it both ways if it furthers the common goal. It is true that Usenet and the concept of the NewsGroup, has it’s origins deriving from the day’s of the 300 baud modem. The coming of the World Wide Web was unanticipated. The possibility that everyone on the planet might be plugged-in was unanticipated. I beleive there are several Usenet archives on the planet? But more than that Deja-News, and other new-commers, now, archive the postings, and allow free searching using their powerful search engines. Someday in the far future you will be able to search a 10 or 100 years worth of postings. …Regards… David — *____    ___                     |      /   |    | |     /   |____/  ___/   http://www.phoenix.net/~aquarian/davids/tree.html Weighted Asset Model of Real Estate Appraisal   Real Estate Investment Software, Reinvest (shareware)           My special fondness for the I.R.S. ~Net/DownLoad Manager – Software Legal Searcher – Software David’s Secrets of Yo-Yo’s     477-LIVE, Homes for Rent in Austin, TX   World Wide Registry matching Adoptees with BirthParents The Transformational Portal Download Autosponder Lite – Software Central Texas Real Estate For Sale (Free) MailGuard, the Junk-Mail Pollution Solution – Software

Response:

<snip Umm.. Sue, I think you might be a tad confused. Who is Don??? Do you mean David Gray at WWR, by chance? If so, he doesn’t have a financial motive for the WWR postings here…he provides his service/registry for free. If you weren’t speaking of David, then whom did you have in mind? Regards, Beth You’re correct.  I used the wrong name.  I meant David Gray.

Thanks for pointing out my mistake. Do you know David personally?  If not, how can you attest to his lack of financial motive?  What do you think of all that self-promoting and/or aggrandizing at the bottom of each and every post?  What’s the ratio of search content to David content?   To me, utilizing the WWR is more than a little like accepting a contact veto as an interim step.  I don’t think it’s likely to happen that way.   There are any number of possible scenarios, and no I shan’t enumerate them, which could hamstring other persons and/or groups which have long established registries and have a proven track record of REALLY being altruistic.  I get more than a little angry with each and every "johnny-come-lately" who has discovered adoption as a way to line their pockets.  And I get more than a little perturbed when I see one fast buck artist promoting another.  You can be assured that I’m likely to speak out on the subject OFTEN when I notice it.  (Same thing with Marcy whom I notice is now peddling her "wares" only on the alt.adoption.agency ng.)                                                                Sue T.

Response:

You missed the whole point. David’s  Website IS  the appropriate place to run a registry.   Usenet is not. There is a difference. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Obviously you have not visited David’s website.  It is usually best to know what you are talking about before "speaking."

Response:

You seem to be serving as a cheerleader or booster for Don and his WWR. To answer your question, I would be much happier if the ISRR were doing this.  Or someone I didn’t had a financial motive …          Sue T. I think its great that David takes the time to post these to the newsgroup.  If you were a new searcher, wouldn’t you appreciate it?

Umm.. Sue, I think you might be a tad confused. Who is Don??? Do you mean David Gray at WWR, by chance? If so, he doesn’t have a financial motive for the WWR postings here…he provides his service/registry for free. If you weren’t speaking of David, then whom did you have in mind? Regards, Beth

Response:

I think its great that David takes the time to post these to the newsgroup. If you were a new searcher, wouldn’t you appreciate it?

AMEN!!!  Well said Ellen…. he does this for FREE to help alot  of people!!  HIT THE DELETE BUTTON!!!  if you don’t want them!!! Alana

Response:

You seem to be serving as a cheerleader or booster for Don and his WWR. To answer your question, I would be much happier if the ISRR were doing this.  Or someone I didn’t had a financial motive …          Sue T. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I think its great that David takes the time to post these to the newsgroup.  If you were a new searcher, wouldn’t you appreciate it?

Response:

I think its great that David takes the time to post these to the newsgroup. If you were a new searcher, wouldn’t you appreciate it?

If I were just starting a search and  were  naive enough to believe that posting a message on Usenet was the same thing as signing up with  a real registry I might appreciate it. Then  I would feel betrayed when I finally realized that what I  thought was an application with a registry  was in reality a short lived mesage that no one could find after a few months. What about someone who is searching for that person ten years from now?   This data needs to be stored in a permanant useable data base, not distributed over a broadcast system that was not designd to work as a data base and has no long term storage capacity.

Response: