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Question:

Adoptees should not have the right to know who their birth parents are. They should have the right to their medical history. No more! The rights of adoptees stop where the rights of birth parents begin. Jean-Pierre Gauthier

And where would that be? Nevermind, I know. And FYI I am one of those mothers. I do not buy into the c*** that my rights conflict with my son’s. The stupid laws of secrecy posit it that way, not me or my son. Secrecy laws support the shame and blame experienced so heavily by some mothers and it’s time that we get rid of the "problem". If you really care about us, and somehow I doubt it that you really do, do you really think that supporting secrecy (that enables and continues the shame) is helping us? This is hardly even thinking outside of the box. Karen

Response:

Hi Karen, – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Here’s what’s been happening. Bill 183 was introduced on March 29th by the Liberal government. It was a far from perfect bill (contact veto & fine, against our advice & lobbying), but it was the first bill ever introduced by a government. The government has a majority so we knew that it would likely pass – or so we thought. THEN, to everyone’s surprise, the IPC began her vigorous, over-the-top lobbying campaign against the bill. See http://www.ipc.on.ca/scripts/index_.asp?action=31&P_ID=16185&N_ID=1&P…. She even got ten privacy commissioners across the country to support her publically. The media took up her cause and rode on the fear factor that she was her platform. People actually, it seemed, began to fear the bill. The fight took place in the media and we were only able to get very little coverage. We wrote op-eds, articles, and many letters. No one was listening to us, except the government which is very subject to public opinion. The public was fed and accepted the spectre of the fearful, cowering woman who needed "protection" and the IPC was seen as a hero for standing up for her. For months we have been trying to talk to the IPC but she refused to answer our mail or accept a meeting. She just kept spewing out her press releases, relentlessly.

With respect, I’ve seen quite a few press releases from COAR as well. Indeed, I read about the HR complaint on the Ottawa Citizen site yesterday before the IPC issued their response. The COAR press release was at the start of this thread also. BEFORE the IPC put out their press release. The bill passed second reading with only twelve of the opposition saying "nay". Twelve men.

Are you suggesting this is some kind of vast male conspiracy. Are the votes of these twelve MPs somehow worth less because they are men? Sounds like discrimination on the basis of sex to me! Still very little press for us.

Wait – don’t tell me; perhaps it’s a vast male and media conspiracy! Perhaps all these conservative media barons are birth parents who want to hide their past!. This could be true I guess; but it sounds hysterical! 16 adopted people decided that the right to know was their human right, not just a privilege to be meted out to government. The HR case may not make hay in an HR tibunal, but it sure got the media to listen to us. I actually think it is a human right and so does the UN, not that our federal government cares, but it is a case.

Understand – nobody has had their rights taken away.  These 16 people didn’t have this right last year, they didn’t have this right last month. Nothing has changed since Ann Cavoukian did her job and provided her counsel to the legislature. That’s why this is wrong.  (Well – it’s also wrong on Freedom of expression grounds, as well as probably not creating an inequality on a simple reading of the OHRC as well as a couple of other reasons.) That’s the way it works here. Privacy commissioners are strong and getting stronger. They seem to have a huge influence on laws, yet they are not elected. What’s worse is that this will affect open records across the country, so the fight here is pivotal. There are three provinces with disclosure vetoes and the advocates in those places would love to get rid of them (like Western Australia did just this month).

And a whole bunch of other people see a problem with that. Get over it – or at least learn to disagree without the name caling. (It hurts your argument, which I was beginning to start to understand). PHT

Response:

snip – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Here’s what’s been happening. Bill 183 was introduced on March 29th by the Liberal government. It was a far from perfect bill (contact veto & fine, against our advice & lobbying), but it was the first bill ever introduced by a government. The government has a majority so we knew that it would likely pass – or so we thought. THEN, to everyone’s surprise, the IPC began her vigorous, over-the-top lobbying campaign against the bill. See http://www.ipc.on.ca/scripts/index_.asp?action=31&P_ID=16185&N_ID=1&P…. She even got ten privacy commissioners across the country to support her publically. The media took up her cause and rode on the fear factor that she was her platform. People actually, it seemed, began to fear the bill. The fight took place in the media and we were only able to get very little coverage. We wrote op-eds, articles, and many letters. No one was listening to us, except the government which is very subject to public opinion. The public was fed and accepted the spectre of the fearful, cowering woman who needed "protection" and the IPC was seen as a hero for standing up for her. For months we have been trying to talk to the IPC but she refused to answer our mail or accept a meeting. She just kept spewing out her press releases, relentlessly. The bill passed second reading with only twelve of the opposition saying "nay". Twelve men. The bill went to committee and some of the dirty dozen filibustered until the bill was held over until the fall. Still very little press for us. 16 adopted people decided that the right to know was their human right, not just a privilege to be meted out to government. The HR case may not make hay in an HR tibunal, but it sure got the media to listen to us

I understand the frustration in not being able to get media attention to counteract the IPC.  I was disheartened by all the media reports slamming the bill and accepting the IPC’s criticism–especially when I find her analysis to be so utterly facile and, out and out, wrong. Moreover, I am aware of the old adage that any press is good press–it’s just that, in this case, the press that these complaints will generate is going to hurt your cause.  Presumably, the goal is to try to sway public opinion in favour of opening records retroactively, without a disclosure (or contact?) veto.  How are these complaints going to help do that?  Hell, I support your cause, disagree vehemently with the IPC’s comments and, yet, I’m distinctly unimpressed with these complaints.  I can only imagine the thoughts of someone who agrees with the IPC. To the extent that this is about selling a message, think about what these complaints have done.  The IPC is being lauded for standing up for the "fearful, cowering woman who needs protection" (to use your phrase).  Now, she can add to that the spectre that the adoption lobby is trying to coerce her into silence by launching frivolous legal proceedings. I actually think it is a human right and so does the UN, not that our federal government cares, but it is a case.

Perhaps it is a case.  It’s just not a very good one.  In fact, it’s a pretty bad one.  And one that, incidentally, won’t be resolved for years unless a settlement is reached(the OHRC is notoriously slow and has a huge backlog).  All of which poses a problem for your cause.  If you had a slam dunk case, that would be one thing.  As it is, it just looks like sour grapes. That’s the way it works here. Privacy commissioners are strong and getting stronger. They seem to have a huge influence on laws, yet they are not elected.

Lots of people who aren’t elected have a huge influence on laws–that’s not news.  What was news was that a provincial government in Canada was prepared to open adoption records retroactively.  It was prepared to do so without a disclosure veto (albeit, with a contact veto).  It was resisting vocal opposition from an independent officer of the legislature to include a disclosure veto.  All of which was newsworthy within the Canadian context. Maybe I’ve misunderstood your motives.  If you were out to scuttle the bill in its entirety because of the existence of the contact veto (I think Marley has elsewhere suggested that was her ideal–I could be wrong on that) then you may yet be successful.  Who knows? I’m finding the whole process pretty ugly and devoid of common sense on both sides.  I guess that’s why I try to avoid partisan politics. Tom

Response:

Personally, I’d not have filed a suit.  There are other, more fun ways, to to handle people like her and run her out of business personall.

See, THAT’S how you do it  :-) And why in the world do the nanny socialists up there have a "privacy" commissioner to start with?

See my other response to you. Canada has become very Euro-like in their goverance. Nanny socialism is the modus operandi. steve

Response:

I don’t think what you’ve been following what’s going on there.

That’s never stopped me before  :-) But I have been following here on alt.a In 30 years of this crap I’ve never seen so much hate spewed against adopted persons as came from her. If’ she’d talked that way about racial or religious minorities she’d have been booted out at once.   According to her, adoptees are  liars, stalkers, killers, and responsible for honor  killings.

She’s a moron. No question there. The bill in question, Bill 183 is a government bill (brought by the government, not any adoptee rights group)  which permitted records access to adoptees and bparents, which was a big mistake.  Though I personally not only support records access for bparents, but for the general public (records should be open for anybody) this is a huge legislative mistake that has scuttled more than one access bill.  BN opposed it due to it’s contact veto and $50,000 fine.  Cavoukian has gutted the bill.  Nobody wants it now.

That’s what I gathered, and why I say that (in Canada) one goes to one’s parliament and fights. She has also caused extreme harm to records access bill throughout North America, where adopted persons can now be seen as a "suspect class"–not in the legal sense, but the moral sense. Cavoukian  has some serious problem with adoption in general and adopted persons in particular.  Her long prepared statement is really odd.  She hasn’t even read the complaint, yet she (or her flunky press person) issued a public rebuttal.  That’s just not done.  It’s usually "no comment."  So what’s up with that?  Maybe she has a little secret back in Armenia.

Like I said, filing a complaint against an HR Commissioner is a bad idea. OF COURSE she’s going to respond right away — no way she can let that sit. And she did, and she’ll circle her wagons. It’s been my observation that one has to be a certain type of person to want the job of "Human Rights Commissioner" in the first place — liberal weenie with a HUGE stick up one’s butt — so it’s no surprise to me that she responds with such vehemence. The point is, now the open records crowd is SOL in trying to get anything done in Ontario. You don’t get legislation passed by antagonizing people. That’s something BN & Co. should have learned by now. See: Alabama for the right way. steve

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi Marley: I don’t disagree with you in some respects. I can tell you I have serious concerns about Patriot Act, CAPPS II, etc. – they are still in my mind privacy violations, at least in their use of retrospective data – albeit with the blessing of statute. For me, I understand the benefits of having open records – indeed, even public records  (in Ontario where I am – only a subset of authorized persons can request birth certificates).  I am perfectly happy to have open records on a going forward basis. Where I run into a sticky patch is the subject of retroactivity. While I think it’s well settled (I’m not sure how much you know about the circumstances here) in Ontario there was no statutory basis for the promises of anonymity/confidentiality – it certainly seems that these were given (properly or improperly) to many birth parents by social workers and children’s aid workers.

Such promises are never binding. It would be like a worker at the assessors office promising you that your property tax will never increase. What these adoption professionals did was promise something they had no business promising. At heart, statutes are not promises, and statements that imply that a statute is a promise are misrepresentations. You and your colleagues raise some interesting questions (such as whether a birth parent has a right of anonymity from their own child – given the prescence of all (at least one birth parent, possibly two – and the child) at the birth).  I’ll be honest and tell you I haven’t completed my thinking on this.  It represents a conflict.

I don’t know on what basis birthparents may argue that they have a special right to anonymity. There is nothing inherent in adoption to render birthparenthood a special category or class, too many birthmothers are not anonymous, too many adoptions are successfully rendered without it. Anyone from a neighbor, a relative, a friend or acquaintance may know that Ms. X was pregnant, gave birth, and relinquished. Are all of these third parties bound under the alleged right of the birthmother to anonymity? What I’ve yet to see in the Ontario discussion is the fact that birth is both a private and a public act. While I’m very happy with open records on a going forward basis. I’m not ready to disregard the promises made to birth parents in the past. Quite honestly, I don’t think the public policy benefit to mandatory disclosure for the 3-4% that may file a disclosure veto outweights the public policy benefit of the state (or the state’s representative) keeping their promise.

Since the state couldn’t legitimately make the promise and its representatives could only do so by misrepresenting the statutory nature of adoption, then the state isn’t bound by the promise. Period. One thing that is troubling to me, at least in the Ontario context – is the language and imputation of motive that is being spread around by the activist community. While I can understand the emotion, I suppose – I don’t think its helpful to finding a solution. We may disagree on the interpretation, and even the paramouncy of rights – but we should be able to discuss it without name calling.

Couvakian has acted as an advocate for the most reactionary position against open records. Far from bringing reasoned judgement to the debate, she has used an extremely biased and hysterical rhetoric and graced it with the imprimatuer of her office. At least I know now how to oppose a bill I don’t like, I’ll anonymously threaten to kill myself and no legislator can resist my arguments. Sheesh. Ron – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – PHT Privacy does not exist in the United States where it is construed as keeping the state out of the personal business of it’s citizens.  Take a look at Griswold.  I know you’re from up north, but ever hear of the Patriot Act, Homeland Security,  Real ID, TSA?  The state can do anything it wants, can snoop on anybody it wants, doesn’t need search warrants any more in some cases, basically monitors what we do. Oh, and it can see what books you took out of the library, just in case Osama, who you’re hiding in your home, gets a hankering to read Barbara Cartland.  Ideally, for me, the state shouldn’t even issue birth certificates, death certificaets, marriages licences, etc. But as long as they do, it’s in the pubic record, at least here. (A lot of people however do confuse secrecy for privacy, so you’re not alone). I’ve been in this racket for 30 years,  Hiding somebody’s public birth record means that the over-arching nanny state protects the secrets of individuals.   I don’t know how anybody can live in  Socialist Canada–except to escape the National Socialist US.  My birth father who is 77 and lives in Amherst  keeps talking about moving to St. Catherines to get away from Bush. Marley

Response:

Hi Marley: I don’t disagree with you in some respects. I can tell you I have serious concerns about Patriot Act, CAPPS II, etc. – they are still in my mind privacy violations, at least in their use of retrospective data – albeit with the blessing of statute. For me, I understand the benefits of having open records – indeed, even public records  (in Ontario where I am – only a subset of authorized persons can request birth certificates).  I am perfectly happy to have open records on a going forward basis. Where I run into a sticky patch is the subject of retroactivity. While I think it’s well settled (I’m not sure how much you know about the circumstances here) in Ontario there was no statutory basis for the promises of anonymity/confidentiality – it certainly seems that these were given (properly or improperly) to many birth parents by social workers and children’s aid workers. You and your colleagues raise some interesting questions (such as whether a birth parent has a right of anonymity from their own child – given the prescence of all (at least one birth parent, possibly two – and the child) at the birth).  I’ll be honest and tell you I haven’t completed my thinking on this.  It represents a conflict. While I’m very happy with open records on a going forward basis. I’m not ready to disregard the promises made to birth parents in the past. Quite honestly, I don’t think the public policy benefit to mandatory disclosure for the 3-4% that may file a disclosure veto outweights the public policy benefit of the state (or the state’s representative) keeping their promise. One thing that is troubling to me, at least in the Ontario context – is the language and imputation of motive that is being spread around by the activist community. While I can understand the emotion, I suppose – I don’t think its helpful to finding a solution. We may disagree on the interpretation, and even the paramouncy of rights – but we should be able to discuss it without name calling. PHT – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Privacy does not exist in the United States where it is construed as keeping the state out of the personal business of it’s citizens.  Take a look at Griswold.  I know you’re from up north, but ever hear of the Patriot Act, Homeland Security,  Real ID, TSA?  The state can do anything it wants, can snoop on anybody it wants, doesn’t need search warrants any more in some cases, basically monitors what we do. Oh, and it can see what books you took out of the library, just in case Osama, who you’re hiding in your home, gets a hankering to read Barbara Cartland.  Ideally, for me, the state shouldn’t even issue birth certificates, death certificaets, marriages licences, etc. But as long as they do, it’s in the pubic record, at least here. (A lot of people however do confuse secrecy for privacy, so you’re not alone). I’ve been in this racket for 30 years,  Hiding somebody’s public birth record means that the over-arching nanny state protects the secrets of individuals.   I don’t know how anybody can live in  Socialist Canada–except to escape the National Socialist US.  My birth father who is 77 and lives in Amherst  keeps talking about moving to St. Catherines to get away from Bush. Marley

Response:

Adoptees should not have the right to know who their birth parents are. They should have the right to their medical history. No more! The rights of adoptees stop where the rights of birth parents begin. Jean-Pierre Gauthier

This issue is burdened with enough simple-minded slogans, Jean-Pierre. Care to define for us where these rights begin and end, and why, in your opinion? What exactly are the "rights of birth parents" in your view? The "rights of adoptees"? Does an adoptee have the right to know of the existence of a brother, sister, uncle, aunt, grandparent, or parent who did not consent to adoption or does not want his relationship concealed? How do you reconcile the rights of a birth parent who wants disclosure and one who does not?  Will you gag the one to protect the other? J.

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Unlike Dr. Kervokain’s description of adoptees as stalkers, liars and murderers.  There’s names for people like her, but no doubt if I used them here somebody would forward them to her. This just isn’t true – if you read what’s in the public record she didn’t say this at all! The only name calling and bitterness I’ve seen is from those who don’t seem to like her. I don’t find that particularly helpful at all – it dimishes the open records argument. Personally, I’d not have filed a suit.  There are other, more fun ways, to to handle people like her and run her out of business personall.  And why in the world do the nanny socialists up there have a "privacy" commissioner to start with?  There is no such thing as privacy.  Only secrets. it’s unfortunate that your life experiences have jaded your view in this way. Privacy does exist – it’s important as a social good. (A lot of people however do confuse secrecy for privacy, so you’re not alone).

Care to explain the difference to those of us too dim to understand, Peter? A birth parent may reasonably argue that their decision to relinquish a child for adoption not be a matter of public record, available to all. But the birth of that child and the names of those responsible for that birth?  Why, when these facts are available to all for all others? Does anyone really think that anyone other than someone with a direct interest in the matter is likely to search the public record to determine whether a person gave birth to a child not in evidence?  The only reason for insisting on that, so far as I can see, is to conceal the fact and avoid embarrassment or shame, at the expense of severing the child’s links to not only the parent but every other person to whom that child may be biologically related.  Rightly or not, these are considered important links in both our cultures and have been for centuries. It also seems to me that nothing but our thoughts is ever truly private.  Once an event is known to a single other person, one cannot legitimately expect that fact to remain forever secret.  If one later chooses to conceal the fact of a child’s birth and relinquishment from a spouse or after-born children, that is not a question of privacy but of secrecy, the conscious concealment of information which we know may affect the lives of not only ourselves but of others, if revealed.  It is the potential impact on others that distingusihes the private from the secret, IMO.  Government may legitimately protect privacy, matters of invidual conscience; it has no leigitimate role in the keeping of personal secrets. J.

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sixteen adoptees have filed human rights complaints with the Ontario Human Rights Commission against Ann Cavoukian, Information and Privacy Commissioner in Ontario. They are alleging that the privacy commissioner intended to incite the infringement of the right to equal treatment because of family status – they are adopted. This is contrary to section 13 (1) of the Ontario Human Rights Code. Dumb, dumb, dumb. This is not the way you get open records. I don’t know the legal system in Canada, but I bet it’s highly unlikely a HR Commission will slap a government official who is, after all, exercising one of the duties of his office. And now you’ve pissed him off, and will undoubtedly pissed off a number of MPs. It’s a club, remember? Y’all have a hearing going on about how clubby the Liberals are, in fact, if you need a reminder. This is more of the liberal-weenie nanny-state approach to problem-solving, and it won’t work — not in Canada and not in the U.S. You want open records? Go into your parliament and fight for them. Indeed, I too was astounded when I read the original post.  The complaint likely has little merit–and strategically, it makes adoptees look like a bunch of whiners who are trying to intimidate (through the use of bogus legal proceedings) those who oppose the Bill. To put it bluntly, it’s the equivalent of a child throwing a tantrum when he doesn’t get his way–which I wouldn’t have thought is exactly the image you want to convey when trying to open records retroactively. Tom Unlike Dr. Kervokain’s description of adoptees as stalkers, liars and murderers.  There’s names for people like her, but no doubt if I used them here somebody would forward them to her.  Personally, I’d not have filed a suit.  There are other, more fun ways, to to handle people like her and run her out of business personall.  And why in the world do the nanny socialists up there have a "privacy" commissioner to start with?  There is no such thing as privacy.  Only secrets. Marley

Here’s what’s been happening. Bill 183 was introduced on March 29th by the Liberal government. It was a far from perfect bill (contact veto & fine, against our advice & lobbying), but it was the first bill ever introduced by a government. The government has a majority so we knew that it would likely pass – or so we thought. THEN, to everyone’s surprise, the IPC began her vigorous, over-the-top lobbying campaign against the bill. See http://www.ipc.on.ca/scripts/index_.asp?action=31&P_ID=16185&N_ID=1&P…. She even got ten privacy commissioners across the country to support her publically. The media took up her cause and rode on the fear factor that she was her platform. People actually, it seemed, began to fear the bill. The fight took place in the media and we were only able to get very little coverage. We wrote op-eds, articles, and many letters. No one was listening to us, except the government which is very subject to public opinion. The public was fed and accepted the spectre of the fearful, cowering woman who needed "protection" and the IPC was seen as a hero for standing up for her. For months we have been trying to talk to the IPC but she refused to answer our mail or accept a meeting. She just kept spewing out her press releases, relentlessly. The bill passed second reading with only twelve of the opposition saying "nay". Twelve men. The bill went to committee and some of the dirty dozen filibustered until the bill was held over until the fall. Still very little press for us. 16 adopted people decided that the right to know was their human right, not just a privilege to be meted out to government. The HR case may not make hay in an HR tibunal, but it sure got the media to listen to us. I actually think it is a human right and so does the UN, not that our federal government cares, but it is a case. That’s the way it works here. Privacy commissioners are strong and getting stronger. They seem to have a huge influence on laws, yet they are not elected. What’s worse is that this will affect open records across the country, so the fight here is pivotal. There are three provinces with disclosure vetoes and the advocates in those places would love to get rid of them (like Western Australia did just this month). That’s the short story of it. Karen

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Unlike Dr. Kervokain’s description of adoptees as stalkers, liars and murderers.  There’s names for people like her, but no doubt if I used them here somebody would forward them to her. This just isn’t true – if you read what’s in the public record she didn’t say this at all! The only name calling and bitterness I’ve seen is from those who don’t seem to like her. I don’t find that particularly helpful at all – it dimishes the open records argument. Personally, I’d not have filed a suit.  There are other, more fun ways, to to handle people like her and run her out of business personall.  And why in the world do the nanny socialists up there have a "privacy" commissioner to start with?  There is no such thing as privacy.  Only secrets. it’s unfortunate that your life experiences have jaded your view in this way. Privacy does exist – it’s important as a social good.

Privacy does not exist in the United States where it is construed as keeping the state out of the personal business of it’s citizens.  Take a look at Griswold.  I know you’re from up north, but ever hear of the Patriot Act, Homeland Security,  Real ID, TSA?  The state can do anything it wants, can snoop on anybody it wants, doesn’t need search warrants any more in some cases, basically monitors what we do. Oh, and it can see what books you took out of the library, just in case Osama, who you’re hiding in your home, gets a hankering to read Barbara Cartland.  Ideally, for me, the state shouldn’t even issue birth certificates, death certificaets, marriages licences, etc. But as long as they do, it’s in the pubic record, at least here. (A lot of people however do confuse secrecy for privacy, so you’re not alone).

I’ve been in this racket for 30 years,  Hiding somebody’s public birth record means that the over-arching nanny state protects the secrets of individuals.   I don’t know how anybody can live in  Socialist Canada–except to escape the National Socialist US.  My birth father who is 77 and lives in Amherst  keeps talking about moving to St. Catherines to get away from Bush. Marley

Response:

I understand the frustration in not being able to get media attention to counteract the IPC.  I was disheartened by all the media reports slamming the bill and accepting the IPC’s criticism–especially when I find her analysis to be so utterly facile and, out and out, wrong. Moreover, I am aware of the old adage that any press is good press–it’s just that, in this case, the press that these complaints will generate is going to hurt your cause.  Presumably, the goal is to try to sway public opinion in favour of opening records retroactively, without a disclosure (or contact?) veto.  How are these complaints going to help do that?  Hell, I support your cause, disagree vehemently with the IPC’s comments and, yet, I’m distinctly unimpressed with these complaints.  I can only imagine the thoughts of someone who agrees with the IPC.

You may be right, but if we had done nothing at all, for *sure* we would be stuck with a disclosure veto. Finally the press is listening to us and hearing about valid reasons to not have a DV. Since we do think that it’s a human right that trumps the vested right of nparents (taken in the oppositional context of the legal system, what we’re stuck with), we think it’s a good idea to demonstrate this to the public. To the extent that this is about selling a message, think about what these complaints have done.  The IPC is being lauded for standing up for the "fearful, cowering woman who needs protection" (to use your phrase).  Now, she can add to that the spectre that the adoption lobby is trying to coerce her into silence by launching frivolous legal proceedings.

We are trying to make it clear to the press that it’s been US who has been silenced. They appear to be hearing this. I actually think it is a human right and so does the UN, not that our federal government cares, but it is a case. Perhaps it is a case.  It’s just not a very good one.  In fact, it’s a pretty bad one.  And one that, incidentally, won’t be resolved for years unless a settlement is reached (the OHRC is notoriously slow and has a huge backlog).  All of which poses a problem for your cause.  If you had a slam dunk case, that would be one thing.  As it is, it just looks like sour grapes.

It may take years, yes. But if we lose this bill it will be years and years before we get another one. If we lose the HR case, we will be no further behind. That’s the way it works here. Privacy commissioners are strong and getting stronger. They seem to have a huge influence on laws, yet they are not elected. Lots of people who aren’t elected have a huge influence on laws–that’s not news.

Yeah sure, but it is news for a privacy commissioner to take such an aggressive stance against an open records bill. What was news was that a provincial government in Canada was prepared to open adoption records retroactively.  It was prepared to do so without a disclosure veto (albeit, with a contact veto).  It was resisting vocal opposition from an independent officer of the legislature to include a disclosure veto.  All of which was newsworthy within the Canadian context.

Resisting? Some don’t think so – not much anyway. We’ll find out in the fall just how strong their resistance has been. Maybe I’ve misunderstood your motives.  If you were out to scuttle the bill in its entirety because of the existence of the contact veto (I think Marley has elsewhere suggested that was her ideal–I could be wrong on that) then you may yet be successful.  Who knows?

No we aren’t out to scuttle the bill. We are out to get the best we can within our context. We are not like the US. Look at NL, AB and BC. Politicians here (except the government in ON) resist the experience of open records in other countries. I’m finding the whole process pretty ugly and devoid of common sense on both sides.  I guess that’s why I try to avoid partisan politics.

Then what would have been a better strategy? The adoption community, at least almost all I know here, are thrilled that finally we are being heard. BTW this isn’t partisan. The NDP and the Liberals are united in this. Karen – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Tom

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sixteen adoptees have filed human rights complaints with the Ontario Human Rights Commission against Ann Cavoukian, Information and Privacy Commissioner in Ontario. They are alleging that the privacy commissioner intended to incite the infringement of the right to equal treatment because of family status – they are adopted. This is contrary to section 13 (1) of the Ontario Human Rights Code. Dumb, dumb, dumb. This is not the way you get open records. I don’t know the legal system in Canada, but I bet it’s highly unlikely a HR Commission will slap a government official who is, after all, exercising one of the duties of his office. And now you’ve pissed him off, and will undoubtedly pissed off a number of MPs. It’s a club, remember? Y’all have a hearing going on about how clubby the Liberals are, in fact, if you need a reminder. This is more of the liberal-weenie nanny-state approach to problem-solving, and it won’t work — not in Canada and not in the U.S. You want open records? Go into your parliament and fight for them. Indeed, I too was astounded when I read the original post.  The complaint likely has little merit–and strategically, it makes adoptees look like a bunch of whiners who are trying to intimidate (through the use of bogus legal proceedings) those who oppose the Bill. To put it bluntly, it’s the equivalent of a child throwing a tantrum when he doesn’t get his way–which I wouldn’t have thought is exactly the image you want to convey when trying to open records retroactively. Tom

Unlike Dr. Kervokain’s description of adoptees as stalkers, liars and murderers.  There’s names for people like her, but no doubt if I used them here somebody would forward them to her.  Personally, I’d not have filed a suit.  There are other, more fun ways, to to handle people like her and run her out of business personall.  And why in the world do the nanny socialists up there have a "privacy" commissioner to start with?  There is no such thing as privacy.  Only secrets. Marley

Response:

She  hasn’t even read the complaint, yet she (or her flunky press person) issued a public rebuttal.  That’s just not done.  It’s usually "no comment."  So what’s up with that?  Maybe she has a little secret back in Armenia.

You had people from COAR issuing press releases already – perhaps that’s why she responded. I don’t understand the Armenia comment – I doubt she’s even been there. PHT

Response:

Unlike Dr. Kervokain’s description of adoptees as stalkers, liars and murderers.  There’s names for people like her, but no doubt if I used them here somebody would forward them to her.

This just isn’t true – if you read what’s in the public record she didn’t say this at all! The only name calling and bitterness I’ve seen is from those who don’t seem to like her. I don’t find that particularly helpful at all – it dimishes the open records argument. Personally, I’d not have filed a suit.  There are other, more fun ways, to to handle people like her and run her out of business personall.  And why in the world do the nanny socialists up there have a "privacy" commissioner to start with?  There is no such thing as privacy.  Only secrets.

it’s unfortunate that your life experiences have jaded your view in this way. Privacy does exist – it’s important as a social good. (A lot of people however do confuse secrecy for privacy, so you’re not alone).

Response:

snip Indeed, I too was astounded when I read the original post.  The complaint likely has little merit–and strategically, it makes adoptees look like a bunch of whiners who are trying to intimidate (through the use of bogus legal proceedings) those who oppose the Bill. To put it bluntly, it’s the equivalent of a child throwing a tantrum when he doesn’t get his way–which I wouldn’t have thought is exactly the image you want to convey when trying to open records retroactively. Tom Unlike Dr. Kervokain’s description of adoptees as stalkers, liars and murderers.  There’s names for people like her, but no doubt if I used them here somebody would forward them to her.

She’s called adoptees stalkers, liars and murderers?  Good God, I hadn’t read that.  However, I do agree that she’s been over the top. Moreover, I’ve found her analysis of the issues to be deeply flawed and oddly one-sided.  Sometimes, when I read some of her statements, I’m floored that (a) anyone could say what she’s been saying with a straight face, and (b) anyone would believe what she’s saying.  But, be that as it may, she has been extremely effective in persuading people that her criticism of the Bill is legitimate.  In other words, she’s winning the communications war.  Frankly, bringing bogus legal proceedings against her just strengthens her position. Personally, I’d not have filed a suit.  There are other, more fun ways, to to handle people like her and run her out of business personall.  And why in the world do the nanny socialists up there have a "privacy" commissioner to start with?  There is no such thing as privacy.  Only secrets.

Her role is actually the _Information and_ Privacy Commissioner. Originally, these offices were created to deal with access to information requests to governments.  The idea, generally speaking, is that there should be checks and balances to access to information–hence, the concept of an Information and Privacy Commissioner.  That’s it in a nutshell.  However, privacy is the current buzzword up here.  Frankly, it’s all the rage in legal circles.  I had expected a more persuasive argument from her; but, I’m not surprised that the Privacy Commissioner is the one holding up the legislation. Tom

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sixteen adoptees have filed human rights complaints with the Ontario Human Rights Commission against Ann Cavoukian, Information and Privacy Commissioner in Ontario. They are alleging that the privacy commissioner intended to incite the infringement of the right to equal treatment because of family status – they are adopted. This is contrary to section 13 (1) of the Ontario Human Rights Code. Dumb, dumb, dumb. This is not the way you get open records. I don’t know the legal system in Canada, but I bet it’s highly unlikely a HR Commission will slap a government official who is, after all, exercising one of the duties of his office. And now you’ve pissed him off, and will undoubtedly pissed off a number of MPs. It’s a club, remember? Y’all have a hearing going on about how clubby the Liberals are, in fact, if you need a reminder. This is more of the liberal-weenie nanny-state approach to problem-solving, and it won’t work — not in Canada and not in the U.S. You want open records? Go into your parliament and fight for them. steve

I don’t think what you’ve been following what’s going on there.  In 30 years of this crap I’ve never seen so much hate spewed against adopted persons as came from her. If’ she’d talked that way about racial or religious minorities she’d have been booted out at once.   According to her, adoptees are  liars, stalkers, killers, and responsible for honor  killings. The bill in question, Bill 183 is a government bill (brought by the government, not any adoptee rights group)  which permitted records access to adoptees and bparents, which was a big mistake.  Though I personally not only support records access for bparents, but for the general public (records should be open for anybody) this is a huge legislative mistake that has scuttled more than one access bill.  BN opposed it due to it’s contact veto and $50,000 fine.  Cavoukian has gutted the bill.  Nobody wants it now. She has also caused extreme harm to records access bill throughout North America, where adopted persons can now be seen as a "suspect class"–not in the legal sense, but the moral sense.  Cavoukian  has some serious problem with adoption in general and adopted persons in particular.  Her long prepared statement is really odd.  She hasn’t even read the complaint, yet she (or her flunky press person) issued a public rebuttal.  That’s just not done.  It’s usually "no comment."  So what’s up with that?  Maybe she has a little secret back in Armenia. Marley

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Sixteen adoptees have filed human rights complaints with the Ontario Human Rights Commission against Ann Cavoukian, Information and Privacy Commissioner in Ontario. They are alleging that the privacy commissioner intended to incite the infringement of the right to equal treatment because of family status – they are adopted. This is contrary to section 13 (1) of the Ontario Human Rights Code. Dumb, dumb, dumb. This is not the way you get open records. I don’t know the legal system in Canada, but I bet it’s highly unlikely a HR Commission will slap a government official who is, after all, exercising one of the duties of his office. And now you’ve pissed him off, and will undoubtedly pissed off a number of MPs. It’s a club, remember? Y’all have a hearing going on about how clubby the Liberals are, in fact, if you need a reminder. This is more of the liberal-weenie nanny-state approach to problem-solving, and it won’t work — not in Canada and not in the U.S. You want open records? Go into your parliament and fight for them.

Indeed, I too was astounded when I read the original post.  The complaint likely has little merit–and strategically, it makes adoptees look like a bunch of whiners who are trying to intimidate (through the use of bogus legal proceedings) those who oppose the Bill. To put it bluntly, it’s the equivalent of a child throwing a tantrum when he doesn’t get his way–which I wouldn’t have thought is exactly the image you want to convey when trying to open records retroactively. Tom

Response:

Adoptees should not have the right to know who their birth parents are. They should have the right to their medical history. No more! The rights of adoptees stop where the rights of birth parents begin. Jean-Pierre Gauthier

Are you just being sarcastic? Or are you phenomenally ignorant of the issues involved? Or are you perhaps just a bit of a troll? Robin Harritt

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Groundless complaint has no foundation in fact or in law     TORONTO, June 23 / The following statement was issued today by Ontario Information and Privacy Commissioner Ann Cavoukian, in response to media calls:     I have learned through two media calls that a number of adoptees have filed a complaint against me with the Ontario Human Rights Commission, claiming that I have breached a provision of Ontario’s Human Rights Code (Code). I have not seen this complaint, nor have I received any official notification of its existence, either from the complainants or from the Human Rights Commission.

She hasn’t been officially notified, yet she’s already responding to media reports? Strange. Rh. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I regret to say that I see the filing of this complaint as an effort to silence my voice and discourage me from performing my duties to the public and the Ontario Legislature. This kind of complaint represents a grave threat to the public’s right to hear and participate in a vigorous public debate. Further it could have a chilling effect on the free speech of all Ontarians. Anyone advancing a dissenting view could be vulnerable to this kind of legal proceeding. Moreover, this complaint has no foundation whatsoever in fact or in law. From what a reporter has passed on to me, I understand that these individuals allege that my public statements on Bill 183, the Adoption Information Disclosure Act, including my statements in legislative committee hearings and on my office website, are "intended to incite the infringement of the right to equal treatment without discrimination on the basis of family or marital status." To the contrary, my public statements on the important issues raised by Bill 183 are designed to ensure that the legislation ultimately enacted strikes an appropriate balance between the rights of all concerned, including the rights of individuals to learn the identities of their birth parents or adopted children and the rights of both groups to protect their privacy against unwanted disclosure of their identities. I have a solemn statutory duty as the Information and Privacy Commissioner of Ontario and an Officer of the Legislature to provide public comment on the privacy protection implications of proposed legislative schemes or government programs. This is enshrined in section 59(a) of the Freedom of Information and Protection of Privacy Act. The provision in the Code which I have allegedly breached expressly states that it does not interfere with anyone’s freedom of expression of opinion. In advising the Legislature and the public, I am expressing my opinion as an Officer of the Legislature, appointed for this very purpose. This is my job. To say that I could be in breach of the Human Rights Code for doing what the legislation requires me to do simply makes no sense. In legal terms, it would be considered patently unreasonable. In my role as Commissioner, I provide advice to the Legislature on the nature of the legislation it should enact. If the Commissioner can be silenced for advising the Legislature on proposed legislation through such complaints, what about an MPP or the leader of the opposition? Not only is the position I have taken not discriminatory in any way, it is quite the opposite. It is designed to ensure that the Legislature strikes an effective balance and reflects the rights and interests of all concerned. The legislation reflected in Bill 183 – in whatever final form it takes – will of course be subject to the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms. If the legislation faces a Charter challenge, the courts will necessary require that competing rights be considered and balanced. Today, my goal is to ensure that the voices of all parties are heard, and that privacy rights are not trampled upon as we move to openness. To silence the voices of the minority would indeed be a travesty – I will not ignore them, nor should the public or the Legislature. For further information: Media Contact: Bob Spence, Communications

Response:

Adoptees should not have the right to know who their birth parents are. They should have the right to their medical history. No more! The rights of adoptees stop where the rights of birth parents begin.

Nice.  Obviously, you’re not an adoptee. — —— Robyn Resident Witchypoo #1557 Science doesn’t burn people at the stake for disagreeing – Vic Sagerquist

Response:

Adoptees should not have the right to know who their birth parents are. They should have the right to their medical history. No more! The rights of adoptees stop where the rights of birth parents begin. Jean-Pierre Gauthier

Response:

Sixteen adoptees have filed human rights complaints with the Ontario Human Rights Commission against Ann Cavoukian, Information and Privacy Commissioner in Ontario. They are alleging that the privacy commissioner intended to incite the infringement of the right to equal treatment because of family status – they are adopted. This is contrary to section 13 (1) of the Ontario Human Rights Code.

Dumb, dumb, dumb. This is not the way you get open records. I don’t know the legal system in Canada, but I bet it’s highly unlikely a HR Commission will slap a government official who is, after all, exercising one of the duties of his office. And now you’ve pissed him off, and will undoubtedly pissed off a number of MPs. It’s a club, remember? Y’all have a hearing going on about how clubby the Liberals are, in fact, if you need a reminder. This is more of the liberal-weenie nanny-state approach to problem-solving, and it won’t work — not in Canada and not in the U.S. You want open records? Go into your parliament and fight for them. steve

Response:

Groundless complaint has no foundation in fact or in law     TORONTO, June 23 / The following statement was issued today by Ontario Information and Privacy Commissioner Ann Cavoukian, in response to media calls:     I have learned through two media calls that a number of adoptees have filed a complaint against me with the Ontario Human Rights Commission, claiming that I have breached a provision of Ontario’s Human Rights Code (Code). I have not seen this complaint, nor have I received any official notification of its existence, either from the complainants or from the Human Rights Commission. I regret to say that I see the filing of this complaint as an effort to silence my voice and discourage me from performing my duties to the public and the Ontario Legislature. This kind of complaint represents a grave threat to the public’s right to hear and participate in a vigorous public debate. Further it could have a chilling effect on the free speech of all Ontarians. Anyone advancing a dissenting view could be vulnerable to this kind of legal proceeding. Moreover, this complaint has no foundation whatsoever in fact or in law. From what a reporter has passed on to me, I understand that these individuals allege that my public statements on Bill 183, the Adoption Information Disclosure Act, including my statements in legislative committee hearings and on my office website, are "intended to incite the infringement of the right to equal treatment without discrimination on the basis of family or marital status." To the contrary, my public statements on the important issues raised by Bill 183 are designed to ensure that the legislation ultimately enacted strikes an appropriate balance between the rights of all concerned, including the rights of individuals to learn the identities of their birth parents or adopted children and the rights of both groups to protect their privacy against unwanted disclosure of their identities. I have a solemn statutory duty as the Information and Privacy Commissioner of Ontario and an Officer of the Legislature to provide public comment on the privacy protection implications of proposed legislative schemes or government programs. This is enshrined in section 59(a) of the Freedom of Information and Protection of Privacy Act. The provision in the Code which I have allegedly breached expressly states that it does not interfere with anyone’s freedom of expression of opinion. In advising the Legislature and the public, I am expressing my opinion as an Officer of the Legislature, appointed for this very purpose. This is my job. To say that I could be in breach of the Human Rights Code for doing what the legislation requires me to do simply makes no sense. In legal terms, it would be considered patently unreasonable. In my role as Commissioner, I provide advice to the Legislature on the nature of the legislation it should enact. If the Commissioner can be silenced for advising the Legislature on proposed legislation through such complaints, what about an MPP or the leader of the opposition? Not only is the position I have taken not discriminatory in any way, it is quite the opposite. It is designed to ensure that the Legislature strikes an effective balance and reflects the rights and interests of all concerned. The legislation reflected in Bill 183 – in whatever final form it takes – will of course be subject to the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms. If the legislation faces a Charter challenge, the courts will necessary require that competing rights be considered and balanced. Today, my goal is to ensure that the voices of all parties are heard, and that privacy rights are not trampled upon as we move to openness. To silence the voices of the minority would indeed be a travesty – I will not ignore them, nor should the public or the Legislature. For further information: Media Contact: Bob Spence, Communications

Response:

Coalition for Open Adoption Records                                                                  Wednesday, June 22, 2005 Adoptees File Human Rights Complaints against the Ontario Privacy Commissioner Sixteen adoptees have filed human rights complaints with the Ontario Human Rights Commission against Ann Cavoukian, Information and Privacy Commissioner in Ontario. They are alleging that the privacy commissioner intended to incite the infringement of the right to equal treatment because of family status – they are adopted. This is contrary to section 13 (1) of the Ontario Human Rights Code. The complaints are a response to the vigorous campaign the privacy commissioner has waged in the media against Bill 183, the Adoption Disclosure Act, that the Liberal government introduced in the Ontario legislature on March 29, 2005. Adopted people only want basic information about themselves. Adult adopted people, unlike all other Ontarians, are currently unable to have access to their original birth certificates. A birth certificate contains essential knowledge about one’s identity:

Question:

Hello Eveyone, Just wondering if anyone has done this.  My Wife was adopted by her stepdad as a child.  Now as an adult, she wants to cut all ties with him, and restablish her birth dad as the the father on her birth certificate. Any clue how this can be done? Thank you, Tom from Pa.

I do not know if this could be done, but thinking it through logically, the process probably would have to be: 1. her natural father makes an application to adopt her as an adult child; 2. the issue of need to dispense with the consent of her father would be dealt with 3. a Court would have to consider the issue of granting the adoption of an adult child The red herring legally speaking in this legal question is distinguishing between legal/natural parents – her natural father has had any natural rights extinguished in law. He is a stranger to her, and thus some juristic basis for the adoption would have to be established. The only basis that I could really think of for doing this would be it would enrich some lawyer or drive a court staff person mad trying to help someone do it themselves. Doug Thomas

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hello Eveyone, Just wondering if anyone has done this.  My Wife was adopted by her stepdad as a child.  Now as an adult, she wants to cut all ties with him, and restablish her birth dad as the the father on her birth certificate. Any clue how this can be done? Thank you, Tom from Pa. Tom, I found this for you: http://www.adoptioninformation.com/resources/legal/adultadopt/adad-pa… Apparently, there is a process for this and an amended birth certificate can be part of the process.  If the birth father is also PA resident, this should be doable. If he lives in another state, the circumstances can be murky.The law varies from state to state and some states don’t allow adult adoption. I’d be curious to hear if this works out for you(her).

Wow, All good stuff.   I like the idea about no consent since the step dad is not a very happy person, infact hasn’t been since my Wifey secretly tried and succeeded in finding her birth dad as a teenager.   Now just one little thing to work out, I’ll have to find out how to get the adoption to occur(figuring it has to take place in PA), while the adopting parent(this case the birth dad) lives in colorado. But thanks again, eveyone, running this by the Wifey.  I’m sure she’ll be glad we got some information to start with. later, tom

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hello Eveyone, Just wondering if anyone has done this.  My Wife was adopted by her stepdad as a child.  Now as an adult, she wants to cut all ties with him, and restablish her birth dad as the the father on her birth certificate. Any clue how this can be done? Thank you, Tom from Pa. Tom, I found this for you: http://www.adoptioninformation.com/resources/legal/adultadopt/adad-pa… Apparently, there is a process for this and an amended birth certificate can be part of the process.  If the birth father is also PA resident, this should be doable. If he lives in another state, the circumstances can be murky.The law varies from state to state and some states don’t allow adult adoption. I’d be curious to hear if this works out for you(her). Wow, All good stuff. I like the idea about no consent since the step dad is not a very happy person, infact hasn’t been since my Wifey secretly tried and succeeded in finding her birth dad as a teenager. Now just one little thing to work out, I’ll have to find out how to get the adoption to occur(figuring it has to take place in PA), while the adopting parent(this case the birth dad) lives in colorado. But thanks again, eveyone, running this by the Wifey.  I’m sure she’ll be glad we got some information to start with. later, tom

If your wife isn’t over 21, it seems it can be done in Colorado: 19-5-201. Who may be adopted. Statute text Any child under eighteen years of age present in the state at the time the petition for adoption is filed and legally available for adoption as provided in section 19-5-203 may be adopted. Upon approval of the court, a person eighteen years of age or older and under twenty-one years of age may be adopted as a child, and all provisions of this part 2 referring to the adoption of a child shall apply to such a person. History Source: L. 87: Entire title R&RE, p. 805,

Question:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – What this means to me is that open records/equal access for all isn’t causing a ruckus and it’s just another day in the neighborhood — as it should have been all along. pb… Yes, so it would seem.  By all accounts there already seems to be an extraordinary number of adoptees in the US who have managed to discover their  identities and have reunited well before the records were even opened. So for all intents and purposes those rabid opponents of open records have been creating what turns out to be a "storm in a teacup." As they have elswhere.      There are more than a few adoptees who have figured out thier origins. These are the lucky ones. There are still many who cannot access thier records due to retrictive laws, cultural barriers and/or religious pressure. Hopefully the results seen in New Hampshire will encourage other states to adopt similar legislation. There are those misguided souls who seem to feel that if you can sever an adoptee completely from his/her biological roots then you can form a perfect graft between them and the adoptive family. These misguided souls are not adoptees I would venture. Sadly the BSH laws accomplish exactly that by severng the infant from his/her biological roots. When these infants grow to adulthood thier chances of filling that void within them will be almost impossible to do. Wasn’t that "tempest in a teapot"? ;-} Raymond Sadly so. Those BSH laws, which encourage wilful identity loss for a child, are an act of utter legislative negligence given that the legislature is well aware of the long term detrimental effects to children who were adopted under the closed system and whose identities were sealed away – which is why they are now legislating to open records. But to introduce legislation that will create those same, but unalterable consequences, is no less than  legislative vandalism IMHO.

I love your term "legislative vandalism."  Can I use it.  It’s prefect! If you want to stop abandonments you need to find out ‘why’ it is occurring and rectify ‘the cause’ of the problem. Simply making a tragedy legal resolves nothing.

But that would take a lot of work, Di.  And you won’t get your 15 minutes of fame for 45 years. Marley

Response:

Sadly so. Those BSH laws, which encourage wilful identity loss for a child, are an act of utter legislative negligence given that the legislature is well aware of the long term detrimental effects to children who were adopted under the closed system and whose identities were sealed away – which is why they are now legislating to open records. But to introduce legislation that will create those same, but unalterable consequences, is no less than  legislative vandalism IMHO.

I love your term "legislative vandalism."  Can I use it.  It’s prefect! LOL! Marley, be my guest :-) If you want to stop abandonments you need to find out ‘why’ it is occurring and rectify ‘the cause’ of the problem. Simply making a tragedy legal resolves nothing.

But that would take a lot of work, Di.  And you won’t get your 15 minutes of fame for 45 years. Marley Indeed. Trigger happy lawmakers seem to be the rule lately. Remember that bill they were going to introduce where a woman had to publicly name  all the men she slept with which was swiftly repealed….probably because the legislators realised married men might also be named?  Was it in Florida? It was another  ill-conceived law.

Response:

Remember that bill they were going to introduce where a woman had to publicly name  all the men she slept with which was swiftly repealed….probably because the legislators realised married men might also be named?  Was it in Florida? It was another   ill-conceived law.

Yup, it was Florida. They tolerate Marcy, too. steve

Response:

Remember that bill they were going to introduce where a woman had to publicly name  all the men she slept with which was swiftly repealed….probably because the legislators realised married men might also be named?

I can’t help but wonder how many legislators were concerned they might be named. I wonder also, was there any proviso to allow for those who were named in spite rather than from fact ? Was it repealed or simply never made it to or through a vote? Raymond

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – parents have filled out the form, Bolton said. Four or five said they’d welcome contact, while the rest have requested no contact. Of those saying they’d prefer not to be contacted, nine have filled out a medical history form. Hardly enough for a statistical sample, but interesting that so many have requested no contact.   Why would you, after so long, go down and fill out a form requesting that your adult birth child not contact you? Still that deep and dark a family secret?  Or is this on new births/relinquishments?   Chickeyd

IMO, it’s really hard to make any conclusions from either the first few days’ requests for OBC’s or the filing of CPF’s. Unless there is a concerted effort to organize people to march over to the clerk’s office, like there was in Oregon, there isn’t likely to be a spontaneous mass application. Same for birthparents filing contact preference forms. My guess would be that the birthparents filing CPF’s were ones that had followed the legislation and were waiting to do so. Perhaps they were organized. Let’s see what happens after a year. Ron – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – From article: "So far, only 19 birth parents have filled out the form, Bolton said. Four or five said they’d welcome contact, while the rest have requested no contact." ~~~ Interesting, no? Guess good ol bio-mom/pop don’t want their long-ago offspring in their lives. I’d say  if only 19 n/parents in an entire state have bothered to go down and lodge either an objection to contact,  or would welcome contact but only through a mediator, it suggests that the vast majority of parents out there who relinqished in that state are quite open to be contacted directly. Remember that it is only those who don’t want contact or who want it controlled through a mediation service, need to fill out any forms. On the other hand it could also suggest that few people are yet to be made aware of the opening of records in that state. What this means to me is that open records/equal access for all isn’t causing a ruckus and it’s just another day in the neighborhood — as it should have been all along. pb… Yes, so it would seem.  By all accounts there already seems to be an extraordinary number of adoptees in the US who have managed to discover their  identities and have reunited well before the records were even opened. So for all intents and purposes those rabid opponents of open records have been creating what turns out to be a "storm in a teacup." As they have elswhere.

I totally agree.  Records are opened and the sky isn’t falling!  What a concept!  LOL A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!" —–Unknown

Response:

What this means to me is that open records/equal access for all isn’t causing a ruckus and it’s just another day in the neighborhood — as it should have been all along. pb… Yes, so it would seem.  By all accounts there already seems to be an extraordinary number of adoptees in the US who have managed to discover their  identities and have reunited well before the records were even opened. So for all intents and purposes those rabid opponents of open records have been creating what turns out to be a "storm in a teacup." As they have elswhere.

      There are more than a few adoptees who have figured out thier origins. These are the lucky ones. There are still many who cannot access thier records due to retrictive laws, cultural barriers and/or religious pressure. Hopefully the results seen in New Hampshire will encourage other states to adopt similar legislation. There are those misguided souls who seem to feel that if you can sever an adoptee completely from his/her biological roots then you can form a perfect graft between them and the adoptive family. These misguided souls are not adoptees I would venture. Sadly the BSH laws accomplish exactly that by severng the infant from his/her biological roots. When these infants grow to adulthood thier chances of filling that void within them will be almost impossible to do. Wasn’t that "tempest in a teapot"? ;-} Raymond Sadly so. Those BSH laws, which encourage wilful identity loss for a child, are an act of utter legislative negligence given that the legislature is well aware of the long term detrimental effects to children who were adopted under the closed system and whose identities were sealed away – which is why they are now legislating to open records. But to introduce legislation that will create those same, but unalterable consequences, is no less than  legislative vandalism IMHO. If you want to stop abandonments you need to find out ‘why’ it is occurring and rectify ‘the cause’ of the problem. Simply making a tragedy legal resolves nothing.

Response:

What this means to me is that open records/equal access for all isn’t causing a ruckus and it’s just another day in the neighborhood — as it should have been all along. pb… Yes, so it would seem.  By all accounts there already seems to be an extraordinary number of adoptees in the US who have managed to discover their  identities and have reunited well before the records were even opened. So for all intents and purposes those rabid opponents of open records have been creating what turns out to be a "storm in a teacup." As they have elswhere.

      There are more than a few adoptees who have figured out thier origins. These are the lucky ones. There are still many who cannot access thier records due to retrictive laws, cultural barriers and/or religious pressure. Hopefully the results seen in New Hampshire will encourage other states to adopt similar legislation. There are those misguided souls who seem to feel that if you can sever an adoptee completely from his/her biological roots then you can form a perfect graft between them and the adoptive family. These misguided souls are not adoptees I would venture. Sadly the BSH laws accomplish exactly that by severng the infant from his/her biological roots. When these infants grow to adulthood thier chances of filling that void within them will be almost impossible to do. Wasn’t that "tempest in a teapot"? ;-} Raymond

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – From article: "So far, only 19 birth parents have filled out the form, Bolton said. Four or five said they’d welcome contact, while the rest have requested no contact." ~~~ Interesting, no? Guess good ol bio-mom/pop don’t want their long-ago offspring in their lives. I’d say  if only 19 n/parents in an entire state have bothered to go down and lodge either an objection to contact,  or would welcome contact but only through a mediator, it suggests that the vast majority of parents out there who relinqished in that state are quite open to be contacted directly. Remember that it is only those who don’t want contact or who want it controlled through a mediation service, need to fill out any forms. On the other hand it could also suggest that few people are yet to be made aware of the opening of records in that state.

What this means to me is that open records/equal access for all isn’t causing a ruckus and it’s just another day in the neighborhood — as it should have been all along. pb… Yes, so it would seem.  By all accounts there already seems to be an extraordinary number of adoptees in the US who have managed to discover their  identities and have reunited well before the records were even opened. So for all intents and purposes those rabid opponents of open records have been creating what turns out to be a "storm in a teacup." As they have elswhere.

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – From article: "So far, only 19 birth parents have filled out the form, Bolton said. Four or five said they’d welcome contact, while the rest have requested no contact." ~~~ Interesting, no? Guess good ol bio-mom/pop don’t want their long-ago offspring in their lives. I’d say  if only 19 n/parents in an entire state have bothered to go down and lodge either an objection to contact,  or would welcome contact but only through a mediator, it suggests that the vast majority of parents out there who relinqished in that state are quite open to be contacted directly. Remember that it is only those who don’t want contact or who want it controlled through a mediation service, need to fill out any forms. On the other hand it could also suggest that few people are yet to be made aware of the opening of records in that state.

What this means to me is that open records/equal access for all isn’t causing a ruckus and it’s just another day in the neighborhood — as it should have been all along. pb…

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From article: "So far, only 19 birth parents have filled out the form, Bolton said. Four or five said they’d welcome contact, while the rest have requested no contact." ~~~ Interesting, no? Guess good ol bio-mom/pop don’t want their long-ago offspring in their lives.

Yeah, it happens. See website: Dysfunctional Adoptee Reunions http://dysfunctionaladopteereunions.blogspot.com/ Bad adoptee reunions with birth parents, dysfunctional and damaging

I think I’ll start my own site, "People With No Connection to Adoption But Nevertheless Have An Axe To Grind". You, Jessica Debalzo, Neal Feldman, and the Morrisseys could all be featured. Ron – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – From article: "So far, only 19 birth parents have filled out the form, Bolton said. Four or five said they’d welcome contact, while the rest have requested no contact." ~~~ Interesting, no? Guess good ol bio-mom/pop don’t want their long-ago offspring in their lives. I’d say  if only 19 n/parents in an entire state have bothered to go down and lodge either an objection to contact,  or would welcome contact but only through a mediator, it suggests that the vast majority of parents out there who relinqished in that state are quite open to be contacted directly. Remember that it is only those who don’t want contact or who want it controlled through a mediation service, need to fill out any forms. On the other hand it could also suggest that few people are yet to be made aware of the opening of records in that state. What this means to me is that open records/equal access for all isn’t causing a ruckus and it’s just another day in the neighborhood — as it should have been all along. pb…

Nine birthparents don’t want to be found! We must recork the malevolent genie bottle of adoption records and reseal them immediately! These adults cannot handle their own affairs without the guidance of the government, what were they THINKING!? If I were an adoptee I would be clutching the wire-frame and terry cloth life-sized model of my adoptive mommy that I keep in garage for such moments and TREMBLE IN TERROR at all the responsibility! Thank god I KNOW people who were adopted, or I wouldn’t have the slimmest excuse to tell them what to think, feel, or do. Ron

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From article:

"So far, only 19 birth parents have filled out the form, Bolton said. Four or five said they’d welcome contact, while the rest have requested no contact." ~~~ Interesting, no? Guess good ol bio-mom/pop don’t want their long-ago offspring in their lives. See website: Dysfunctional Adoptee Reunions http://dysfunctionaladopteereunions.blogspot.com/ Bad adoptee reunions with birth parents, dysfunctional and damaging

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Officials: Demand for adoption records light   81 people came for copies in first week   Valley News —— January 09. 2005 8:00AM Of the thousands of adult adoptees in New Hampshire, only a small fraction have taken advantage of a new state law that allows them to look at their birth records -and makes it easier for them to find their biological families. In the week since the law went into effect, 81 adult adoptees – or members of their immediate family – have come to the Bureau of Vital Records seeking an original copy of their birth certificate, while 101 have requested the document via mail, said Bill Bolton, director of the New Hampshire Vital Records Office. The demand so far is lighter than anticipated, but still double the number of records requests that the bureau usually handles. "I was expecting to be buried and then just digging ourselves out over a couple of weeks," Bolton said late Friday afternoon. Instead, the department has been able to maintain a 15-minute turnaround time for walk-in requests. Although New Hampshire no longer places any restrictions on access to birth certificates, it does ask birth parents to fill out a form on which they can indicate whether they’d like to be contacted by their child, through an intermediary, or not at all. The form is attached to the birth certificate if the adoptee claims it. Birth parents who request no contact are asked to complete a family medical history for their child. So far, only 19 birth parents have filled out the form, Bolton said. Four or five said they’d welcome contact, while the rest have requested no contact. Of those saying they’d prefer not to be contacted, nine have filled out a medical history form. Bolton said he thought that birth parents not wanting contact might be more likely to fill out the form right away. Adoption laws affect large numbers of people: About 127,000 children were adopted in 2001 in the United States – a figure that’s consistent with the number of adoptions that have occurred each year since 1987, according to the federal government’s National Adoption Information Clearinghouse. In New Hampshire, 1,320 adoptions took place in 2000 and 2001, while 800 adoptions occurred in Vermont during that period. The trend toward open adoption records is making it easier for adoptees to look for their birth families. Half of all adoptees in the United States and abroad choose to search for birth relatives at some point in their lives – more than ever before, according to the clearinghouse. Contrary to popular belief, adoption records were open during the first part of the 20th century, said Elizabeth Samuels, a professor at the University of Baltimore School of Law. By 1960, however, 26 states had closed their records, and nearly every state had followed by the late ’80s. (New Hampshire closed its records in 1973.) http://www.concordmonitor.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20050109/REP… RY/501090400/1037/NEWS04 "The Bible is the most shoplifted book in the United States." That Book of Perfectly Useless Information.  Harper Collins (2004)

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From article: "So far, only 19 birth parents have filled out the form, Bolton said. Four or five said they’d welcome contact, while the rest have requested no contact." ~~~ Interesting, no? Guess good ol bio-mom/pop don’t want their long-ago offspring in their lives. I’d say  if only 19 n/parents in an entire state have bothered to go down and lodge either an objection to contact,  or would welcome contact but only through a mediator, it suggests that the vast majority of parents out there who relinqished in that state are quite open to be contacted directly. Remember that it is only those who don’t want contact or who want it controlled through a mediation service, need to fill out any forms. On the other hand it could also suggest that few people are yet to be made aware of the opening of records in that state.

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Of the thousands of adult adoptees in New Hampshire, only a small fraction have taken advantage of a new state law that allows them to look at their birth records -and makes it easier for them to find their biological

families. <snip – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Although New Hampshire no longer places any restrictions on access to birth certificates, it does ask birth parents to fill out a form on which they can indicate whether they’d like to be contacted by their child, through an intermediary, or not at all. The form is attached to the birth certificate if the adoptee claims it. Birth parents who request no contact are asked to complete a family medical history for their child. So far, only 19 birth parents have filled out the form, Bolton said. Four or five said they’d welcome contact, while the rest have requested no contact. Of those saying they’d prefer not to be contacted, nine have filled out a medical history

form. Hardly enough for a statistical sample, but interesting that so many have requested no contact.   Why would you, after so long, go down and fill out a form requesting that your adult birth child not contact you? Still that deep and dark a family secret?  Or is this on new births/relinquishments?   Chickeyd

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Question:

Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa

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Y’know, that is not a bad idea. It would be somewhat ironic if the insurance weasels actually managed to get adoption records opened to determine if adoptees were insurance risks r not. What are the chances? Raymond – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa

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What a wonderful idea!  I would love to be able to tell my children and grandchildren our family medical history. At this time I can only give them one side. Maybe someday I can give them the whole picture. Hope springs eternal. Raymond

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Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa

An interesting question, Rupa.  Traditionally, insurance laws have been states’ responsibility.  The feds have been moving into the area for some time now, so I won’t be surprised to see a battle over what they can ask for and what they can do with what they get.  On one hand, the feds have been taking steps to see that personal medical information is treated with care.  On the other, the feds haven’t been doing much to increase consumers’ rights in other areas of medical insurance.   J. Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

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Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa An interesting question, Rupa.  Traditionally, insurance laws have been states’ responsibility.  The feds have been moving into the area for some time now, so I won’t be surprised to see a battle over what they can ask for and what they can do with what they get.  On one hand, the feds have been taking steps to see that personal medical information is treated with care.  On the other, the feds haven’t been doing much to increase consumers’ rights in other areas of medical insurance.  

I don’t have the reference handy, but I think there is a federal law that prohibits insurance companies from doing that right now. Not 100% sure. steve

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa An interesting question, Rupa.  Traditionally, insurance laws have been states’ responsibility.  The feds have been moving into the area for some time now, so I won’t be surprised to see a battle over what they can ask for and what they can do with what they get.  On one hand, the feds have been taking steps to see that personal medical information is treated with care.  On the other, the feds haven’t been doing much to increase consumers’ rights in other areas of medical insurance. I don’t have the reference handy, but I think there is a federal law that prohibits insurance companies from doing that right now. Not 100% sure.

I’d be interested to know. Friends of mine who aren’t on company plans have been having the hardest time getting medical coverage…especially once they’re past about 40. They talk about their own medical history becoming an issue; I wonder what would happen if insurance companies factored in genetic proclivities as well. Rupa

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa An interesting question, Rupa.  Traditionally, insurance laws have been states’ responsibility.  The feds have been moving into the area for some time now, so I won’t be surprised to see a battle over what they can ask for and what they can do with what they get.  On one hand, the feds have been taking steps to see that personal medical information is treated with care.  On the other, the feds haven’t been doing much to increase consumers’ rights in other areas of medical insurance. I don’t have the reference handy, but I think there is a federal law that prohibits insurance companies from doing that right now. Not 100% sure. I’d be interested to know. Friends of mine who aren’t on company plans have been having the hardest time getting medical coverage…especially once they’re past about 40. They talk about their own medical history becoming an issue; I wonder what would happen if insurance companies factored in genetic proclivities as well. Rupa

Steve is right.  You can read up on it here or run a search on google using "federal law genetic insurance". http://www.law.uh.edu/healthlawperspectives/Genetics/980219Prohibitio… etic.html J. Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa An interesting question, Rupa.  Traditionally, insurance laws have been states’ responsibility.  The feds have been moving into the area for some time now, so I won’t be surprised to see a battle over what they can ask for and what they can do with what they get.  On one hand, the feds have been taking steps to see that personal medical information is treated with care.  On the other, the feds haven’t been doing much to increase consumers’ rights in other areas of medical insurance. I don’t have the reference handy, but I think there is a federal law that prohibits insurance companies from doing that right now. Not 100% sure. I’d be interested to know. Friends of mine who aren’t on company plans have been having the hardest time getting medical coverage…especially once they’re past about 40. They talk about their own medical history becoming an issue; I wonder what would happen if insurance companies factored in genetic proclivities as well. Rupa Steve is right.  You can read up on it here or run a search on google using "federal law genetic insurance". http://www.law.uh.edu/healthlawperspectives/Genetics/980219Prohibitio… etic.html J. Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

I know I already can’t get personal private health insurance because of "information contained in my medical history."  Since my only realy problem is mild to moderate allergies, I have to assume that it’s becasue my family history is discussed in my medical files.  (My father and several other family members were diabetic, my mother has had a heart murmur and has MS, and I have  a history of glaucoma and high blood pressure thrown in there in a few places as well.) Sucks for me, since right now hubby’s compnay is too small to have health coverage and I’m not employeed enough to have any chance of getting in on any group plans.  The few plans I could maybe get in on are too expensive to be able to afford, so we continue to plod along as part of the uninsured masses…..

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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Steve is right.  You can read up on it here or run a search on google using "federal law genetic insurance". http://www.law.uh.edu/healthlawperspectives/Genetics/980219Prohibitio… etic.html J. Thanks, J. I’ve posted a quote from the website (University of Houston Law Center) below: "Both federal and state laws offer some protection against genetic discrimination in employment and insurance. The federal Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 (HIPAA) applies to both self-insured health benefit plans and commercially written health insurance. Previously, self-insured health plans were essentially unregulated and commercially issued health insurance was regulated exclusively by the states. Among other things, HIPAA provides that genetic information may not be considered a "pre-existing condition" to deny or restrict coverage. HIPAA also prohibits charging higher rates to or decreasing the benefits of individuals based on genetic factors. "The other relevant federal law, the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), prohibits discrimination in employment on the basis of disability. An unresolved issue is whether a currently healthy person with a genetic predisposition to illness has a "disability" under the ADA and is thereby protected against employment discrimination. The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission has taken the position that discrimination based on genetic predisposition violates the ADA, but the issue has not been ruled on by any court. Because most people with health insurance obtain coverage through employment, the issue of employment discrimination affects access to both jobs and health insurance for individuals at genetic risk of disease." I guess I’m left with two questions: 1. How is "genetic factors" defined? The context provided on the website seemed to link it to genetic tests. Would it also apply to medical history of bio-families? 2. What are the remedies for an individual who believes they have been denied coverage or overcharged? Can they demand an explanation from an insurer? Can they report the company to…who? Rupa

Egad. You have the Crackangelo virus! steve

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa An interesting question, Rupa.  Traditionally, insurance laws have been states’ responsibility.  The feds have been moving into the area for some time now, so I won’t be surprised to see a battle over what they can ask for and what they can do with what they get.  On one hand, the feds have been taking steps to see that personal medical information is treated with care.  On the other, the feds haven’t been doing much to increase consumers’ rights in other areas of medical insurance. I don’t have the reference handy, but I think there is a federal law that prohibits insurance companies from doing that right now. Not 100% sure. I’d be interested to know. Friends of mine who aren’t on company plans have been having the hardest time getting medical coverage…especially once they’re past about 40. They talk about their own medical history becoming an issue; I wonder what would happen if insurance companies factored in genetic proclivities as well. Rupa Steve is right.  You can read up on it here or run a search on google using "federal law genetic insurance". http://www.law.uh.edu/healthlawperspectives/Genetics/980219Prohibitio… etic.html J. Reply to jmhjmd at aol. I know I already can’t get personal private health insurance because of "information contained in my medical history."  Since my only realy problem is mild to moderate allergies, I have to assume that it’s becasue my family history is discussed in my medical files.  (My father and several other family members were diabetic, my mother has had a heart murmur and has MS, and I have  a history of glaucoma and high blood pressure thrown in there in a few places as well.) Sucks for me, since right now hubby’s compnay is too small to have health coverage and I’m not employeed enough to have any chance of getting in on any group plans.  The few plans I could maybe get in on are too expensive to be able to afford, so we continue to plod along as part of the uninsured masses…..

Another example of why we need to find a way to insure everyone in this country and soon.   J. Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Steve is right.  You can read up on it here or run a search on google using "federal law genetic insurance". http://www.law.uh.edu/healthlawperspectives/Genetics/980219Prohibitio… etic.html J. Thanks, J. I’ve posted a quote from the website (University of Houston Law Center) below: "Both federal and state laws offer some protection against genetic discrimination in employment and insurance. The federal Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 (HIPAA) applies to both self-insured health benefit plans and commercially written health insurance. Previously, self-insured health plans were essentially unregulated and commercially issued health insurance was regulated exclusively by the states. Among other things, HIPAA provides that genetic information may not be considered a "pre-existing condition" to deny or restrict coverage. HIPAA also prohibits charging higher rates to or decreasing the benefits of individuals based on genetic factors. "The other relevant federal law, the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), prohibits discrimination in employment on the basis of disability. An unresolved issue is whether a currently healthy person with a genetic predisposition to illness has a "disability" under the ADA and is thereby protected against employment discrimination. The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission has taken the position that discrimination based on genetic predisposition violates the ADA, but the issue has not been ruled on by any court. Because most people with health insurance obtain coverage through employment, the issue of employment discrimination affects access to both jobs and health insurance for individuals at genetic risk of disease." I guess I’m left with two questions: 1. How is "genetic factors" defined? The context provided on the website seemed to link it to genetic tests. Would it also apply to medical history of bio-families? 2. What are the remedies for an individual who believes they have been denied coverage or overcharged? Can they demand an explanation from an insurer? Can they report the company to…who? Rupa

You’re an inquisitive woman, Rupa.  Since I just spent the better part of the night working with my son on his genetics lesson, I’ll hazard a guess.  Many conditions are known to be genetic.  Even if it’s a recessive, if it showed up in your family medical history it could be red-flagged.  If it’s thought to be dominant?  Bang. As to remedies: in my state, you could file a complaint with the secretary of commerce, who regulates insurance companies licensed to do business here.  I’m not familiar enough with HIPPA to know whether it provides for a cause of action against an insurer that violates it. J. Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I know I already can’t get personal private health insurance because of "information contained in my medical history."  Since my only realy problem is mild to moderate allergies, I have to assume that it’s becasue my family history is discussed in my medical files.  (My father and several other family members were diabetic, my mother has had a heart murmur and has MS, and I have  a history of glaucoma and high blood pressure thrown in there in a few places as well.) Sucks for me, since right now hubby’s compnay is too small to have health coverage and I’m not employeed enough to have any chance of getting in on any group plans.  The few plans I could maybe get in on are too expensive to be able to afford, so we continue to plod along as part of the uninsured masses…..

This is the kind of thing I’m concerned about for adoptees who search out their family medical history. Once you’ve got it, you pretty much can’t not declare it. While if you don’t know any of it, an insurance company is likely to apply averages based on gender and age and similar demographic data. For those with good insurance coverage through their employers (or spouse’s employer) it doesn’t matter. But for people who have to look for private insurance, I would suggest caution. (In the US, of course; this has no applicability to Canada or UK.) Rupa

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa An interesting question, Rupa.  Traditionally, insurance laws have been states’ responsibility.  The feds have been moving into the area for some time now, so I won’t be surprised to see a battle over what they can ask for and what they can do with what they get.  On one hand, the feds have been taking steps to see that personal medical information is treated with care.  On the other, the feds haven’t been doing much to increase consumers’ rights in other areas of medical insurance. I don’t have the reference handy, but I think there is a federal law that prohibits insurance companies from doing that right now. Not 100% sure. I’d be interested to know. Friends of mine who aren’t on company plans have been having the hardest time getting medical

coverage…especially once they’re past about 40. They talk about their own medical history becoming an issue; I wonder what would happen if insurance companies factored in genetic proclivities as well. Rupa Steve is right.  You can read up on it here or run a search on google using "federal law genetic insurance".

http://www.law.uh.edu/healthlawperspectives/Genetics/980219Prohibitio… etic.html J.

Thanks, J. I’ve posted a quote from the website (University of Houston Law Center) below: "Both federal and state laws offer some protection against genetic discrimination in employment and insurance. The federal Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 (HIPAA) applies to both self-insured health benefit plans and commercially written health insurance. Previously, self-insured health plans were essentially unregulated and commercially issued health insurance was regulated exclusively by the states. Among other things, HIPAA provides that genetic information may not be considered a "pre-existing condition" to deny or restrict coverage. HIPAA also prohibits charging higher rates to or decreasing the benefits of individuals based on genetic factors. "The other relevant federal law, the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), prohibits discrimination in employment on the basis of disability. An unresolved issue is whether a currently healthy person with a genetic predisposition to illness has a "disability" under the ADA and is thereby protected against employment discrimination. The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission has taken the position that discrimination based on genetic predisposition violates the ADA, but the issue has not been ruled on by any court. Because most people with health insurance obtain coverage through employment, the issue of employment discrimination affects access to both jobs and health insurance for individuals at genetic risk of disease." I guess I’m left with two questions: 1. How is "genetic factors" defined? The context provided on the website seemed to link it to genetic tests. Would it also apply to medical history of bio-families? 2. What are the remedies for an individual who believes they have been denied coverage or overcharged? Can they demand an explanation from an insurer? Can they report the company to…who? Rupa

Response:

Steve is right.  You can read up on it here or run a search on google using "federal law genetic insurance".

http://www.law.uh.edu/healthlawperspectives/Genetics/980219Prohibitio… etic.html J.

Thanks, J. I’ve posted a quote from the website (University of Houston Law Center) below: "Both federal and state laws offer some protection against genetic discrimination in employment and insurance. The federal Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 (HIPAA) applies to both self-insured health benefit plans and commercially written health insurance. Previously, self-insured health plans were essentially unregulated and commercially issued health insurance was regulated exclusively by the states. Among other things, HIPAA provides that genetic information may not be considered a "pre-existing condition" to deny or restrict coverage. HIPAA also prohibits charging higher rates to or decreasing the benefits of individuals based on genetic factors. "The other relevant federal law, the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), prohibits discrimination in employment on the basis of disability. An unresolved issue is whether a currently healthy person with a genetic predisposition to illness has a "disability" under the ADA and is thereby protected against employment discrimination. The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission has taken the position that discrimination based on genetic predisposition violates the ADA, but the issue has not been ruled on by any court. Because most people with health insurance obtain coverage through employment, the issue of employment discrimination affects access to both jobs and health insurance for individuals at genetic risk of disease." I guess I’m left with two questions: 1. How is "genetic factors" defined? The context provided on the website seemed to link it to genetic tests. Would it also apply to medical history of bio-families? 2. What are the remedies for an individual who believes they have been denied coverage or overcharged? Can they demand an explanation from an insurer? Can they report the company to…who? Rupa

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa An interesting question, Rupa.  Traditionally, insurance laws have been states’ responsibility.  The feds have been moving into the area for some time now, so I won’t be surprised to see a battle over what they can ask for and what they can do with what they get.  On one hand, the feds have been taking steps to see that personal medical information is treated with care.  On the other, the feds haven’t been doing much to increase consumers’ rights in other areas of medical insurance. I don’t have the reference handy, but I think there is a federal law that prohibits insurance companies from doing that right now. Not 100% sure. I’d be interested to know. Friends of mine who aren’t on company plans have been having the hardest time getting medical

coverage…especially once they’re past about 40. They talk about their own medical history becoming an issue; I wonder what would happen if insurance companies factored in genetic proclivities as well. Rupa Steve is right.  You can read up on it here or run a search on google using "federal law genetic insurance".

http://www.law.uh.edu/healthlawperspectives/Genetics/980219Prohibitio… etic.html J.

Thanks, J. This is an excerpt from the reference you posted: "Both federal and state laws offer some protection against genetic discrimination in employment and insurance. The federal Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 (HIPAA) applies to both self-insured health benefit plans and commercially written health insurance. Previously, self-insured health plans were essentially unregulated and commercially issued health insurance was regulated exclusively by the states. Among other things, HIPAA provides that genetic information may not be considered a "pre-existing condition" to deny or restrict coverage. HIPAA also prohibits charging higher rates to or decreasing the benefits of individuals based on genetic factors. "The other relevant federal law, the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), prohibits discrimination in employment on the basis of disability. An unresolved issue is whether a currently healthy person with a genetic predisposition to illness has a "disability" under the ADA and is thereby protected against employment discrimination. The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission has taken the position that discrimination based on genetic predisposition violates the ADA, but the issue has not been ruled on by any court. Because most people with health insurance obtain coverage through employment, the issue of employment discrimination affects access to both jobs and health insurance for individuals at genetic risk of disease." I’m left with two questions: 1. How is "genetic information" defined? From the website referenced (University of Houston Law Center), it seemed to apply more to the results of genetic tests than to medical history of bio-family. Does it also apply to bio-history? 2. What remedies does an individual have? If someone believes they were denied coverage, or overcharged on the basis of their genetic susceptibility, could they demand an explanation from the insurer, and if appropriate, sue them? Rupa

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Are Insurance companies going to be permitted to ask for these before providing medical coverage? Rupa An interesting question, Rupa.  Traditionally, insurance laws have been states’ responsibility.  The feds have been moving into the area for some time now, so I won’t be surprised to see a battle over what they can ask for and what they can do with what they get.  On one hand, the feds have been taking steps to see that personal medical information is treated with care.  On the other, the feds haven’t been doing much to increase consumers’ rights in other areas of medical insurance. I don’t have the reference handy, but I think there is a federal law that prohibits insurance companies from doing that right now. Not 100% sure. I’d be interested to know. Friends of mine who aren’t on company plans have been having the hardest time getting medical

coverage…especially once they’re past about 40. They talk about their own medical history becoming an issue; I wonder what would happen if insurance companies factored in genetic proclivities as well. Rupa Steve is right.  You can read up on it here or run a search on google using "federal law genetic insurance".

http://www.law.uh.edu/healthlawperspectives/Genetics/980219Prohibitio… etic.html J.

Thanks, J. I’ve posted a quote from the website (University of Houston Law Center) below: "Both federal and state laws offer some protection against genetic discrimination in employment and insurance. The federal Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996 (HIPAA) applies to both self-insured health benefit plans and commercially written health insurance…Among other things, HIPAA provides that genetic information may not be considered a "pre-existing condition" to deny or restrict coverage. HIPAA also prohibits charging higher rates to or decreasing the benefits of individuals based on genetic factors. "The other relevant federal law, the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA), prohibits discrimination in employment on the basis of disability. An unresolved issue is whether a currently healthy person with a genetic predisposition to illness has a "disability" under the ADA and is thereby protected against employment discrimination… Because most people with health insurance obtain coverage through employment, the issue of employment discrimination affects access to both jobs and health insurance for individuals at genetic risk of disease." I guess I’m left with two questions: 1. How is "genetic factors" defined? The context provided on the website seemed to link it to genetic tests. Would it also apply to medical history of bio-families? 2. What are the remedies for an individual who believes they have been denied coverage or overcharged? Can they demand an explanation from an insurer? Can they report the company to…who? Rupa

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Does it also sound as though she might have a case against the insurance company who refused her? I wouldn’t think allergies, glaucoma and hypertension (presumably controlled) make one uninsurable. Rupa

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I blaim Google. Though to be fair, in the new Google, it has only showed up once. Rupa

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For the next time someone questions the need for medical histories. J. http://hhs.gov/familyhistory/ U.S. Surgeon General’s Family History Initiative Health care professionals have known for a long time that common diseases – heart disease, cancer, and diabetes – and even rare diseases – like hemophilia, cystic fibrosis, and sickle cell anemia – can run in families. If one generation of a family has high blood pressure, it is not unusual for the next generation to have similarly high blood pressure. Tracing the illnesses suffered by your parents, grandparents, and other blood relatives can help your doctor predict the disorders to which you may be at risk and take action to keep you and your family healthy. To help focus attention on the importance of family health history, U.S. Surgeon General Richard H. Carmona, M.D., M.P.H., in cooperation with other agencies within the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) has launched a national public health campaign, called the U.S. Surgeon General’s Family History Initiative, to encourage all American families to learn more about their family health history. In addition to the Office of the Surgeon General, other HHS agencies involved in this project include the National Human Genome Research Institute (NHGRI), the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality (AHRQ), and the Health Resources and Services Administration (HRSA). National Family History Day Surgeon General Carmona has declared Thanksgiving 2004 to be the first annual National Family History Day. Thanksgiving is the traditional start of the holiday season for most Americans. Whenever families gather, the Surgeon General encourages them to talk about, and to write down, the health problems that seem to run in their family. Learning about their family’s health history may help ensure a longer future together. My Family Health Portrait Americans know that family history is important to health. A recent survey found that 96 percent of Americans believe that knowing their family history is important. Yet, the same survey found that only one-third of Americans have ever tried to gather and write down their family’s health history. Because family health history is such a powerful screening tool, the Surgeon General has created a new computerized tool to help make it fun and easy for anyone to create a sophisticated portrait of their family’s health. This new tool, called "My Family Health Portrait" can be downloaded for free and installed on your own computer. http://hhs.gov/familyhistory/download.html The tool will help you organize your family tree and help you identify common diseases that may run in your family. When you are finished, the tool will create and print out a graphical representation of your family’s generations and the health disorders that may have moved from one generation to the next. That is a powerful tool for predicting any illnesses for which you should be checked. For information on other activities of the Office of the Surgeon General, please visit www.surgeongeneral.gov. Last updated: November 8, 2004 Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

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Question:

Marilyn Churley who is an NDP MLA (member of the legislative assembly) has a bill pushing for more disclosure in Ontario for adoptive parents and children. She is a birthmother who gave up a child for adoption in 1968. her link is http://www.marilynchurley.com/the_issues/adoption/ Doug Thomas

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It sounds great to me.  If I understand correctly both birthmother and child have the right to request no release of information that would aid in contact.  I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to privacy in this situation.  I also love that the birth parent has to give all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to explain themselves. BaD aSs Me **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!**

| Marilyn Churley who is an NDP MLA (member of the legislative assembly) has a | bill pushing for more disclosure in Ontario for adoptive parents and | children. She is a birthmother who gave up a child for adoption in 1968. | | her link is | | http://www.marilynchurley.com/the_issues/adoption/ | | Doug Thomas | |

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It sounds great to me.  If I understand correctly both birthmother and child have the right to request no release of information that would aid in contact.  I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to privacy in this situation.  I also love that the birth parent has to give all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to explain themselves. BaD aSs Me **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!**

Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have the right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other?  I think you’ll find the consensus here to be "no".  If you’d like to read some of the arguments against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have bargains to track down in the morning!) J. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | Marilyn Churley who is an NDP MLA (member of the legislative assembly) has a | bill pushing for more disclosure in Ontario for adoptive parents and | children. She is a birthmother who gave up a child for adoption in 1968. | | her link is | | http://www.marilynchurley.com/the_issues/adoption/ | | Doug Thomas | |

Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

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| | It sounds great to me.  If I understand correctly both birthmother and child | have the right to request no release of information that would aid in | contact.  I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to | privacy in this situation.  I also love that the birth parent has to give | all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to | explain themselves. | | BaD aSs Me | **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** | | Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have the | right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other?  I think you’ll find | the consensus here to be "no".  If you’d like to read some of the arguments | against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org | | Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are | inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have bargains | to track down in the morning!) | | J. | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against it but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I should not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone shouldnt have the right to not be contacted by me.  The only information I believe a bparent should be able to keep sealed is their surname, contact information, or other identifying information.  Most individuals involved appear not to want their informaiton sealed when the adoptee reaches an apropriate age. However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I believe that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is best for her (contact or no contact) at that point in her life.  She may just not be emotionally ready to meet the child or she may be in a relationship where the disclosure of an adoption could put her in physical danger.  Personally in my situation all information is available to my child however in the beginning I requested no contact at all.  I can not imagine an instance where forcing contact on the birth parent against their wishes would be benificial to anyone involved.  I feel just as strongly that my child has the right to not be contacted by me if he/she chooses.  Giving birth and relenquishing my parent control/rights does not entitle me to force myself into his/her life 18 yrs later. I know I am the minority on this one.  Not the first time. — BaD aSs Me **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** | | | | Marilyn Churley who is an NDP MLA (member of the legislative assembly) has | a | | bill pushing for more disclosure in Ontario for adoptive parents and | | children. She is a birthmother who gave up a child for adoption in 1968. | | | | her link is | | | | http://www.marilynchurley.com/the_issues/adoption/ | | | | Doug Thomas | | | | | | | | | Reply to jmhjmd at aol. | |

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | It sounds great to me. If I understand correctly both birthmother and child | have the right to request no release of information that would aid in | contact. I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to | privacy in this situation. I also love that the birth parent has to give | all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to | explain themselves. | | BaD aSs Me | **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** | Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have the | right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other? I think you’ll find | the consensus here to be "no". If you’d like to read some of the arguments | against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org | | Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are | inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have bargains | to track down in the morning!) | | J. | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against it but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I should not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone shouldnt have the right to not be contacted by me.   The only information I believe a bparent should be able to keep sealed is their surname, contact information, or other identifying information.  

That then completely stymies any adopted person who wishes to look at their wider family medical history. A couple of years ago our government  tried to overturn 25 years of adoptee right to access and 75 years of practical ability to access original birth records in England & Wales, by giving birth mothers a right of veto. The proposal was thrown out at the last minute. I can show you all of the argument presented for and against. I can show you the official and the unofficial reasons why the proposal was put forward. You won’t see a shonkier piece of governance in a very long time. What you want, effectively stops the adopted person from ever being able to know any other of his genetic family, Do you really think that a birth mother should have the moral right to stop an adopted person  from knowing all the other members of his or her family of origin? Do you really think that  the birth mothers should have a right to prevent the rest of the natural family from ever knowing the adopted person? Most individuals involved appear not to want their informaiton sealed when the adoptee reaches an apropriate age.

If you mean birtmothers, do you really honestly think that it should be up to them? However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I believe that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is best for her (contact or no contact) at that point in her life.

It is at the very core of English adoption law that the rights and interests throughout life, of the child who is to adopted are paramount.  If a mother doesn’t want contact with the child she gave up for adoption, then she should tell him so. If he can’t accept it and makes a nuisance of him/her self then we anti-harassment laws She may just not be emotionally ready to meet the child

The person seeking her is not going to be child are they? Even in Scotland where adoptees have always had a right to  access, the age at which an adopted person can have their OBC and unseal the court record is 16 years. or she may be in a relationship where the disclosure of an adoption could put her in physical danger.  

Sounds like the kind of relationship she’d want to  get out of pretty damn fast to me. Personally in my situation all information is available to my child however in the beginning I requested no contact at all.  I can not imagine an instance where forcing contact on the birth parent against their wishes would be benificial to anyone involved.  

Opening adoption records and  telling adopted people everything that is recored about there family of origin, is not tantamount to "forcing contact on the birth parent against their wishes".  How do you think that opening records "forces" contact upon anyone? I feel just as strongly that my child has the right to not be contacted by me if he/she chooses.  

That’s a completely different thing isn’t it? Most children, because they were too young, didn’t have any choices at the time of the adoption.  A child might have been adopted because of violence or neglect by his or her natural parents, never visa versa,  giving the adoptee some right of veto is in line with the principal that child’s rights and interests throughout its life are the paramount considerations in adoption. I do however think that birth parents of the adoption frenzy era of  late 1940s through to the early 1980s should be given a lot more rights than they currently have in England. Birth relatives – and that includes me as, as well as being adopted myself, I have brothers and sisters who were adopted separately – will after September 2005 be able to request an adoption support agency to trace and ascertain the wishes of an adopted person regarding contact   or sharing of non-identifying information. Even so I was able to trace all of  my siblings on my mother’s side who had been adopted, long before this new piece of law was even thought of. It is human nature for people to want to find their natural family and it is often difficult to stop them from finding each other what ever the authorities intentions may be. With DNA databases springing up all over the place and for all manner of reasons, it is likely to become more easy for even those who are not adoptees or birth parents to find close relations that they were unaware of. Giving birth and relenquishing my parent control/rights does not entitle me to force myself into his/her life 18 yrs later.

How do you believe that opening the records would give you any more "rights" to do that than you would have before. The ability to do something does not give you a *right* to do it. I know I am the minority on this one.  Not the first time.

I wonder whether that is because you haven’t really given it as much thought as you think you have? Robin

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| | | | snip | No one is permenantly | harmed or has their life put in danger by not knowing their birth family | members. | | Really.  I think some critically ill adopted persons and dead adopted | persons might have something to say about that. | | Agreed.  My brother knows from personal experience that this is bullshit. | He didn’t know that heart disease ran in his birthfamily until he had a | heart attack at age 36. | | | — | Robyn | Resident Witchypoo | #1557 | Hey, everything there is to know about my familys history, they know.  My mom is a genealogist so I would guess her records not only bulge with info but are more accurate and up to date than most. — BaD aSs Me **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!**

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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | It sounds great to me. If I understand correctly both birthmother | and | child | | | have the right to request no release of information that would aid | in | | | contact. I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to | | | privacy in this situation. I also love that the birth parent has to | give | | | all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the | option | to | | | explain themselves. | | | | | | BaD aSs Me | | | **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** | | | | | | | | | Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party | have | the | | | right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other? I think | you’ll | find | | | the consensus here to be "no". If you’d like to read some of the | arguments | | | against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org | | | | | | Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos | are | | | inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I | have | bargains | | | to track down in the morning!) | | | | | | J. | | | | | | | | | | | | | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments | against | it | | but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I | should | | not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone | shouldnt | | have the right to not be contacted by me. | | | | | | The only information I believe a bparent should be able to keep sealed | is | their surname, contact information, or other identifying information. | | | | | | | | That then completely stymies any adopted person who wishes to look at | | their wider family medical history. A couple of years ago our | | government  tried to overturn 25 years of adoptee right to access and 75 | | years of practical ability to access original birth records in England & | | Wales, by giving birth mothers a right of veto. The proposal was thrown | | out at the last minute. I can show you all of the argument presented for | | and against. I can show you the official and the unofficial reasons why | | the proposal was put forward. You won’t see a shonkier piece of | | governance in a very long time. | | | | | I believe each adoptive family and child/adult has the right to all | available (non idendifying) medical information.  My child has that. | Contact with me or access to the original birth records will add nothing. | | | | | What you want, effectively stops the adopted person from ever being able | | to know any other of his genetic family, Do you really think that a | | birth mother should have the moral right to stop an adopted person from | | knowing all the other members of his or her family of origin? Do you | | really think that  the birth mothers should have a right to prevent the | | rest of the natural family from ever knowing the adopted person? | | | Yep.  The child I gave birth to is mine.  Just like the other chldren I | have.  I do not allow my other children to visit their grandparents (on | daddys side) without him present.  They have never and will never be | allowed to spend the night, go out on trips with or otherwise be around | them.  Been | that way for 17 1/2 yrs and will be that way until they are all 18. | | You do realize that we are talking about the rights of adopted ADULTS to | their own records, don’t you?  You state that you won’t permit your kids to | visit their grandparents without your supervision until they are 18.  Well | guess what.  Records access is for othose over the age of 18. Do you think | then that adoptess need supervision as adults?  Are we more dangerous that | legos? | The records are one thing. Just beyond me why you want a birtcert if not to get informaiton to contact the bparents.  I simply want my wishess of contact or no contact made a part of any release of information.  As I would want her wishes made known to me should I access informaiton.  And as for legos…the damn things are deadly.  Having stepped on more than one of those pointy things in the middle of  the night and I all for a lego ban! | | Do I | care about their rights?  You can be sure that I dont.  Those children and | their best interests are my responsibility and I will continue to do what | I | believe is best for them and the rest of our family. | | And when they are 18 you can’t, unless you plan to bully them and get think | you can get a court order to stop them.  Given the circumstances you list | below, I understand why you do what you do, but that still doesn’t stop your | daughter when she’s an adult, if she wants to hang out with this bum and his | family. | | No I cant.  I can only make my wishes known and do what I need to do to protect myself.  If it were an adoption situaiton I would want any release of information to be accompanied by a request to not be contacted and an explanation as to why. | | No one is permenantly | harmed or has their life put in danger by not knowing their birth family | members. | | Really.  I think some critically ill adopted persons and dead adopted | persons might have something to say about that. | Ok that is a minority of people.  And in those instances it would need to handled differently.  I may put in my adoption records that I do not want contact EVEN if it is to elicit a kidney, give blood or whatever. | My parents didnt make the adoption decision, my husband didnt, my | other children didnt, I did it alone and with much thought and | consideration | as to what was best for the child, my other chldren and me.  That child | has | the right to be given everything a mother is capable of giving, which I | did | through adoption.  That child does not have the right at any point in his | or | her life to force themselves into my life if I do not wish them to.  I | gave | up all parental rights to that child, meaning I no longer either wanted to | or felt able to be the parent of the child.  At least in my case the judge | didnt say "Now are you sure you want to give up your parental role for | …oh…5 yrss?  15 yrs?  how about 20?" | | Since you signed away your parental rights, when give you the right then to | tell your adult offspring what to do. Since when does access one’s own birth | records have anything to do with forcing oneself into somebody’s life? Are | your marriage records sealed?  Your divorce records?  Your property tax | records?  This is public information. | My child was out of my control one day after birth.  Fortunately I took the time to carefully choose a family who not only shared my value system but either agreed with me or was willing to back me on aspects of the adoption and how it was to be handled with my child. | I don’t know if you realize how much "confidential" adoption is in the | public record.  In many cases it’s quite easy to do a successful search. | Courts open records for good cause; the original names and parents of | adoptees sometimes are on court records given to aparents; legal ads post | the names of bparents;  paperwork with ID information goes through a score | of hands; in some states records aren’t sealed if the aparents request they | remain open.  And the biggest of all:  records are only sealed at the time | of adoption finalization–not at relinquishment. ,  relinquishment and dTPR | is simply a legal mechanism to turn custody over to another party. | | Oh I am aware. | Nope, he made it plain that this was a permanent decision and I had no | expectations of seeing the child again, having any influence in the childs | life in any way or anyting thing else resembling a parental right or | responsibility. | | Then why do you think it’s your responsibility to keep adoptee’s public | records from them? | Not the records.  Just please add with any release of info my wishes. Maybe I want to be contacted but first by a third party Maybe I want no contact Maybe I want first contact by mail or by phone Maybe I would like some warning from the agency or third party to impending contact so I can prepare my chldren, husband, family or whoever might not know about it.  If my first child had been the one released I would not want contact at this time.  Not until my other children were 18.  How would she know that if my wishes were not made part of her recieving a bc or records or whatever. | | | | Most individuals involved appear not to want their informaiton sealed | when the adoptee reaches an apropriate age. | | | | | | | | If you mean birtmothers, do you really honestly think that it should be | | up to them? | | | Im not sure what you mean.  Up to the bmoms that the information is sealed | until a certain time and then availble?  Or at what age it should be made | available?  I can see no reason at all, from the perspective of a birth | parent and parent, that records should be available (identifying info that | is) before the age of 18.  I have made all information available for my | child to access at the appropriate time.  I will be more than happy to | meet | my child but not before 18. | | Then why are you aruging … read more »

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| | | | | As a birth parent I have been through enough heartache and pain | during the | decision to not bring my own flesh and blood home from the hospital | that day. | Unless you experienced it you cant know the non stop crying, the | doubts, the | fears, the emotional roller coaster that takes you between total joy | that your | child is loved and cared for in a way you want him to be and the lows | where | you feel like dieing. (in my case a suicide attempt followed) Why | should I | have to be forced into a situation against my will where I may have | to take | legal action against my child in the future? | | | | You’re not forced to do anything in the future.  You still wouldn’t be | forced to do anything in the future if  records were opened. Scotland | has always had open records for adopted people, the rest of Britain has | had for many years. Strangely none of the crap that you are constantly | predicting and carping on about has come to pass here since records have | been open | | | You’ve already said elsewhere you are not pro-abortion but that you are | very | much pro-choice. If you are prepared to put the child that you delivered in | to the world through the agonies of not knowing his family of origin then | your better choice might have been abortion. | | Hey, I dont know my family on my fathers side and there is no agony involved there. | | That is so cold and cruel to the person who was brave enough to not only | choose life for their child but go through 9mo of pregnancy with | people asking | ‘Hopeing for a boy or girl?’ ‘Whats its name going to be?’ ‘Uh, why | havent you | bought baby clothes yet?’  And then weeks of ‘Oh you had the baby, | where is | it? | | | And now you think that only mothers suffer as a result of adoption? | Some mothers do, some children (or adults) do and some adoptive parents do as well as all those around them.  Although most adoptions are successful with statisfying results for all involved. Especially now that people have come to view adoption as a positive alternative instead of a forced one. | | ‘ Or perhaps as is the case many times they are someone who hid the | pregnancy. | Why should that mother be put in  a situaiton to take legal action | like that? | Its cruel.  Sure would make some abort if they feel they have no | right to | privacy. | | | Why would she have to?  More than 99% of adopted people would respect her | wish for no contact.  Democracies don’t make laws to such small minorities | when the best interests of a majority will be ill served. | As long as the wishes of the birthmother to not be contacted are respected, or birthfather or adopted person or adoptive family.  I would say your right that most people would respect that. | | What is the purpose in having a document that is no longer valid? | And what | gives an adoptee the right to have it?  Heck when my daughter got her | drivers | permit earlier this year she HAD to turn over her picture ID.  It is | illegal | in this state to have two ids.  Doesnt she have a right to have it? | Its hers | isnt it?  At least that has the correct/current information on it. | | | Can I ask what the fuck does any of that have to with rights to access to | original birth certificates?  Do you understand what medical genealogy is | and you can imagine what it is like to be unable to give any other answer | than "I don’t know" to a genetic counsellor when the health of you and your | family depend on those answers.  The chicken shit health info you gave when | you relinquished, has nothing to do with what recessive gene might have | last | showed up in your great grand father’s brother. People need to know their | genetic medical history, adopted people need to know their genetic medical | history. The first step in getting that history together is obtaining your | proper birth certificate, the one that tell the truth about who gave birth | to you, and with a bit of luck who you father is. | | Ok accessing a bc has nothing to do wtih genetic information.  At least that isnt on mine!  All I am concerned with is the right of the parents -both adoptive and birth- and the adoptee to make the request and that request be made a part of any record turned over to anyone that they not be contacted or that they do wish to be contacted. | She can just say no. There is no such thing as anon. in adoption | despite what | some bottom feeder social worker or well-heeled industrial lobbyist may | claim. | | | | No, nothing does gaurantee my child wont come find me.  However I | would hope | that if he sees that the identifying information is withheld at my | request and | I have perhaps written an explaination as to my wishes that he would | have the | decency to leave me alone…even if he could find me. (This isnt how my | adoption is, just an example) | | | | So you’d be happy to see the child you gave up for adoption creep of die | somewhere rather come bothering you for any family history. What about his | other blood kin are they allowed a say in whether  he can meet them or not? | When I set to look for my family I wasn’t that fussed about finding my | mother, I wanted to meet my brothers and sisters. Do you think a birth | mother should have been able to prevent me from doing that?  I really don’t | think that you have ever thought about this except from your own entirely | selfish point of view. | Yep, my second oldest daughter has at least 2 sisters.  One in Washington, one in KY.  I have forbid her from contacting them.  If she chooses to then I will give her the information I have but will have to cut off all contact with her myself and between her and her siblings at home.  This is a safety issue for us.  I also believe that it is a safety issue for the siblings that are out there and their mothers.  There are circumstances where the benifits of conact do not away the risks it may pose to others. As for the importance of genetics…poo.  I have managed 30+yrs never knowing the first thing about the other half of my DNA origins.  There arent that many people who need the genetic profile of another and im sure those that do will find a way if at all possible. | And we are NOT children. | | | By saying child I mean no disrespect.  Are you a mother?  Well, I am | and my | kids will always be kids.  My youngest has always been will always be | called | my baby.  Ok she is well past diapers but that is her relationship to | me…not to the world.  I will try not to use child if it offends you | though. | | | Then you’d best save that for you own kids. I’m adopted, I’m 51, I don’t | appreciate the sentiment, when I have government minister who are | younger than I am referring to me as an "adopted child" and allowing | their own dubious semantics to cloud their thinking in much the way that | I suspect you are. | | I said I would try not to offend. Damn. | So you condone lies? | | | | | Yep, yes, you betcha, uh hu, si. I know ill get reamed for this one | but I have | seen to many instances where girls were forced into parenting a child | they | were not prepared for and did no parent to a level that the child | deserved. | | And that was all because adoptees can get a hold of their birth | certificates was it? | In the instance of listing a father, there are times I know that bmoms either dont list or list wrongly a father so that the adoption can go through.  Not sure what that would have to do with later getting the bcert. Other than it would be (as my daughters sort of is) innacurate or incomplete. | I mean a girl on drugs, a 12yr old, a rape victim…. simply because | stating | the fathers name would mean that he had the right to obtain custody | of the | child before an adoption could even be considered.  OR because | disclosing | their pregnancy and intentions to a parent or partner would but them | under | pressure to keep the child or loose their home.  A pretty scary | thought to | some young women/girls. | | | Yes it is, but how does it justify  "forever closed" adoption? | | Im not saying that.  I am say I support making it so that if records are accessed then the people on the other side of that are 1. notified so they can prepare and 2. given the opportunity to request no contact be made or that contact is welcomed. | | Adoption is much more acceptable today than ever before but there is | still a | social stigma for the birth mother. | | | She’d be wanting an abortion before it’s too late then. | Unfortunately most do.  Many more are aborted that adopted. It is a much easier and more acceptable way out of a problem. | | She will always face some level of pressure from family, friends, | partners, | church etc. to keep the baby. Not everyone is strong enough to face | that kind | of pressure.  I know many women who have went through with their | pregnancys | and adoptions only because I helped them access services that helped | them keep | it a secret. | | Are living in one of those states that is run by bunch of religious | arseholes who think that it’s still 1954 | | Why should a woman not have the right to privacy when it comes to HER pregnancy and HER decision to release for adoption?  If a girl/woman doesnt wnt to face the pressures, questions, accusations, and false information out there then why shouldnt she be allowed to keep her decision to herself.  It isnt my moms, my neighbors, my bosses, my kids or anyone elses business if im pregnant and if I choose adoption. | Again my little ray of sunshine, what the fuck does any of that have to | do … read more »

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – It sounds great to me.  If I understand correctly both birthmother and child have the right to request no release of information that would aid in contact.  I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to privacy in this situation.  I also love that the birth parent has to give all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to explain themselves. BaD aSs Me **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have the right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other?  I think you’ll find the consensus here to be "no".  If you’d like to read some of the arguments against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have bargains to track down in the morning!) J. It’s a bad bill and we’ll be working to kills this sucker. Marley Which?  The Churley bill?  I’d like to see the bill passed.  But, then, there’s no real political will to address adoption reform in Ontario, and I suspect the bill will die its own death without the assistance of Bastard Nation. Tom

Yeah, the bill.  Anything with a veto is unacceptable. Marley

Response:

| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | It sounds great to me. If I understand correctly both birthmother | and | | child | | | have the right to request no release of information that would aid | in | | | contact. I think that is the best way to respect every ones right | to | | | privacy in this situation. I also love that the birth parent has to | | give | | | all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the | option | | to | | | explain themselves. | | | | | | BaD aSs Me | | | **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am | right!** | | | | | | | Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party | have | | the | | | right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other? I think | you’ll | | find | | | the consensus here to be "no". If you’d like to read some of the | | arguments | | | against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org | | | | | | Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos | are | | | inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I | have | | bargains | | | to track down in the morning!) | | | | | | J. | | | | | | | | | | | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments | against | | it but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why | I | | should not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why | someone | | shouldnt have the right to not be contacted by me. | | | | Bparents can say no just like anybody else. If someone persists in | bothering | | you there are legal remedies such as TROs and torts. | | As a birth parent I have been through enough heartache and pain during the | decision to not bring my own flesh and blood home from the hospital that | day.  Unless you experienced it you cant know the non stop crying, the | doubts, the fears, the emotional roller coaster that takes you between | total | joy that your child is loved and cared for in a way you want him to be and | the lows where you feel like dieing. (in my case a suicide attempt | followed) | | This is iall very tragic and I don’t doubt any of it. | | Why should I have to be forced into a situation against my will where I | may | have to take legal action against my child in the future?  That is so cold | and cruel to the person who was brave enough to not only choose life for | their child but go through 9mo of pregnancy with people asking ‘Hopeing | for | a boy or girl?’ ‘Whats its name going to be?’ ‘Uh, why havent you bought | baby clothes yet?’  And then weeks of ‘Oh you had the baby, where is it?’ | Or perhaps as is the case many times they are someone who hid the | pregnancy. | Why should that mother be put in  a situaiton to take legal action like | that?  Its cruel.  Sure would make some abort if they feel they have no | right to privacy. | | Legal action is only necessary if somebody harasses you. I’ve never known | one single adopted person who has had legal action filed against them. | Contacting somebody–anybody–is not illegal.  If it were, we wouldn’t have | phone books. | | | | | | | The only information I believe a bparent should be able to keep sealed | is | | their surname, contact information, or other identifying information. | | | | Why?  Access to one’s original birth certiface is not about reunion, | which | a | | personal relationship matter.  It’s about the right to access your own | | publicly held records.  Why should adoptees be set aside? | | | What is the purpose in having a document that is no longer valid?  And | what | gives an adoptee the right to have it?  Heck when my daughter got her | drivers permit earlier this year she HAD to turn over her picture ID. It | is | illegal in this state to have two ids.  Doesnt she have a right to have | it? | Its hers isnt it?  At least that has the correct/current information on | it. | | Hmmm, a birth certificate is always valid,  An obc is the original document. | The abc is a a state-sponsored forgery. Read the Sundquist decision.  A | birth is both a public and a private event and no parent has the right of | anon. from their own offspring. | I will accept what you say since I am sure you are better informed about it than I am.  In my case a birth certificate might be a bit dissapointing since my child wasnt even named until her adoption at 2mo of age.  The father listed is not the bio-father and the only real information there is my name. | | | knowing the adopted person? | | | | cut | | | | However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I | | believe that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is | best | | for her (contact or no contact) at that point in her life. | | | | She can just say no. There is no such thing as anon. in adoption despite | | what some bottom feeder social worker or well-heeled industrial lobbyist | | may claim. | | | | | No, nothing does gaurantee my child wont come find me.  However I would | hope | that if he sees that the identifying information is withheld at my request | and I have perhaps written an explaination as to my wishes that he would | have the decency to leave me alone…even if he could find me. | (This isnt how my adoption is, just an example) | | That is not the same as a veto.  A Contact Preference Form which can be | filled out in Oregon, Alabama and New Hampshire does not keep the adopted | person from receiving their obc.  It simply states a contract preference | should a bparent choose to file one.  A veto…well keeps the adopted person | from receiving the document. | I still believe that in situations where the mother could face abuse or other serious ill affects if contacted by the adoptee then it should be with held.  I suppose otherwise theres no harm in releasing it as long as a statement of intent is included from the bparents (both if applicable) saying whether or not they want contact. I would hope that most would accept their wishes and honor them. | | | | It is at the very core of English adoption law that the rights and | | interests throughout life, of the child who is to adopted are | paramount. | | If a mother doesn’t want contact with the child she gave up for | adoption, | | then she should tell him so. If he can’t accept it and makes a | nuisance | of | | him/her self then we anti-harassment laws | | | | | | She may just not be emotionally ready to meet the child | | | | .And we are NOT children.  And she can alway say no. | | | | | By saying child I mean no disrespect.  Are you a mother?  Well, I am and | my | kids will always be kids.  My youngest has always been will always be | called | my baby.  Ok she is well past diapers but that is her relationship to | me…not to the world.  I will try not to use child if it offends you | though. | | Since Robin’s a guy, I don’t think he’s a mother, but I’m a woman and I’m | not a mother. God forbid! | | Oops!  Sorry.  Ok, maybe its a mommy thing then.  Or a me thing? | | | | | | | | or she may be in a relationship where the disclosure of an adoption | could | | put her in physical danger. | | | | So you condone lies? | | | Yep, yes, you betcha, uh hu, si. | I know ill get reamed for this one but I have seen to many instances where | girls were forced into parenting a child they were not prepared for and | did | no parent to a level that the child deserved.  I mean a girl on drugs, a | 12yr old, a rape victim…. | simply because stating the fathers name would mean that he had the right | to | obtain custody of the child before an adoption could even be considered. | OR | because disclosing their pregnancy and intentions to a parent or partner | would but them under pressure to keep the child or loose their home.  A | pretty scary thought to some young women/girls.  Adoption is much more | acceptable today than ever before but there is still a social stigma for | the | birth mother.  She will always face some level of pressure from family, | friends, partners, church etc. to keep the baby. Not everyone is strong | enough to face that kind of pressure.  I know many women who have went | through with their pregnancys and adoptions only because I helped them | access services that helped them keep it a secret. | | Then they should get abortions. | IMO abortion is never in the best interest of the child. | | | | Personally in my situation all information is available to my child | | however in the beginning I requested no contact at all.  I can not | imagine | | an instance where forcing contact on the birth parent against their | wishes | | would be benificial to anyone involved. | | | | Who says it’s about contact.  Unfortunatey, under the sealed records | system | | contact is the only way people can secure the right of identity and | their | | own histories. | … read more »

Response:

    As a birth parent I have been through enough heartache and pain during the   decision to not bring my own flesh and blood home from the hospital that day.   Unless you experienced it you cant know the non stop crying, the doubts, the   fears, the emotional roller coaster that takes you between total joy that your   child is loved and cared for in a way you want him to be and the lows where   you feel like dieing. (in my case a suicide attempt followed) Why should I   have to be forced into a situation against my will where I may have to take   legal action against my child in the future?   You’re not forced to do anything in the future.  You still wouldn’t be forced to do anything in the future if  records were opened. Scotland has always had open records for adopted people, the rest of Britain has had for many years. Strangely none of the crap that you are constantly   predicting and carping on about has come to pass here since records have been open You’ve already said elsewhere you are not pro-abortion but that you are very much pro-choice. If you are prepared to put the child that you delivered in to the world through the agonies of not knowing his family of origin then your better choice might have been abortion.   That is so cold and cruel to the person who was brave enough to not only   choose life for their child but go through 9mo of pregnancy with people asking   ‘Hopeing for a boy or girl?’ ‘Whats its name going to be?’ ‘Uh, why havent you   bought baby clothes yet?’  And then weeks of ‘Oh you had the baby, where is   it?   And now you think that only mothers suffer as a result of adoption?   ‘ Or perhaps as is the case many times they are someone who hid the pregnancy.   Why should that mother be put in  a situaiton to take legal action like that?   Its cruel.  Sure would make some abort if they feel they have no right to   privacy.   Why would she have to?  More than 99% of adopted people would respect her wish for no contact.  Democracies don’t make laws to such small minorities when the best interests of a majority will be ill served.   What is the purpose in having a document that is no longer valid?   And what   gives an adoptee the right to have it?  Heck when my daughter got her drivers   permit earlier this year she HAD to turn over her picture ID.  It is illegal   in this state to have two ids.  Doesnt she have a right to have it? Its hers   isnt it?  At least that has the correct/current information on it.   Can I ask what the fuck does any of that have to with rights to access to original birth certificates?  Do you understand what medical genealogy is and you can imagine what it is like to be unable to give any other answer than "I don’t know" to a genetic counsellor when the health of you and your family depend on those answers.  The chicken shit health info you gave when you relinquished, has nothing to do with what recessive gene might have last showed up in your great grand father’s brother. People need to know their genetic medical history, adopted people need to know their genetic medical history. The first step in getting that history together is obtaining your proper birth certificate, the one that tell the truth about who gave birth to you, and with a bit of luck who you father is.   She can just say no. There is no such thing as anon. in adoption despite what   some bottom feeder social worker or well-heeled industrial lobbyist may   claim.     No, nothing does gaurantee my child wont come find me.  However I would hope   that if he sees that the identifying information is withheld at my request and   I have perhaps written an explaination as to my wishes that he would have the   decency to leave me alone…even if he could find me. (This isnt how my   adoption is, just an example)   So you’d be happy to see the child you gave up for adoption creep of die somewhere rather come bothering you for any family history. What about his other blood kin are they allowed a say in whether  he can meet them or not? When I set to look for my family I wasn’t that fussed about finding my mother, I wanted to meet my brothers and sisters. Do you think a birth mother should have been able to prevent me from doing that?  I really don’t think that you have ever thought about this except from your own entirely selfish point of view.   And we are NOT children.     By saying child I mean no disrespect.  Are you a mother?  Well, I am and my   kids will always be kids.  My youngest has always been will always be called   my baby.  Ok she is well past diapers but that is her relationship to   me…not to the world.  I will try not to use child if it offends you   though. Then you’d best save that for you own kids. I’m adopted, I’m 51, I don’t appreciate the sentiment, when I have government minister who are younger than I am referring to me as an "adopted child" and allowing their own dubious semantics to cloud their thinking in much the way that I suspect you are.   So you condone lies?   |   Yep, yes, you betcha, uh hu, si. I know ill get reamed for this one but I have   seen to many instances where girls were forced into parenting a child they   were not prepared for and did no parent to a level that the child deserved. And that was all because adoptees can get a hold of their birth certificates was it?   I mean a girl on drugs, a 12yr old, a rape victim…. simply because stating   the fathers name would mean that he had the right to obtain custody of the   child before an adoption could even be considered.  OR because disclosing   their pregnancy and intentions to a parent or partner would but them under   pressure to keep the child or loose their home.  A pretty scary thought to   some young women/girls. Yes it is, but how does it justify  "forever closed" adoption?   Adoption is much more acceptable today than ever before but there is still a   social stigma for the birth mother. She’d be wanting an abortion before it’s too late then.   She will always face some level of pressure from family, friends, partners,   church etc. to keep the baby. Not everyone is strong enough to face that kind   of pressure.  I know many women who have went through with their pregnancys   and adoptions only because I helped them access services that helped them keep   it a secret. Are living in one of those states that is run by bunch of religious arseholes who think that it’s still 1954 Again my little ray of sunshine, what the fuck does any of that have to do with adult adoptees and birth parent’s rights and needs to decide amongst themselves whether or not they want contact with each other.   Who says it’s about contact.  Unfortunatey, under the sealed records system   contact is the only way people can secure the right of identity and their own   histories.   My childs history has nothing to do with me. Really is that  right,? So if he or she has inherited  some disease that neither or he/she or you yet know about  from your side of the family that’s nothing to do with you, even if you become cognisant of it?   I knew her for 9mo and 1 day. I say her once.  Our history together includes   some ultrasounds, one birth, a bottle of water she wouldnt drink and a quick   good-bye through the nursery window the next morning.  Her real history is   what she is building right now with her family. Her (or his) real history is every strand of DNA in every cell in his her body a half of that comes from you got a quarter of it from your mum and a quarter of it from your dad they each got an eighth of it from each of their parents. Any sons and daughters or grand sons and daughters of any of those those people and any of their brothers and sisters all share a part of their genetic with your  relinquished child as of course do the children that you have kept. Btw just as an aside, when did you graduate from the Ms Scarlrett West academy of  spelling, grammar and punctuation?  I find your diatribes even more difficult to read than hers, would a little bit of effort  be too much to ask? Robin

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – It sounds great to me.  If I understand correctly both birthmother and child have the right to request no release of information that would aid in contact.  I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to privacy in this situation.  I also love that the birth parent has to give all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to explain themselves. BaD aSs Me **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have the right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other?  I think you’ll find the consensus here to be "no".  If you’d like to read some of the arguments against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have bargains to track down in the morning!) J. It’s a bad bill and we’ll be working to kills this sucker. Marley

Which?  The Churley bill?  I’d like to see the bill passed.  But, then, there’s no real political will to address adoption reform in Ontario, and I suspect the bill will die its own death without the assistance of Bastard Nation. Tom

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against it | but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I should | not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone shouldnt | have the right to not be contacted by me. | | You have as much right as everyone else in this country to say "go away" if | contacted. | And should have the right to say I dont want to be contacted in the first place!

No more than the rest of the citizens of this country.  What makes you special? A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!" —–Unknown

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | | | | | | | It sounds great to me. If I understand correctly both birthmother and | child | | have the right to request no release of information that would aid in | | contact. I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to | | privacy in this situation. I also love that the birth parent has to | give | | all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option | to | | explain themselves. | | | | BaD aSs Me | | **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** | | | | Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have | the | | right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other? I think you’ll | find | | the consensus here to be "no". If you’d like to read some of the | arguments | | against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org | | | | Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are | | inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have | bargains | | to track down in the morning!) | | | | J. | | | | | | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against | it but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I | should not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone | shouldnt have the right to not be contacted by me. | | Bparents can say no just like anybody else. If someone persists in bothering | you there are legal remedies such as TROs and torts. As a birth parent I have been through enough heartache and pain during the decision to not bring my own flesh and blood home from the hospital that day.  Unless you experienced it you cant know the non stop crying, the doubts, the fears, the emotional roller coaster that takes you between total joy that your child is loved and cared for in a way you want him to be and the lows where you feel like dieing. (in my case a suicide attempt followed)

This is iall very tragic and I don’t doubt any of it. Why should I have to be forced into a situation against my will where I may have to take legal action against my child in the future?  That is so cold and cruel to the person who was brave enough to not only choose life for their child but go through 9mo of pregnancy with people asking ‘Hopeing for a boy or girl?’ ‘Whats its name going to be?’ ‘Uh, why havent you bought baby clothes yet?’  And then weeks of ‘Oh you had the baby, where is it?’ Or perhaps as is the case many times they are someone who hid the pregnancy. Why should that mother be put in  a situaiton to take legal action like that?  Its cruel.  Sure would make some abort if they feel they have no right to privacy.

Legal action is only necessary if somebody harasses you. I’ve never known one single adopted person who has had legal action filed against them. Contacting somebody–anybody–is not illegal.  If it were, we wouldn’t have phone books. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | | The only information I believe a bparent should be able to keep sealed is | their surname, contact information, or other identifying information. | | Why?  Access to one’s original birth certiface is not about reunion, which a | personal relationship matter.  It’s about the right to access your own | publicly held records.  Why should adoptees be set aside? | What is the purpose in having a document that is no longer valid?  And what gives an adoptee the right to have it?  Heck when my daughter got her drivers permit earlier this year she HAD to turn over her picture ID.  It is illegal in this state to have two ids.  Doesnt she have a right to have it? Its hers isnt it?  At least that has the correct/current information on it.

Hmmm, a birth certificate is always valid,  An obc is the original document. The abc is a a state-sponsored forgery. Read the Sundquist decision.  A birth is both a public and a private event and no parent has the right of anon. from their own offspring. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | knowing the adopted person? | | cut | | However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I | believe that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is best | for her (contact or no contact) at that point in her life. | | She can just say no. There is no such thing as anon. in adoption despite | what some bottom feeder social worker or well-heeled industrial lobbyist | may claim. | | No, nothing does gaurantee my child wont come find me.  However I would hope that if he sees that the identifying information is withheld at my request and I have perhaps written an explaination as to my wishes that he would have the decency to leave me alone…even if he could find me. (This isnt how my adoption is, just an example)

That is not the same as a veto.  A Contact Preference Form which can be filled out in Oregon, Alabama and New Hampshire does not keep the adopted person from receiving their obc.  It simply states a contract preference should a bparent choose to file one.  A veto…well keeps the adopted person from receiving the document. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | It is at the very core of English adoption law that the rights and | interests throughout life, of the child who is to adopted are paramount. | If a mother doesn’t want contact with the child she gave up for adoption, | then she should tell him so. If he can’t accept it and makes a nuisance of | him/her self then we anti-harassment laws | | | She may just not be emotionally ready to meet the child | | .And we are NOT children.  And she can alway say no. | | By saying child I mean no disrespect.  Are you a mother?  Well, I am and my kids will always be kids.  My youngest has always been will always be called my baby.  Ok she is well past diapers but that is her relationship to me…not to the world.  I will try not to use child if it offends you though.

Since Robin’s a guy, I don’t think he’s a mother, but I’m a woman and I’m not a mother. God forbid! – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | | | or she may be in a relationship where the disclosure of an adoption could | put her in physical danger. | | So you condone lies? | Yep, yes, you betcha, uh hu, si. I know ill get reamed for this one but I have seen to many instances where girls were forced into parenting a child they were not prepared for and did no parent to a level that the child deserved.  I mean a girl on drugs, a 12yr old, a rape victim…. simply because stating the fathers name would mean that he had the right to obtain custody of the child before an adoption could even be considered. OR because disclosing their pregnancy and intentions to a parent or partner would but them under pressure to keep the child or loose their home.  A pretty scary thought to some young women/girls.  Adoption is much more acceptable today than ever before but there is still a social stigma for the birth mother.  She will always face some level of pressure from family, friends, partners, church etc. to keep the baby. Not everyone is strong enough to face that kind of pressure.  I know many women who have went through with their pregnancys and adoptions only because I helped them access services that helped them keep it a secret.

Then they should get abortions. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | Personally in my situation all information is available to my child | however in the beginning I requested no contact at all.  I can not imagine | an instance where forcing contact on the birth parent against their wishes | would be benificial to anyone involved. | | Who says it’s about contact.  Unfortunatey, under the sealed records system | contact is the only way people can secure the right of identity and their | own histories. | | My childs history has nothing to do with me.  I knew her for 9mo and 1 day. I say her once.  Our history together includes some ultrasounds, one birth, a bottle of water she wouldnt drink and a quick good-bye through the nursery window the next morning.  Her real history is what she is building right now with her family.

Your child is not a clean state.  She had a history before she was adopted. She had a family before she was adopted. She has another whole family outside of her adoptive family.  I got my records–which were open–24 years ago.  I went from being an only child to having 5 brothers and 1 sister and a gazillion nephews, nieces, cousins, step parents, step, half and adotped relatives, etc. | I feel just as strongly that my child has the right to not be contacted by | me if he/she chooses. | | Again there is no right to not be contacted.

Marley – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | | | Giving birth and relenquishing my parent control/rights does not entitle | me to force myself into his/her life 18 yrs later. | | Contact does not equal force. | | Marley | | |

Response:

snip No one is permenantly harmed or has their life put in danger by not knowing their birth family members. Really.  I think some critically ill adopted persons and dead adopted persons might have something to say about that.

Agreed.  My brother knows from personal experience that this is bullshit. He didn’t know that heart disease ran in his birthfamily until he had a heart attack at age 36. — Robyn Resident Witchypoo #1557

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | | | | | | | | It sounds great to me. If I understand correctly both birthmother and child | | have the right to request no release of information that would aid in | | contact. I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to | | privacy in this situation. I also love that the birth parent has to give | | all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to | | explain themselves. | | | | BaD aSs Me | | **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** | | | | | Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have the | | right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other? I think you’ll find | | the consensus here to be "no". If you’d like to read some of the arguments | | against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org | | | | Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are | | inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have bargains | | to track down in the morning!) | | | | J. | | | | | | | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against it | but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I should | not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone shouldnt | have the right to not be contacted by me. | | | The only information I believe a bparent should be able to keep sealed is their surname, contact information, or other identifying information. | | | | That then completely stymies any adopted person who wishes to look at | their wider family medical history. A couple of years ago our | government  tried to overturn 25 years of adoptee right to access and 75 | years of practical ability to access original birth records in England & | Wales, by giving birth mothers a right of veto. The proposal was thrown | out at the last minute. I can show you all of the argument presented for | and against. I can show you the official and the unofficial reasons why | the proposal was put forward. You won’t see a shonkier piece of | governance in a very long time. | | I believe each adoptive family and child/adult has the right to all available (non idendifying) medical information.  My child has that. Contact with me or access to the original birth records will add nothing. | | What you want, effectively stops the adopted person from ever being able | to know any other of his genetic family, Do you really think that a | birth mother should have the moral right to stop an adopted person  from | knowing all the other members of his or her family of origin? Do you | really think that  the birth mothers should have a right to prevent the | rest of the natural family from ever knowing the adopted person? | Yep.  The child I gave birth to is mine.  Just like the other chldren I have.  I do not allow my other children to visit their grandparents (on daddys side) without him present.  They have never and will never be allowed to spend the night, go out on trips with or otherwise be around them.  Been that way for 17 1/2 yrs and will be that way until they are all 18.

You do realize that we are talking about the rights of adopted ADULTS to their own records, don’t you?  You state that you won’t permit your kids to visit their grandparents without your supervision until they are 18.  Well guess what.  Records access is for othose over the age of 18. Do you think then that adoptess need supervision as adults?  Are we more dangerous that legos? Do I care about their rights?  You can be sure that I dont.  Those children and their best interests are my responsibility and I will continue to do what I believe is best for them and the rest of our family.

And when they are 18 you can’t, unless you plan to bully them and get think you can get a court order to stop them.  Given the circumstances you list below, I understand why you do what you do, but that still doesn’t stop your daughter when she’s an adult, if she wants to hang out with this bum and his family. No one is permenantly harmed or has their life put in danger by not knowing their birth family members.

Really.  I think some critically ill adopted persons and dead adopted persons might have something to say about that.  My parents didnt make the adoption decision, my husband didnt, my other children didnt, I did it alone and with much thought and consideration as to what was best for the child, my other chldren and me.  That child has the right to be given everything a mother is capable of giving, which I did through adoption.  That child does not have the right at any point in his or her life to force themselves into my life if I do not wish them to.  I gave up all parental rights to that child, meaning I no longer either wanted to or felt able to be the parent of the child.  At least in my case the judge didnt say "Now are you sure you want to give up your parental role for …oh…5 yrss?  15 yrs?  how about 20?"

Since you signed away your parental rights, when give you the right then to tell your adult offspring what to do. Since when does access one’s own birth records have anything to do with forcing oneself into somebody’s life?  Are your marriage records sealed?  Your divorce records?  Your property tax records?  This is public information. I don’t know if you realize how much "confidential" adoption is in the public record.  In many cases it’s quite easy to do a successful search. Courts open records for good cause; the original names and parents of adoptees sometimes are on court records given to aparents; legal ads post the names of bparents;  paperwork with ID information goes through a score of hands; in some states records aren’t sealed if the aparents request they remain open.  And the biggest of all:  records are only sealed at the time of adoption finalization–not at relinquishment. ,  relinquishment and dTPR is simply a legal mechanism to turn custody over to another party. Nope, he made it plain that this was a permanent decision and I had no expectations of seeing the child again, having any influence in the childs life in any way or anyting thing else resembling a parental right or responsibility.

Then why do you think it’s your responsibility to keep adoptee’s public records from them? – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | Most individuals involved appear not to want their informaiton sealed when the adoptee reaches an apropriate age. | | | | If you mean birtmothers, do you really honestly think that it should be | up to them? | Im not sure what you mean.  Up to the bmoms that the information is sealed until a certain time and then availble?  Or at what age it should be made available?  I can see no reason at all, from the perspective of a birth parent and parent, that records should be available (identifying info that is) before the age of 18.  I have made all information available for my child to access at the appropriate time.  I will be more than happy to meet my child but not before 18.

Then why are you aruging against open records? | | However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I believe | that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is best for her | (contact or no contact) at that point in her life.

She can say go away.  That’s it.  Don’t you tell that to salespersons, creepy neighbors, and streecorner evangelists? | | | | It is at the very core of English adoption law that the rights and | interests throughout life, of the child who is to adopted are | paramount.  If a mother doesn’t want contact with the child she gave up | for adoption, then she should tell him so. If he can’t accept it and | makes a nuisance of him/her self then we anti-harassment laws | She tells him so by requesting that her information be withheld permenantly. Cant be much plainer than that.

How does one adult have the right to seal the birth record of another adult? This cannot be done in any other scenario.  Are bmothers special? | | She may just not be emotionally ready to meet the child

She’s had  18 or more years to deal with it. | | | | The person seeking her is not going to be child are they? Even in | Scotland where adoptees have always had a right to  access, the age at | which an adopted person can have their OBC and unseal the court record | is 16 years. | | Whatever age it is a child in the sense it is her child.  There are people who may never be ready to meet their adult adopted child.

We are adults. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | or she may be in a relationship where the disclosure of an adoption could put her in physical danger. | | | | Sounds like the kind of relationship she’d want to  get out of pretty | damn fast to me. | | You must be very naive about the nature of abusive relationships.  Leaving is not that easy in many instances and may even cause the woman to be killed.  In the city I live in there is no access to spouse abuse shelters, spouse abuse counselling, or any other support system for a woman needing/wanting to leave.  I dont live in a huge town but definately not a tiny hick town either.  In fact a little over a year ago within a 3 week period two women were murdered by x’s.  One in walmart and one at the home

… read more »

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against it | but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I should | not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone shouldnt | have the right to not be contacted by me. | | You have as much right as everyone else in this country to say "go away" if | contacted. | And should have the right to say I dont want to be contacted in the first place!

Well, yes, you do – However, that doesn’t mean that you’re daughter/son won’t do so anyway.  While there’s wasn’t a letter in my adoption file say that my bmom specifically DIDN’T want contact, if she had wanted it, she could have put in a letter stating just that.  And, even though I was pretty sure she didn’t want to be found, I did it anyway.  Life’s too short to avoid some things. snip Yep it takes so much more guts to kill it than go through the pregnancy and give your child a life and family.  I believe in taking responsibility for my choices.  I screwed up and got pregnant outside of marriage relationship and in a situation where I could not and the father should not raise a child.  I could have escaped my responsibility and put the consequences on the child and sentence it to death but I just dont believe that way.  I caused the situation and I will take care of it without cause undo harm or pain on others.  Abortion is nothing but an easy way to hide something you are ashamed of, getting pregnant, having sex, etc. Adoption may be the tough way but it is the way to deal with..getting preg. etc..

Maybe it was "the" way for you to deal with it, but many others feel differently. — Robyn Resident Witchypoo #1557

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against it | but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I should | not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone shouldnt | have the right to not be contacted by me. | | You have as much right as everyone else in this country to say "go away" if | contacted. | And should have the right to say I dont want to be contacted in the first place! | However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I believe | that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is best for her | (contact or no contact) at that point in her life. | | Then she probably should have had an abortion. | Yep it takes so much more guts to kill it than go through the pregnancy and give your child a life and family.  I believe in taking responsibility for my choices.  I screwed up and got pregnant outside of marriage relationship and in a situation where I could not and the father should not raise a child.  I could have escaped my responsibility and put the consequences on the child and sentence it to death but I just dont believe that way.  I caused the situation and I will take care of it without cause undo harm or pain on others.  Abortion is nothing but an easy way to hide something you are ashamed of, getting pregnant, having sex, etc. Adoption may be the tough way but it is the way to deal with..getting preg. etc..

Good grief!  Abortion is about not wanting to be pregnant.  It’s not about hiding anything. Abortion is God’s gift to women. Marley – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

Response:

| | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against it | but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I should | not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone shouldnt | have the right to not be contacted by me. | | You have as much right as everyone else in this country to say "go away" if | contacted. | And should have the right to say I dont want to be contacted in the first place! | However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I believe | that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is best for her | (contact or no contact) at that point in her life. | | Then she probably should have had an abortion. | Yep it takes so much more guts to kill it than go through the pregnancy and give your child a life and family.  I believe in taking responsibility for my choices.  I screwed up and got pregnant outside of marriage relationship and in a situation where I could not and the father should not raise a child.  I could have escaped my responsibility and put the consequences on the child and sentence it to death but I just dont believe that way.  I caused the situation and I will take care of it without cause undo harm or pain on others.  Abortion is nothing but an easy way to hide something you are ashamed of, getting pregnant, having sex, etc. Adoption may be the tough way but it is the way to deal with..getting preg. etc..

Response:

| | It sounds great to me.  If I understand correctly both birthmother and child | have the right to request no release of information that would aid in | contact.  I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to | privacy in this situation.  I also love that the birth parent has to give | all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to | explain themselves. | | BaD aSs Me | **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** | | Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have the | right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other?  I think you’ll find | the consensus here to be "no".  If you’d like to read some of the arguments | against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org | | Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are | inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have bargains | to track down in the morning!) | | J. | Hope you found some good bargains!  I have never been into the day after shopping thing but my MIL and SIL are crazy about it.  All day Thanksgiving is spend ad looking, coupon clipping and list making.  Myself I am the one who is out on Christmas Eve.. it used to just happen that way but now hubby and I plan it that way, kind of our tradition.  We dont begin shopping at all until then. Anyway, hope you have a great time and get some great deals! | | | | Marilyn Churley who is an NDP MLA (member of the legislative assembly) has | a | | bill pushing for more disclosure in Ontario for adoptive parents and | | children. She is a birthmother who gave up a child for adoption in 1968. | | | | her link is | | | | http://www.marilynchurley.com/the_issues/adoption/ | | | | Doug Thomas | | | | | | | | | Reply to jmhjmd at aol. | |

Response:

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| | | | | | It sounds great to me. If I understand correctly both birthmother and | child | | have the right to request no release of information that would aid in | | contact. I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to | | privacy in this situation. I also love that the birth parent has to | give | | all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option | to | | explain themselves. | | | | BaD aSs Me | | **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** | | | | Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have | the | | right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other? I think you’ll | find | | the consensus here to be "no". If you’d like to read some of the | arguments | | against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org | | | | Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are | | inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have | bargains | | to track down in the morning!) | | | | J. | | | | | | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against | it but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I | should not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone | shouldnt have the right to not be contacted by me. | | Bparents can say no just like anybody else. If someone persists in bothering | you there are legal remedies such as TROs and torts. As a birth parent I have been through enough heartache and pain during the decision to not bring my own flesh and blood home from the hospital that day.  Unless you experienced it you cant know the non stop crying, the doubts, the fears, the emotional roller coaster that takes you between total joy that your child is loved and cared for in a way you want him to be and the lows where you feel like dieing. (in my case a suicide attempt followed) Why should I have to be forced into a situation against my will where I may have to take legal action against my child in the future?  That is so cold and cruel to the person who was brave enough to not only choose life for their child but go through 9mo of pregnancy with people asking ‘Hopeing for a boy or girl?’ ‘Whats its name going to be?’ ‘Uh, why havent you bought baby clothes yet?’  And then weeks of ‘Oh you had the baby, where is it?’ Or perhaps as is the case many times they are someone who hid the pregnancy. Why should that mother be put in  a situaiton to take legal action like that?  Its cruel.  Sure would make some abort if they feel they have no right to privacy. | | | The only information I believe a bparent should be able to keep sealed is | their surname, contact information, or other identifying information. | | Why?  Access to one’s original birth certiface is not about reunion, which a | personal relationship matter.  It’s about the right to access your own | publicly held records.  Why should adoptees be set aside? | What is the purpose in having a document that is no longer valid?  And what gives an adoptee the right to have it?  Heck when my daughter got her drivers permit earlier this year she HAD to turn over her picture ID.  It is illegal in this state to have two ids.  Doesnt she have a right to have it? Its hers isnt it?  At least that has the correct/current information on it. | knowing the adopted person? | | cut | | However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I | believe that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is best | for her (contact or no contact) at that point in her life. | | She can just say no. There is no such thing as anon. in adoption despite | what some bottom feeder social worker or well-heeled industrial lobbyist | may claim. | | No, nothing does gaurantee my child wont come find me.  However I would hope that if he sees that the identifying information is withheld at my request and I have perhaps written an explaination as to my wishes that he would have the decency to leave me alone…even if he could find me. (This isnt how my adoption is, just an example) | | It is at the very core of English adoption law that the rights and | interests throughout life, of the child who is to adopted are paramount. | If a mother doesn’t want contact with the child she gave up for adoption, | then she should tell him so. If he can’t accept it and makes a nuisance of | him/her self then we anti-harassment laws | | | She may just not be emotionally ready to meet the child | | .And we are NOT children.  And she can alway say no. | | By saying child I mean no disrespect.  Are you a mother?  Well, I am and my kids will always be kids.  My youngest has always been will always be called my baby.  Ok she is well past diapers but that is her relationship to me…not to the world.  I will try not to use child if it offends you though. | | | | or she may be in a relationship where the disclosure of an adoption could | put her in physical danger. | | So you condone lies? | Yep, yes, you betcha, uh hu, si. I know ill get reamed for this one but I have seen to many instances where girls were forced into parenting a child they were not prepared for and did no parent to a level that the child deserved.  I mean a girl on drugs, a 12yr old, a rape victim…. simply because stating the fathers name would mean that he had the right to obtain custody of the child before an adoption could even be considered.  OR because disclosing their pregnancy and intentions to a parent or partner would but them under pressure to keep the child or loose their home.  A pretty scary thought to some young women/girls.  Adoption is much more acceptable today than ever before but there is still a social stigma for the birth mother.  She will always face some level of pressure from family, friends, partners, church etc. to keep the baby. Not everyone is strong enough to face that kind of pressure.  I know many women who have went through with their pregnancys and adoptions only because I helped them access services that helped them keep it a secret. | | Personally in my situation all information is available to my child | however in the beginning I requested no contact at all.  I can not imagine | an instance where forcing contact on the birth parent against their wishes | would be benificial to anyone involved. | | Who says it’s about contact.  Unfortunatey, under the sealed records system | contact is the only way people can secure the right of identity and their | own histories. | | My childs history has nothing to do with me.  I knew her for 9mo and 1 day. I say her once.  Our history together includes some ultrasounds, one birth, a bottle of water she wouldnt drink and a quick good-bye through the nursery window the next morning.  Her real history is what she is building right now with her family. | I feel just as strongly that my child has the right to not be contacted by | me if he/she chooses. | | Again there is no right to not be contacted. | | | | Giving birth and relenquishing my parent control/rights does not entitle | me to force myself into his/her life 18 yrs later. | | Contact does not equal force. | | Marley | | |

Response:

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| | | | | | | | It sounds great to me. If I understand correctly both birthmother and child | | have the right to request no release of information that would aid in | | contact. I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to | | privacy in this situation. I also love that the birth parent has to give | | all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to | | explain themselves. | | | | BaD aSs Me | | **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** | | | | | Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have the | | right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other? I think you’ll find | | the consensus here to be "no". If you’d like to read some of the arguments | | against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org | | | | Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are | | inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have bargains | | to track down in the morning!) | | | | J. | | | | | | | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against it | but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I should | not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone shouldnt | have the right to not be contacted by me. | | | The only information I believe a bparent should be able to keep sealed is their surname, contact information, or other identifying information. | | | | That then completely stymies any adopted person who wishes to look at | their wider family medical history. A couple of years ago our | government  tried to overturn 25 years of adoptee right to access and 75 | years of practical ability to access original birth records in England & | Wales, by giving birth mothers a right of veto. The proposal was thrown | out at the last minute. I can show you all of the argument presented for | and against. I can show you the official and the unofficial reasons why | the proposal was put forward. You won’t see a shonkier piece of | governance in a very long time. | | I believe each adoptive family and child/adult has the right to all available (non idendifying) medical information.  My child has that. Contact with me or access to the original birth records will add nothing. | | What you want, effectively stops the adopted person from ever being able | to know any other of his genetic family, Do you really think that a | birth mother should have the moral right to stop an adopted person  from | knowing all the other members of his or her family of origin? Do you | really think that  the birth mothers should have a right to prevent the | rest of the natural family from ever knowing the adopted person? | Yep.  The child I gave birth to is mine.  Just like the other chldren I have.  I do not allow my other children to visit their grandparents (on daddys side) without him present.  They have never and will never be allowed to spend the night, go out on trips with or otherwise be around them.  Been that way for 17 1/2 yrs and will be that way until they are all 18.  Do I care about their rights?  You can be sure that I dont.  Those children and their best interests are my responsibility and I will continue to do what I believe is best for them and the rest of our family.  No one is permenantly harmed or has their life put in danger by not knowing their birth family members.  My parents didnt make the adoption decision, my husband didnt, my other children didnt, I did it alone and with much thought and consideration as to what was best for the child, my other chldren and me.  That child has the right to be given everything a mother is capable of giving, which I did through adoption.  That child does not have the right at any point in his or her life to force themselves into my life if I do not wish them to.  I gave up all parental rights to that child, meaning I no longer either wanted to or felt able to be the parent of the child.  At least in my case the judge didnt say "Now are you sure you want to give up your parental role for …oh…5 yrss?  15 yrs?  how about 20?" Nope, he made it plain that this was a permanent decision and I had no expectations of seeing the child again, having any influence in the childs life in any way or anyting thing else resembling a parental right or responsibility. | | Most individuals involved appear not to want their informaiton sealed when the adoptee reaches an apropriate age. | | | | If you mean birtmothers, do you really honestly think that it should be | up to them? | Im not sure what you mean.  Up to the bmoms that the information is sealed until a certain time and then availble?  Or at what age it should be made available?  I can see no reason at all, from the perspective of a birth parent and parent, that records should be available (identifying info that is) before the age of 18.  I have made all information available for my child to access at the appropriate time.  I will be more than happy to meet my child but not before 18. | | However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I believe | that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is best for her | (contact or no contact) at that point in her life. | | | | It is at the very core of English adoption law that the rights and | interests throughout life, of the child who is to adopted are | paramount.  If a mother doesn’t want contact with the child she gave up | for adoption, then she should tell him so. If he can’t accept it and | makes a nuisance of him/her self then we anti-harassment laws | She tells him so by requesting that her information be withheld permenantly. Cant be much plainer than that. | | She may just not be emotionally ready to meet the child | | | | The person seeking her is not going to be child are they? Even in | Scotland where adoptees have always had a right to  access, the age at | which an adopted person can have their OBC and unseal the court record | is 16 years. | | Whatever age it is a child in the sense it is her child.  There are people who may never be ready to meet their adult adopted child. | or she may be in a relationship where the disclosure of an adoption could put her in physical danger. | | | | Sounds like the kind of relationship she’d want to  get out of pretty | damn fast to me. | | You must be very naive about the nature of abusive relationships.  Leaving is not that easy in many instances and may even cause the woman to be killed.  In the city I live in there is no access to spouse abuse shelters, spouse abuse counselling, or any other support system for a woman needing/wanting to leave.  I dont live in a huge town but definately not a tiny hick town either.  In fact a little over a year ago within a 3 week period two women were murdered by x’s.  One in walmart and one at the home she fled to in hopes of escaping the situation.  Myself, I can understand the problems with just walking out.  My second childs father was extremely abusive.  I left many times and was tracked down each time.  I did live where there was a shelter but he made such threats that they wouldnt let me stay there out of fear for the other women.  I was sent to the next state and moved from motel to motel.  Finally I got the money to go back home (1800 miles) and it took all of two week sfor him to find me again.  I dont want to go into detail but in the end my family was working closely wiht homicide detectives and my oldest child was being prepared by a social worker for the fact her mommy was most likely dead.  I did survive the attacks and he is currently serving 20yrs in prison on multiple felonys. Had I been strong enough to testify he was facing 102yrs and would have easily been convicted. The women he abused before me I later found out did also have his child and has been in hiding for 11yrs, the one before that fled the state and released the child for adoption (obviously lieing about who the father was). I go to great lengths to keep him out of my life and that includes letting our daughter know (age 15) that should she ever choose to contact him or have a  relationsihp of any kind with him I will have to (for my safety and the safety of her siblings) cut off all contact with her in an effort to keep him from finding me.  If I had a child from this situation that was adopted you can be sure I would want no contact of any kind.  What if she found him first and then THEY found me?  Dead meat….thats what! | Personally in my situation all information is available to my child however in the | beginning I requested no contact at all.  I can not imagine an instance where forcing contact on the birth parent against their wishes would be benificial to anyone involved. | | | | Opening adoption records and  telling adopted people everything that is | recored about there family of origin, is not tantamount to "forcing | contact on the birth parent against their wishes".  How do you think | that opening records "forces" contact upon anyone? | | Fine.  Open all the records and share all information except my surname, my address, my phone number or other identifying info. | I feel just as strongly that my child has the right to not be contacted by me if he/she chooses. | | | | That’s a completely different thing isn’t it? Most children, because | they were too young, didn’t have any choices at the time of the | adoption.  A child might have been adopted because of violence or | neglect by his or her natural parents, never visa versa,  giving the | adoptee some right of veto is in line with the … read more »

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I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against it but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I should not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone shouldnt have the right to not be contacted by me.

You have as much right as everyone else in this country to say "go away" if contacted.   However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I believe that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is best for her (contact or no contact) at that point in her life.

Then she probably should have had an abortion. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!" —–Unknown

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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | | It sounds great to me. If I understand correctly both birthmother and child | have the right to request no release of information that would aid in | contact. I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to | privacy in this situation. I also love that the birth parent has to give | all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to | explain themselves. | | BaD aSs Me | **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** | Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have the | right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other? I think you’ll find | the consensus here to be "no". If you’d like to read some of the arguments | against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org | | Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are | inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have bargains | to track down in the morning!) | | J. | I have visited that site before.  I have heard alot of arguments against it but personally cant really understand it.  I can not understand why I should not have the right to not be contacted by someone or why someone shouldnt have the right to not be contacted by me.

Bparents can say no just like anybody else. If someone persists in bothering you there are legal remedies such as TROs and torts. The only information I believe a bparent should be able to keep sealed is their surname, contact information, or other identifying information.

Why?  Access to one’s original birth certiface is not about reunion, which a personal relationship matter.  It’s about the right to access your own publicly held records.  Why should adoptees be set aside? knowing the adopted person? cut However there are some who do and should, IMHO, have that right.  I believe that birthmother is more aware of her situation and what is best for her (contact or no contact) at that point in her life.

She can just say no. There is no such thing as anon. in adoption despite what some bottom feeder social worker or well-heeled industrial lobbyist may claim. It is at the very core of English adoption law that the rights and interests throughout life, of the child who is to adopted are paramount. If a mother doesn’t want contact with the child she gave up for adoption, then she should tell him so. If he can’t accept it and makes a nuisance of him/her self then we anti-harassment laws She may just not be emotionally ready to meet the child

.And we are NOT children.  And she can alway say no. or she may be in a relationship where the disclosure of an adoption could put her in physical danger.

So you condone lies? Personally in my situation all information is available to my child however in the beginning I requested no contact at all.  I can not imagine an instance where forcing contact on the birth parent against their wishes would be benificial to anyone involved.

Who says it’s about contact.  Unfortunatey, under the sealed records system contact is the only way people can secure the right of identity and their own histories. I feel just as strongly that my child has the right to not be contacted by me if he/she chooses.

Again there is no right to not be contacted. Giving birth and relenquishing my parent control/rights does not entitle me to force myself into his/her life 18 yrs later.

Contact does not equal force. Marley – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -It sounds great to me.  If I understand correctly both birthmother and child have the right to request no release of information that would aid in contact.  I think that is the best way to respect every ones right to privacy in this situation.  I also love that the birth parent has to give all medical informaiton if they request no contact and have the option to explain themselves. BaD aSs Me **My opinions might have changed but not the fact that I am right!** Ah, one of our favorite topics arises yet again: does either party have the right to veto disclosure of their identity to the other?  I think you’ll find the consensus here to be "no".  If you’d like to read some of the arguments against vetos, I suspect you’ll find a few at http://bastards.org Personally, I’ve been persuaded that both sealed records and vetos are inappropriate, for too many reasons to try to go into tonight. (I have bargains to track down in the morning!) J.

It’s a bad bill and we’ll be working to kills this sucker. Marley – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – | Marilyn Churley who is an NDP MLA (member of the legislative assembly) has a | bill pushing for more disclosure in Ontario for adoptive parents and | children. She is a birthmother who gave up a child for adoption in 1968. | | her link is | | http://www.marilynchurley.com/the_issues/adoption/ | | Doug Thomas | | Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

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Question:

Changes to birth and death certificates For those of you who understand that there was a Regulatory Reform Order laid before Parliament on the 23 July 2004 and which is now before the Regulatory Reform Committee. You will understand that  now  is the time to make your representations to that Committee. You have until Friday 17 September 2004 to do so. Past representations that you have made to MPs etc including response forms, have already been looked at and as a result this Regulatory Reform Order makes many  major changes to the proposals published for consultation in July  of  last year If you do not know how to make a representation to the Regulatory Reform Committee then please read the following page. http://www.parliament.uk/parliamentary_committees/regulatory_reform_c… e/ rrc_pn__2003_04__14.cfm Whatever you do, please don

Question:

10:31 am: u do with me, when i come to make holiday at your home….

Umm….entertain you with a long discussion on the politics and history of openness in adoption records in England & Wales and how and why it differs from that in Scotland. Then maybe we could talk about adoption in your country. Robin

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u do with me, when i come to make holiday at your home….

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http://www.theunionleader.com/articles_showa.html?article=36513 Another View, Con: Let parents be anonymous By THOMAS ATWOOD Guest Commentary THE MANDATORY-openness bill now before the Legislature, SB 335, would harm adoption and unjustly and unnecessarily disrupt the lives of many innocent people. Adoption is a highly successful social institution that has served needy children and birth parents who are unable or unready to parent. It makes no sense to undermine this pro-child institution by imposing a policy of mandatory

Question:

I would just like to add to the nice comments made about Bill Pierce. I always thought of him as a nice guy, courteous and with a good sense of humour. Even when he disagreed with someone (or they with him) he was unfailingly polite in his responses. He loved Marley, and that’s enough for me. <g As they say in Dublin about people like him: he was a decent skin – a gentleman and a scholar. Helen

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – "…Each man’s death diminishes me, For I am involved in mankind.     Therefore, send not to know for whom the bell tolls,     It tolls for thee. "              –John Donne http://washingtontimes.com/op-ed/20040113-085235-2881r.htm "…The poet Emily Dickinson wrote, "If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain." Mr. Pierce, the mender of countless broken hearts, was 68-years-old when he died yesterday. He lived to make individuals whole. He did not live in vain…"  Op-Ed, Washington Times,  January 14, 2004 Speaking as a "dime-a-dozen" English major…I can honestly state that not one person came close to stopping my heart from breaking… until I found you. pb… "They say such nice things about people at funerals that it makes   me sad to realize that I’m going to miss mine by just a few days."                                            – Garrison Keillor Great post, pb.

I’m not sure what’s going on here, but I should say that Bill, while providing balm to many, equally contributed to the breaking of quite a few hearts in the process. Rh. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Diane Welfare, "she describes the US market as a "$US1.4 billion business in baby trafficking". ~~121603 http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2003/12/15/1071336884771.html

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writes: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – "…Each man’s death diminishes me, For I am involved in mankind.     Therefore, send not to know for whom the bell tolls,     It tolls for thee. "          –John Donne http://washingtontimes.com/op-ed/20040113-085235-2881r.htm "…The poet Emily Dickinson wrote, "If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain." Mr. Pierce, the mender of countless broken hearts, was 68-years-old when he died yesterday. He lived to make individuals whole. He did not live in vain…"  Op-Ed, Washington Times,  January 14, 2004 Speaking as a "dime-a-dozen" English major…I can honestly state that not one person came close to stopping my heart from breaking… until I found you. pb… "They say such nice things about people at funerals that it makes   me sad to realize that I’m going to miss mine by just a few days."                                                – Garrison Keillor Great post, pb. I’m not sure what’s going on here, but I should say that Bill, while providing balm to many, equally contributed to the breaking of quite a few hearts in the process. Rh.

Thank you. Your post confirms exactly what was said. Note that I posted two quotes, but sandwiched in between was the URL for the Editorial on the death of Dr. Pierce which appeared in The Washington Times. Hopeful as I was that readers would follow the yellow brick road, it seems the romanticized quotations stood for what some *thought* I had said. Since you, Rh, are posting through google.groups you will have missed my follow-up post with this subject title:  Let Us Never Forget — for you, and others who may also miss my initial post: Newsgroups: alt.adoption For the edification of all here without firsthand knowledge of the Uniform Adoption Act as it was connected to the NCFA and the late Dr. William Pierce, may he rest in peace: http://groups.google.com/groups?q=+%22uniform+adoption+act%22+group:a… You will find this search set up by date, with the older posts being on page 2 of 2. pb…

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– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -writes: Never mind……found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/ This part could be interesting…… ****The National Council For Adoption invites tributes to its founding president, William L. Pierce, for inclusion on its website, , including your name, affiliation, and title, or association with Bill Pierce. ****** No tears were shed in the making of this post. For some reason, I feel sorta bad about this.  I didn’t agree with (almost) anything he said, but I enjoyed his presence on a.a.   Nancy There are very few deaths that one can or should rejoice in. Bill Pierce’s death is not one of them for me, if for no other reason than he was a friend of a friend who mourns his death.   Whether one agreed with him or not on adoption issues, he also was one of us for a time.   J.

"…Each man’s death diminishes me, For I am involved in mankind.     Therefore, send not to know for whom the bell tolls,     It tolls for thee. "           –John Donne http://washingtontimes.com/op-ed/20040113-085235-2881r.htm "…The poet Emily Dickinson wrote, "If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain." Mr. Pierce, the mender of countless broken hearts, was 68-years-old when he died yesterday. He lived to make individuals whole. He did not live in vain…"  Op-Ed, Washington Times,  January 14, 2004 Speaking as a "dime-a-dozen" English major…I can honestly state that not one person came close to stopping my heart from breaking… until I found you. pb… "They say such nice things about people at funerals that it makes   me sad to realize that I’m going to miss mine by just a few days."                                                 — Garrison Keillor Great post, pb. Diane Welfare, "she describes the US market as a "$US1.4 billion business in baby trafficking". ~~121603 http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2003/12/15/1071336884771.html

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Never mind……found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/ This part could be interesting…… ****The National Council For Adoption invites tributes to its founding president, William L. Pierce, for inclusion on its website, www.adoptioncouncil.org . Please email submissions to , including your name, affiliation, and title, or association with Bill Pierce. ****** No tears were shed in the making of this post. Christina <<<<Pierce worked tirelessly to present infant adoption as a loving option and played a major role in conceiving the Infant Adoption Awareness Act. This policy, part of the Children’s Health Act of 2000, created the Infant Adoption Awareness Training Program, which trains health and pregnancy counselors in presenting adoption as a positive option for unplanned pregnancy Pierce brought insurmountable misery to countless US mothers in his quest to encourage more infant adoption in the early 80’s when it was all but over in most other parts of the western world. His legacy will live on eternally for them. Di Was it a gun, or a knife that he held to these mother’s heads to force them to relinquish? While I might not agree with his position on most adoption issues, I do believe he encouraged adoption because he felt it was the best thing for the children. Whether or not that was actually the case, it’s hard not to respect someone who has such high regard for children.  The man was a gentleman. While the open records community might just breath a collective sigh of relief that their most outspoken adversary will now be silent, I doubt that most are celebrating his death.  I find it incredibly tacky and insensitive to only point out negative things.  I hope when your time comes, people don’t sit around thinking of all of the things they feel you did wrong, or that they disagreed with you about.  I hope you’re shown more respect than that.  Most people (Mr. Pierce most definitely included) deserve it. Can anyone confirm or deny the rumor of his passing? I just received an email on this today. — Christina Kathy, born Renee Karyn Racine Permanent good can never be the outcome of untruth and violence. –Mahatma Gandhi     Peace is not merely a distant goal that we seek, but a means by which we arrive at that goal. –Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.        

I agree, he was always a gentleman on this group and I believe he respected others opinions, even though he didn’t always agree with them. There are many who still believe in closed records, I see it all the time, even though I disagree, that is their opinion and they are entitled to it. It doesn’t make them a bad person, or even mean they are wrong. The chocolate and vanilla theory, you can’t make one like the other.  In his defense, I never saw him hostile, nasty, condemning or demeaning. He seemed like a tolerant man. He deserves respect, even if you disagreed with him.  

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Never mind……found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/ This part could be interesting…… ****The National Council For Adoption invites tributes to its founding president, William L. Pierce, for inclusion on its website, www.adoptioncouncil.org . Please email submissions to , including your name, affiliation, and title, or association with Bill Pierce. ****** No tears were shed in the making of this post. Christina <<<<Pierce worked tirelessly to present infant adoption as a loving option and played a major role in conceiving the Infant Adoption Awareness Act. This policy, part of the Children’s Health Act of 2000, created the Infant Adoption Awareness Training Program, which trains health and pregnancy counselors in presenting adoption as a positive option for unplanned pregnancy Pierce brought insurmountable misery to countless US mothers in his quest to encourage more infant adoption in the early 80’s when it was all but over in most other parts of the western world. His legacy will live on eternally for them. Di

Was it a gun, or a knife that he held to these mother’s heads to force them to relinquish? While I might not agree with his position on most adoption issues, I do believe he encouraged adoption because he felt it was the best thing for the children. Whether or not that was actually the case, it’s hard not to respect someone who has such high regard for children.  The man was a gentleman.  While the open records community might just breath a collective sigh of relief that their most outspoken adversary will now be silent, I doubt that most are celebrating his death.  I find it incredibly tacky and insensitive to only point out negative things.  I hope when your time comes, people don’t sit around thinking of all of the things they feel you did wrong, or that they disagreed with you about.  I hope you’re shown more respect than that.  Most people (Mr. Pierce most definitely included) deserve it. Can anyone confirm or deny the rumor of his passing? I just received an email on this today. — Christina

Kathy, born Renee Karyn Racine Permanent good can never be the outcome of untruth and violence. –Mahatma Gandhi         Peace is not merely a distant goal that we seek, but a means by which we arrive at that goal. –Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.    

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Bill Pierce was my adversary, not only did he lead the movement against opening records, he embodied the attitudes and political inertia that keeps the United States the sole industrialized nation that seals its adoption records to adult adoptees. But he was a worthy adversary. Bill Pierce helped shape the open records movement by the quality and attitude of his opposition to it. He was a consummate professional politician, in all the connotations of the word, and thus he compelled us to become better activists, organizers, and politicians. Bill did not suffer fools, at least those who disagreed with him, and so he made us keep our wits sharpened, especially when we went one on one with him. He was the best the sealed records crowd had to offer; no one has attained his stature since his retirement. I had the opportunity to get to know Bill personally, not closely, but enough to get a hint of the man. We shared an appreciation for a good joke, a good argument, a good fight. He used to post to alt.adoption, in various guises, never as himself, until a few of us caught on and started ragging on him mercilessly. Then, one day shortly thereafter, he appeared as Pierceforhimself, and although he never admitted his Walter Mitty-esque turns pretending to be a congressional aide or an African-American physician, he never complained about the abuse we heaped on him either. Once, at a taping of a TV show on which we both appeared, we spoke about life after the fray, in a future when records were opened to adult adoptees, and he seemed filled with equinimity. After the show was over, as the theme music came up in the house, Bill started boogying enthusiastically in his chair. I’ll hold the smile that evoked as his memory. Ron Morgan Proud Bastard Community Organizer San Francisco, CA 1/13/04 Aside from his charming debating skills, his lifelong crusade denied millions of adopted people their human rights and many died well ahead of him, never knowing their true identity. And many mothers died never knowing what became of their children. Because of him. Who will write their epitaphs? Di

Bill Pierce was against opening the records that someone else closed before him.  Let’s try to keep our eye on the ball here. Kathy, born Renee Karyn Racine Permanent good can never be the outcome of untruth and violence. –Mahatma Gandhi         Peace is not merely a distant goal that we seek, but a means by which we arrive at that goal. –Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.    

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – writes: Never mind……found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/ This part could be interesting…… ****The National Council For Adoption invites tributes to its founding president, William L. Pierce, for inclusion on its website, www.adoptioncouncil.org . Please email submissions to , including your name, affiliation, and title, or association with Bill Pierce. ****** No tears were shed in the making of this post. For some reason, I feel sorta bad about this.  I didn’t agree with (almost) anything he said, but I enjoyed his presence on a.a.   Nancy There are very few deaths that one can or should rejoice in. Bill Pierce’s death is not one of them for me, if for no other reason than he was a friend of a friend who mourns his death.   Whether one agreed with him or not on adoption issues, he also was one of us for a time.   J. Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

Very well said J.  I agree completely.  I may not have agreed with many of his words, but he spoke them with respect and dignity. May he rest in peace. Kathy, born Renee Karyn Racine Permanent good can never be the outcome of untruth and violence. –Mahatma Gandhi         Peace is not merely a distant goal that we seek, but a means by which we arrive at that goal. –Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.    

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Bill Pierce was my adversary, not only did he lead the movement against opening records, he embodied the attitudes and political inertia that keeps the United States the sole industrialized nation that seals its adoption records to adult adoptees. But he was a worthy adversary.

<!—snip— Aside from his charming debating skills, his lifelong crusade denied millions of adopted people their human rights and many died well ahead of him, never knowing their true identity. And many mothers died never knowing what became of their children. Because of him. Who will write their epitaphs? Di

The living. Ron

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Bill Pierce was my adversary, not only did he lead the movement against opening records, he embodied the attitudes and political inertia that keeps the United States the sole industrialized nation that seals its adoption records to adult adoptees. But he was a worthy adversary. Bill Pierce helped shape the open records movement by the quality and attitude of his opposition to it. He was a consummate professional politician, in all the connotations of the word, and thus he compelled us to become better activists, organizers, and politicians. Bill did not suffer fools, at least those who disagreed with him, and so he made us keep our wits sharpened, especially when we went one on one with him. He was the best the sealed records crowd had to offer; no one has attained his stature since his retirement. I had the opportunity to get to know Bill personally, not closely, but enough to get a hint of the man. We shared an appreciation for a good joke, a good argument, a good fight. He used to post to alt.adoption, in various guises, never as himself, until a few of us caught on and started ragging on him mercilessly. Then, one day shortly thereafter, he appeared as Pierceforhimself, and although he never admitted his Walter Mitty-esque turns pretending to be a congressional aide or an African-American physician, he never complained about the abuse we heaped on him either. Once, at a taping of a TV show on which we both appeared, we spoke about life after the fray, in a future when records were opened to adult adoptees, and he seemed filled with equinimity. After the show was over, as the theme music came up in the house, Bill started boogying enthusiastically in his chair. I’ll hold the smile that evoked as his memory. Ron Morgan Proud Bastard Community Organizer San Francisco, CA 1/13/04 Aside from his charming debating skills, his lifelong crusade denied millions of adopted people their human rights and many died well ahead of him, never knowing their true identity. And many mothers died never knowing what became of their children. Because of him. Who will write their epitaphs?

  I think you should get in touch with the Pierce family and offer to give the eulogy. Dad

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Rest in Peace Bill Pierce.. Jackie

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- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Never mind……found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/ This part could be interesting…… ****The National Council For Adoption invites tributes to its founding president, William L. Pierce, for inclusion on its website, , including your name, affiliation, and title, or association with Bill Pierce. ****** No tears were shed in the making of this post. For some reason, I feel sorta bad about this.  I didn’t agree with (almost) anything he said, but I enjoyed his presence on a.a.   Nancy Agreed.

I’ve only known of Bill Pierce for the short time I’ve been posting here, but I agree to. Rh. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!" —–Unknown

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  I enjoyed reading Dr. Pierce’s posts.  Regardless of his beliefs, he was sincere about them and was a well-spoken advocate for his cause.   He often found ways to disagree without being condescending or demeaning… something I find lacking in myself.   Godspeed, Bill Pierce.

Yes. I am shocked and saddened to hear that he has died. I always read his posts, and I think that they were true to his own values; they had integrity. And, as you say, he was able to disagree in a rational way, and was willing to debate with people who had different values. He also had a nice sense of humor. He sounded like a gentleman. I wish I could have met him. Rupa

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Never mind……found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/ This part could be interesting…… ****The National Council For Adoption invites tributes to its founding president, William L. Pierce, for inclusion on its website, , including your name, affiliation, and title, or association with Bill Pierce. ****** No tears were shed in the making of this post. Christina

<<<<Pierce worked tirelessly to present infant adoption as a loving option and played a major role in conceiving the Infant Adoption Awareness Act. This policy, part of the Children’s Health Act of 2000, created the Infant Adoption Awareness Training Program, which trains health and pregnancy counselors in presenting adoption as a positive option for unplanned pregnancy Pierce brought insurmountable misery to countless US mothers in his quest to encourage more infant adoption in the early 80’s when it was all but over in most other parts of the western world. His legacy will live on eternally for them. Di – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Can anyone confirm or deny the rumor of his passing? I just received an email on this today. — Christina —–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–==  Over 100,000 Newsgroups – 19 Different Servers! =—– —–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–==  Over 100,000 Newsgroups – 19 Different Servers! =—–

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Bill Pierce was my adversary, not only did he lead the movement against opening records, he embodied the attitudes and political inertia that keeps the United States the sole industrialized nation that seals its adoption records to adult adoptees. But he was a worthy adversary. Bill Pierce helped shape the open records movement by the quality and attitude of his opposition to it. He was a consummate professional politician, in all the connotations of the word, and thus he compelled us to become better activists, organizers, and politicians. Bill did not suffer fools, at least those who disagreed with him, and so he made us keep our wits sharpened, especially when we went one on one with him. He was the best the sealed records crowd had to offer; no one has attained his stature since his retirement. I had the opportunity to get to know Bill personally, not closely, but enough to get a hint of the man. We shared an appreciation for a good joke, a good argument, a good fight. He used to post to alt.adoption, in various guises, never as himself, until a few of us caught on and started ragging on him mercilessly. Then, one day shortly thereafter, he appeared as Pierceforhimself, and although he never admitted his Walter Mitty-esque turns pretending to be a congressional aide or an African-American physician, he never complained about the abuse we heaped on him either. Once, at a taping of a TV show on which we both appeared, we spoke about life after the fray, in a future when records were opened to adult adoptees, and he seemed filled with equinimity. After the show was over, as the theme music came up in the house, Bill started boogying enthusiastically in his chair. I’ll hold the smile that evoked as his memory. Ron Morgan Proud Bastard Community Organizer San Francisco, CA 1/13/04

Aside from his charming debating skills, his lifelong crusade denied millions of adopted people their human rights and many died well ahead of him, never knowing their true identity. And many mothers died never knowing what became of their children. Because of him. Who will write their epitaphs? Di

Response:

Bill Pierce was my adversary, not only did he lead the movement against opening records, he embodied the attitudes and political inertia that keeps the United States the sole industrialized nation that seals its adoption records to adult adoptees. But he was a worthy adversary. Bill Pierce helped shape the open records movement by the quality and attitude of his opposition to it. He was a consummate professional politician, in all the connotations of the word, and thus he compelled us to become better activists, organizers, and politicians. Bill did not suffer fools, at least those who disagreed with him, and so he made us keep our wits sharpened, especially when we went one on one with him. He was the best the sealed records crowd had to offer; no one has attained his stature since his retirement. I had the opportunity to get to know Bill personally, not closely, but enough to get a hint of the man. We shared an appreciation for a good joke, a good argument, a good fight. He used to post to alt.adoption, in various guises, never as himself, until a few of us caught on and started ragging on him mercilessly. Then, one day shortly thereafter, he appeared as Pierceforhimself, and although he never admitted his Walter Mitty-esque turns pretending to be a congressional aide or an African-American physician, he never complained about the abuse we heaped on him either. Once, at a taping of a TV show on which we both appeared, we spoke about life after the fray, in a future when records were opened to adult adoptees, and he seemed filled with equinimity. After the show was over, as the theme music came up in the house, Bill started boogying enthusiastically in his chair. I’ll hold the smile that evoked as his memory. Ron Morgan Proud Bastard Community Organizer San Francisco, CA 1/13/04

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Bill Pierce was my adversary, not only did he lead the movement against opening records, he embodied the attitudes and political inertia that keeps the United States the sole industrialized nation that seals its adoption records to adult adoptees. But he was a worthy adversary. Bill Pierce helped shape the open records movement by the quality and attitude of his opposition to it. He was a consummate professional politician, in all the connotations of the word, and thus he compelled us to become better activists, organizers, and politicians. Bill did not suffer fools, at least those who disagreed with him, and so he made us keep our wits sharpened, especially when we went one on one with him. He was the best the sealed records crowd had to offer; no one has attained his stature since his retirement. I had the opportunity to get to know Bill personally, not closely, but enough to get a hint of the man. We shared an appreciation for a good joke, a good argument, a good fight. He used to post to alt.adoption, in various guises, never as himself, until a few of us caught on and started ragging on him mercilessly. Then, one day shortly thereafter, he appeared as Pierceforhimself, and although he never admitted his Walter Mitty-esque turns pretending to be a congressional aide or an African-American physician, he never complained about the abuse we heaped on him either. Once, at a taping of a TV show on which we both appeared, we spoke about life after the fray, in a future when records were opened to adult adoptees, and he seemed filled with equinimity. After the show was over, as the theme music came up in the house, Bill started boogying enthusiastically in his chair. I’ll hold the smile that evoked as his memory. Ron Morgan

Ron, whenever I think of Bill P, I’ll hold the memory of him from your post in my mind.  Thanks. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!" —–Unknown

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –  < snip There are very few deaths that one can or should rejoice in. Bill Pierce’s death is not one of them for me, if for no other reason than he was a friend of a friend who mourns his death.   Whether one agreed with him or not on adoption issues, he also was one of us for a time.  I enjoyed reading Dr. Pierce’s posts.  Regardless of his beliefs, he was sincere about them and was a well-spoken advocate for his cause.  He often found ways to disagree without being condescending or demeaning… something I find lacking in myself.  Godspeed, Bill Pierce. Dad

Out of lurkdom for me too.  I am very saddened by this news. Tif

Response:

…..found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/

Thank you so much for posting this Christina.  Kathy J

Response:

  < snip There are very few deaths that one can or should rejoice in. Bill Pierce’s death is not one of them for me, if for no other reason than he was a friend of a friend who mourns his death.   Whether one agreed with him or not on adoption issues, he also was one of us for a time.

  I enjoyed reading Dr. Pierce’s posts.  Regardless of his beliefs, he was sincere about them and was a well-spoken advocate for his cause.   He often found ways to disagree without being condescending or demeaning… something I find lacking in myself.   Godspeed, Bill Pierce. Dad

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Never mind……found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/ This part could be interesting…… ****The National Council For Adoption invites tributes to its founding president, William L. Pierce, for inclusion on its website, , including your name, affiliation, and title, or association with Bill Pierce. ****** No tears were shed in the making of this post. For some reason, I feel sorta bad about this.  I didn’t agree with (almost) anything he said, but I enjoyed his presence on a.a.   Nancy

Agreed. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!" —–Unknown

Response:

writes: – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Never mind……found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/ This part could be interesting…… ****The National Council For Adoption invites tributes to its founding president, William L. Pierce, for inclusion on its website, , including your name, affiliation, and title, or association with Bill Pierce. ****** No tears were shed in the making of this post. For some reason, I feel sorta bad about this.  I didn’t agree with (almost) anything he said, but I enjoyed his presence on a.a.   Nancy

There are very few deaths that one can or should rejoice in. Bill Pierce’s death is not one of them for me, if for no other reason than he was a friend of a friend who mourns his death.   Whether one agreed with him or not on adoption issues, he also was one of us for a time.   J. Reply to jmhjmd at aol.

Response:

Can anyone confirm or deny the rumor of his passing? I just received an email on this today. — Christina —–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–==  Over 100,000 Newsgroups – 19 Different Servers! =—–

Response:

Never mind……found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/ This part could be interesting…… ****The National Council For Adoption invites tributes to its founding president, William L. Pierce, for inclusion on its website, , including your name, affiliation, and title, or association with Bill Pierce. ****** No tears were shed in the making of this post. Christina Can anyone confirm or deny the rumor of his passing? I just received an email on this today. — Christina —–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–==  Over 100,000 Newsgroups – 19 Different Servers! =—–

—–= Posted via Newsfeeds.Com, Uncensored Usenet News =—– http://www.newsfeeds.com – The #1 Newsgroup Service in the World! —–==  Over 100,000 Newsgroups – 19 Different Servers! =—–

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Never mind……found it; http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/ This part could be interesting…… ****The National Council For Adoption invites tributes to its founding president, William L. Pierce, for inclusion on its website, , including your name, affiliation, and title, or association with Bill Pierce. ****** No tears were shed in the making of this post. Christina

NO! Really? Diane Welfare, "she describes the US market as a "$US1.4 billion business in baby trafficking". ~~121603 http://www.smh.com.au/articles/2003/12/15/1071336884771.html

Response:

Question:

Records open for WHO?  Not for the birthparents who are searching.   Only adoptees in a few states can get their OBC’s.  Bastard Nation has done nothing for the birthparents out there who are searching and having to pay huge fees to "find." Sounds to me that it’s a birthparent issue that you might want to bring up with CUB.  Bastard Nation is group formed specifically to address adoptee’s rights, as I see it.

The big problem for "GoAway", of course, is that there is some fair sympathy for adoptees in the public realm when you explain the issues — most people get the idea that the adoptee didn’t have any say in what happened shortly after their birth. So selling them on the idea that adoptees should have equal rights to their state-held birth information is something that is doable. Whereas many, many people still consider (correctly or incorrectly) that birthparents made a decision and should live with it. That isn’t the message GoAway wants to hear, but it does explain why, after years of advocacy, groups like CUB haven’t gained any significant traction. Some people cannot wait for Bastard Nation to "open records" (and not do a damn thing for birthparents).  They want to find NOW.   Some people are sick and have a desperate need for medical history. For sure.  I have to add that this situation will continue and propping up the system doesn’t do a damned thing about that sad state of affairs.

So what’s the solution as far as GoAway is concerned? Legal challenges have tried and failed. There’s no federal solution. The only answer is state-by-state reform of adoption laws. BN has had some notable success there, whereas CUB hasn’t. GoAway is whining about what BN has done instead of looking to herself and like-minded souls about what they could be doing to change the law. GoAway should perhaps noodle through the problem and figure out what she could DO. I’m only a friend of BN, not an adoptee, but it strikes me that if CUB could actually get off its collective ass and do some organizing, they might be able to work profitably with BN. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Why don’t you use some of your time, instead of posting non-sensical responses to subjects like "Dr. Phil",  "Miss Manners", Yardbitch, etc..,  and get off your political ass and do something to help triad members in your state that might not be around in the next 50-100 years when/if their states open records.   Better yet, why not become a "Yahoo Group Recruiter" like Bernice.   Only difference being that you will tell people that YOUR group is the #1 group to join (don’t forget to add the $100 joiners  fee or the discount ‘pay by the year’ fee) and of course, they MUST pay for all their plane tickets and hotel rooms to fly around the country side when Bastard Nation has it’s get-togethers and brouhahas, such as "Bastards On the Bayou", "Bastards March in WA", etc…,  Not all of us are rich and can afford even a $100 fee, let alone these fun-filled rendevous around the good ole US of A. Ehhh..it’s actually only $35.00 as I recall.  I usually toss in a few extra bucks because I can afford it and I believe in the mission.  As far as the conferences go, there’s no requirement to attend, and a Bastard can get the skinny on what was discussed as well as have some input prior to the conference.  I haven’t been able to attend any because of other commitments, but I’m satisfied that the attendees, besides having some fun, discussed issues that are important to the future and mission of the organization.

You’re far too kind, Jack. GoAway is letting out the typical clueless rant: she wants what she wants but doesn’t want to invest anything into getting it. She wants it all done for her. This explains why she hasn’t actually accomplished anything. Even if one disagrees with BN (I don’t), one has to acknowledge that, unlike a lot of other adoption advocacy organizations, BN actually rolls up its sleeves and DOES something. GoAway should take the proper lesson from that. Glad you have the money to fly around the country for Bastard events. Most of us don’t. Jesus.  Plane tickets aren’t ~that~ expensive.

It ain’t the money, it’s the whine. steve

Response:

What are you talking about?  What’s a Yahoo recruiter?.  Membership is $35/year and we have hardship memberships for Poor Bastards. No offense but I hate that name, poor bastards .

Okay, how ’bout Destitute Bastards?  Sheesh. Their fees go as high as  $500.00 depending on how much you want to be involved . Thirty five gets you the basics .

Basics?  $35.00 gets you the exact same thing as $500.00.   Like I explained to "GoAway" I toss in some extra dough because I believe in the mission. I’m happy to do it but I get no added benefits other than personal satisfaction of supporting a cause I believe in. Jack

Response:

Since we are talking politics here let`s be perfectly honest . The government sees adoption issues as it sees all other minority issues . If they could earn money from open records the records would have been opened years ago . We are not fighting against protection of identity, we are fighting big business profits . Adoption is portrayed as a saintly thing for humankind when in fact it has always been a huge money source for the rich . Are we so naive to believe that adoptions do not include the backing of the government officials who gain financially from adoptions and will fight against it their entire lives ?

You started off asking to be perfectly honest, and then you advance a discredited argument. There might be profits in the adoption industry for a few [1], but most agencies generate enough funds to pay the bills and that’s about it. Many agencies are non-profits. I’ve been to some in my own journey and they certainly weren’t posh. Adoptions are not a "huge money source for the rich": the rich have much better ways of making money than worrying about adoptions. There’s so-o-o many ways of making money out there if that’s what you want. No, the people scamming in adoption [2] are not rich, they’re generally average Joes/Janes with sociopathic tendencies who’ve decided to scam others in hopes of becoming rich. In that way they aren’t much different than the usual hucksters, carnival barkers and scam-artists that you see in other walks of life, bilking the elderly, cashing welfare checks, working on sweetheart deals with the village council for a plot of land, and so on. Adoption may not be "saintly", but it is a good thing when it’s done properly. That’s why it has endured. As to "government officials who gain financially from adoption", could you name a few? Are you trying to tell me that the NAACP the Republican Party, AARP and the Knights of Columbus pay for their members to attend yearly conventions? Boy, if that’s the case I’m gonna join every orgaization I can. The above cannot be compared to BN in any way .

Why not? Each is an advocacy organization: for minorities, for a political point of view, for the elderly, etc. The success of each depends on the effort their members make combined with the sense and power of their arguments. Each has meetings of their membership, and members pay their way (or find sponsors). That’s how it works. When I go to a convention of the American Thoracic Society, I pay my way. Who else is going to? You? She isn`t stating that, she is simply stating a fact being that a huge majority of the citizens in this country work for beans or are unemployed due to the fact that all of our industry has moved abroad.

Oh dear, it seems you’re clueless at multiple levels. The poverty line is at 13%, not 50%, most of our industry has in fact not moved (sniff the air sometime), average wages per worker continue to climb, and current unemployment, 6%, is what economists used to consider to be "full employment." You might do better on multiple fronts if you thought your arguments through before voicing them. steve [1] Why hello Marcy, I was just thinking of you  :-) [2] Ibid!

Response:

Records open for WHO?  Not for the birthparents who are searching.  Only adoptees in a few states can get their OBC’s.  Bastard Nation has done nothing for the birthparents out there who are searching and having to pay huge fees to "find."

Sounds to me that it’s a birthparent issue that you might want to bring up with CUB.  Bastard Nation is group formed specifically to address adoptee’s rights, as I see it. <snip Some people cannot wait for Bastard Nation to "open records" (and not do a damn thing for birthparents).  They want to find NOW.  Some people are sick and have a desperate need for medical history.

For sure.  I have to add that this situation will continue and propping up the system doesn’t do a damned thing about that sad state of affairs.  Why don’t you use some of your time, instead of posting non-sensical responses to subjects like "Dr. Phil",  "Miss Manners", Yardbitch, etc..,  and get off your political ass and do something to help triad members in your state that might not be around in the next 50-100 years when/if their states open records.  Better yet, why not become a "Yahoo Group Recruiter" like Bernice.  Only difference being that you will tell people that YOUR group is the #1 group to join (don’t forget to add the $100 joiners  fee or the discount ‘pay by the year’ fee) and of course, they MUST pay for all their plane tickets and hotel rooms to fly around the country side when Bastard Nation has it’s get-togethers and brouhahas, such as "Bastards On the Bayou", "Bastards March in WA", etc…,  Not all of us are rich and can afford even a $100 fee, let alone these fun-filled rendevous around the good ole US of A.

Ehhh..it’s actually only $35.00 as I recall.  I usually toss in a few extra bucks because I can afford it and I believe in the mission.  As far as the conferences go, there’s no requirement to attend, and a Bastard can get the skinny on what was discussed as well as have some input prior to the conference.  I haven’t been able to attend any because of other commitments, but I’m satisfied that the attendees, besides having some fun, discussed issues that are important to the future and mission of the organization. <snip Glad you have the money to fly around the country for Bastard events. Most of us don’t.

Jesus.  Plane tickets aren’t ~that~ expensive. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Records open for WHO?  Not for the birthparents who are searching.  Only adoptees in a few states can get their OBC’s.  Bastard Nation has done nothing for the birthparents out there who are searching and having to pay huge fees to "find." Birth parent legal arguments are totally different and need to be addressed as such. In the US they can’t be conflated.  IT is political suicide  Ask those who have tried it.  Birth parents should develop their own strategies and organizations.  CUB has been around for 30 years.  I have a great deal of respect for CUB, but can you name one single state in which the have opened records for bparents?  Look to your own constituency before you complain about others. Marley, I hear you live either close to or in Columbus, OH.  Just because you’re all about politics for open records, not all of us are because we simply don’t have the time. If you simply do searches and do not engage in political activites then you are helping to perpetute the sealed records, secret adoption system.  How can doing searches for individuals (by whatever means) further along identity rights? It simply carries on the status quo of secret government dossiers.  No doubt you don’t care for unions either.   This is about class struggle, not favours.

Since we are talking politics here let`s be perfectly honest . The government sees adoption issues as it sees all other minority issues . If they could earn money from open records the records would have been opened years ago . We are not fighting against protection of identity, we are fighting big business profits . Adoption is portrayed as a saintly thing for humankind when in fact it has always been a huge money source for the rich . Are we so naive to believe that adoptions do not include the backing of the government officials who gain financially from adoptions and will fight against it their entire lives ? Some of us are here to help others if we can at no cost.  Why don’t you then, in your spare time instead of posting on alt.adoption all day, volunteer to do some lookups at Vital Stats? I do.  I’m there twice a month.  Just ask Sue at the front desk.

Thank you for answering my prior question . – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –  Lots of adoptees need them for years that are incomplete for Ohio.  Many live in different states and cannot afford to fly in to do the lookups themselves. I’ve done more lookups than you can imagine. I’m a trained historian, and was using public records before some of you around here were born.  I’m a professional oppositional researcher. Some people cannot wait for Bastard Nation to "open records" (and not do a damn thing for birthparents).  They want to find NOW.  Some people are sick and have a desperate need for medical history.  Why don’t you use some of your time, instead of posting non-sensical responses to subjects like "Dr. Phil",  "Miss Manners", Yardbitch, etc..,  and get off your political ass and do something to help triad members in your state that might not be around in the next 50-100 years when/if their states open records. That must be why I spent the last 2 weeks writing a report to the State Department on it’s attempts via the Hague privatize the adoption records of international adoptees.  That must be why I’ve spent the last 4 years of my life dedicted go baby dumps.   That must be why I waste my time in scholarly writing on adoptionand writing op-ed pieces and letters to the editor and talking to legislators and reporters and TV stations. Better yet, why not become a "Yahoo Group Recruiter" like Bernice.  Only difference being that you will tell people that YOUR group is the #1 group to join (don’t forget to add the $100 joiners  fee or the discount ‘pay by the year’ What are you talking about?  What’s a Yahoo recruiter?.  Membership is $35/year and we have hardship memberships for Poor Bastards.

No offense but I hate that name, poor bastards . Their fees go as high as  $500.00 depending on how much you want to be involved . Thirty five gets you the basics . fee) and of course, they MUST pay for all their plane tickets and hotel rooms to fly around the country side when Bastard Nation has it’s get-togethers and brouhahas, such as "Bastards On the Bayou", "Bastards March in WA", etc…,  Not all of us are rich and can afford even a $100 fee, let alone these fun-filled rendevous around the good ole US of A. Are you trying to tell me that the NAACP the Republican Party, AARP and the Knights of Columbus pay for their members to attend yearly conventions? Boy, if that’s the case I’m gonna join every orgaization I can.

The above cannot be compared to BN in any way . Yes Dear, we do write letters to our legislators, senators and other heads of state.  We do what we can in our spare time but you see, some of us have children, and husband’s and families. Well, that’s your lifestyle choice.  Pretty boring, huh?

Actually no, it is quite the opposite . Two of my children are deeply involved in the open records movement and take every opportunity to educate the public and political figures in adoption issues . – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – We’re not like you, a person who has a strong dislike for children ( I think you refer to them as Sprog’s Frog’s or something similar), no matter that you were one yourself once upon a time. What’s that suppose to mean?  Lots of people are happily free. Many of us are educated enough to know that Online Petitions do not go anywhere, that they are not taken seriously, yet somewhere, sometime back, you yourself were urging others to sign some stupid online petition. I can only remember one (not a BN petition) ,and the purpose of it was to gather names and addresses. They are not taken seriously without a signature, name, address, and phone number, yet you, with all your education, probably didn’t realize that. Of course, they’re not.  That’s why we don’t use them.  In the current state of affairs ou could bring in real petitions with 18,765,000 real signatures and they’d be tossed. So now what do you suggest?  Oh, and what are YOU doing in your spare time besides posting responses to silly topics here on alt.adoption, being that you have no children and do not seem to have anything better to do. I have no spare time.  I’m working about 18 hours a day and take breaks. Glad you have the money to fly around the country for Bastard events. Most of us don’t. Jealous?

She isn`t stating that, she is simply stating a fact being that a huge majority of the citizens in this country work for beans or are unemployed due to the fact that all of our industry has moved abroad . Marley I would say that most of your posts and Bastard’s Nation are not even mature or adult-orientated.

We do have to admit that a lot that you see about BN is rather, hummmmmm, " entertaining " to say the least . Must be why we actually get records open.

Not always . They need to take the time to consider the mentality of the states they are working in and take a different approach as needed because I can think of a few states where they need to put a little more emotion into it when trying for open records . They always state there is no room for emotion in this but they are sadly mistaken in many cases as we have seen in the past . – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Marley

Response:

Records open for WHO?  Not for the birthparents who are searching.  Only adoptees in a few states can get their OBC’s.  Bastard Nation has done nothing for the birthparents out there who are searching and having to pay huge fees to "find."

Birth parent legal arguments are totally different and need to be addressed as such. In the US they can’t be conflated.  IT is political suicide  Ask those who have tried it.  Birth parents should develop their own strategies and organizations.  CUB has been around for 30 years.  I have a great deal of respect for CUB, but can you name one single state in which the have opened records for bparents?  Look to your own constituency before you complain about others. Marley, I hear you live either close to or in Columbus, OH.  Just because you’re all about politics for open records, not all of us are because we simply don’t have the time.

If you simply do searches and do not engage in political activites then you are helping to perpetute the sealed records, secret adoption system.  How can doing searches for individuals (by whatever means) further along identity rights? It simply carries on the status quo of secret government dossiers.  No doubt you don’t care for unions either.   This is about class struggle, not favours.  Some of us are here to help others if we can at no cost.  Why don’t you then, in your spare time instead of posting on alt.adoption all day, volunteer to do some lookups at Vital Stats?

I do.  I’m there twice a month.  Just ask Sue at the front desk.   Lots of adoptees need them for years that are incomplete for Ohio.  Many live in different states and cannot afford to fly in to do the lookups themselves.

I’ve done more lookups than you can imagine. I’m a trained historian, and was using public records before some of you around here were born.  I’m a professional oppositional researcher. Some people cannot wait for Bastard Nation to "open records" (and not do a damn thing for birthparents).  They want to find NOW.  Some people are sick and have a desperate need for medical history.  Why don’t you use some of your time, instead of posting non-sensical responses to subjects like "Dr. Phil",  "Miss Manners", Yardbitch, etc..,  and get off your political ass and do something to help triad members in your state that might not be around in the next 50-100 years when/if their states open records.

That must be why I spent the last 2 weeks writing a report to the State Department on it’s attempts via the Hague privatize the adoption records of international adoptees.  That must be why I’ve spent the last 4 years of my life dedicted go baby dumps.   That must be why I waste my time in scholarly writing on adoptionand writing op-ed pieces and letters to the editor and talking to legislators and reporters and TV stations.  Better yet, why not become a "Yahoo Group Recruiter" like Bernice.  Only difference being that you will tell people that YOUR group is the #1 group to join (don’t forget to add the $100 joiners  fee or the discount ‘pay by the

year’ What are you talking about?  What’s a Yahoo recruiter?.  Membership is $35/year and we have hardship memberships for Poor Bastards. fee) and of course, they MUST pay for all their plane tickets and hotel rooms to fly around the country side when Bastard Nation has it’s get-togethers and brouhahas, such as "Bastards On the Bayou", "Bastards March in WA", etc…,  Not all of us are rich and can afford even a $100 fee, let alone these fun-filled rendevous around the good ole US of A.

Are you trying to tell me that the NAACP the Republican Party, AARP and the Knights of Columbus pay for their members to attend yearly conventions? Boy, if that’s the case I’m gonna join every orgaization I can. Yes Dear, we do write letters to our legislators, senators and other heads of state.  We do what we can in our spare time but you see, some of us have children, and husband’s and families.

Well, that’s your lifestyle choice.  Pretty boring, huh?  We’re not like you, a person who has a strong dislike for children ( I think you refer to them as Sprog’s Frog’s or something similar), no matter that you were one yourself once upon a time.

What’s that suppose to mean?  Lots of people are happily free.  Many of us are educated enough to know that Online Petitions do not go anywhere, that they are not taken seriously, yet somewhere, sometime back, you yourself were urging others to sign some stupid online petition.

I can only remember one (not a BN petition) ,and the purpose of it was to gather names and addresses. They are not taken seriously without a signature, name, address, and phone number, yet you, with all your education, probably didn’t realize that.

Of course, they’re not.  That’s why we don’t use them.  In the current state of affairs ou could bring in real petitions with 18,765,000 real signatures and they’d be tossed. So now what do you suggest?  Oh, and what are YOU doing in your spare time besides posting responses to silly topics here on alt.adoption, being that you have no children and do not seem to have anything better to do.

I have no spare time.  I’m working about 18 hours a day and take breaks. Glad you have the money to fly around the country for Bastard events. Most of us don’t.

Jealous? Marley – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I would say that most of your posts and Bastard’s Nation are not even mature or adult-orientated. Must be why we actually get records open. Marley

Response:

I seen the topics on here and a lot of them don’t even have nothing to do with adoption and you pick on a former member of my group named Jackie and that isn’t very nice.

Hurts my head. Worse than fingernails on a chalkboard. P2P

Response:

Records open for WHO?  Not for the birthparents who are searching.  Only adoptees in a few states can get their OBC’s.  Bastard Nation has done nothing for the birthparents out there who are searching and having to pay huge fees to "find." Marley, I hear you live either close to or in Columbus, OH.  Just because you’re all about politics for open records, not all of us are because we simply don’t have the time.  Some of us are here to help others if we can at no cost.  Why don’t you then, in your spare time instead of posting on alt.adoption all day, volunteer to do some lookups at Vital Stats?  Lots of adoptees need them for years that are incomplete for Ohio.  Many live in different states and cannot afford to fly in to do the lookups themselves. Some people cannot wait for Bastard Nation to "open records" (and not do a damn thing for birthparents).  They want to find NOW.  Some people are sick and have a desperate need for medical history.  Why don’t you use some of your time, instead of posting non-sensical responses to subjects like "Dr. Phil",  "Miss Manners", Yardbitch, etc..,  and get off your political ass and do something to help triad members in your state that might not be around in the next 50-100 years when/if their states open records.  Better yet, why not become a "Yahoo Group Recruiter" like Bernice.  Only difference being that you will tell people that YOUR group is the #1 group to join (don’t forget to add the $100 joiners  fee or the discount ‘pay by the year’ fee) and of course, they MUST pay for all their plane tickets and hotel rooms to fly around the country side when Bastard Nation has it’s get-togethers and brouhahas, such as "Bastards On the Bayou", "Bastards March in WA", etc…,  Not all of us are rich and can afford even a $100 fee, let alone these fun-filled rendevous around the good ole US of A. Yes Dear, we do write letters to our legislators, senators and other heads of state.  We do what we can in our spare time but you see, some of us have children, and husband’s and families.  We’re not like you, a person who has a strong dislike for children ( I think you refer to them as Sprog’s Frog’s or something similar), no matter that you were one yourself once upon a time.  Many of us are educated enough to know that Online Petitions do not go anywhere, that they are not taken seriously, yet somewhere, sometime back, you yourself were urging others to sign some stupid online petition. They are not taken seriously without a signature, name, address, and phone number, yet you, with all your education, probably didn’t realize that. So now what do you suggest?  Oh, and what are YOU doing in your spare time besides posting responses to silly topics here on alt.adoption, being that you have no children and do not seem to have anything better to do. Glad you have the money to fly around the country for Bastard events.  Most of us don’t. I would say that most of your posts and Bastard’s Nation are not even mature or adult-orientated.

Must be why we actually get records open. Marley – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text –

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Last I heard, this group was not exclusive to Bastard Nation members only. Why don’t you do something to help?  I suggest you join ALIA and educate Bernice and her group of unsuspecting triad members about Open Records and what they can do. Why would I want to join a search group–especially a group of amateurs? If you haven’t guessed it yet, alt.adoption  is more politically and adult oriented and we don’t suffer fools.  We could care less about a high school tiff.   Unfortunately, the search movement has castrated the the politics of identity rights in this country.  It’s taught people that all that is important is their own self-interest, not the class interest of adoptees. Sort of the Reganiazation of adoptee rights. When adoptees/brirthparents are being manipulated and lied to I am sorry but it is an adoption issue . You claim that you fight for the open records movement and thr rights of the triad yet you sit and watch this outrageous group tear down what we have all worked for . And what have you worked for? What does Bernice and her Top Mods and all their ilk across the country  have to do with open records?  Are they oppositional researchers on the side trying to bring down NCFA.    The only relationship is that the sealed records system creates these organizations and mentality.  If records were open, these people would have to go back to ceramics class or having babies or something.   There is absolutely nothing wrong with searching.  When I started this in 1980 there was a political consciousness regarding search–search was a personal part of a political movement of identity rights.  You don’t see much of that any more.

I agree on that, it has changed tremendously over the past several years . As for Bernice helping to change laws we all know that will NEVER happen obviously . Many of my political friends have voted to open records through education of the issues and others vow support in various states when it occurs in their state .  Yes, I am a searcher and I believe in open records as do most of my friends who are searchers as well . You once stated that you were from Ohio . Do you help search there or are you basically an activist ? As people have previously stated the war against ALIA may appear childish and a waste to some but many have joined to help rid the triad of this group . If you noticed the once  4,000 a month posts have gone to less than four hundred a month . I` d say that it has helped tremendously . There are other groups who are not nearly as bad however still less than good . They too fall by the wayside as you have no doubt seen over the years . We all feel that we stand for what we believe  . Just because we all do not agree it does not mean that we all do not feel that we are right in what we believe or support . As Always, MsMaggie – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – I have been involved in adoption issues for years . I have solved more searches than I care to remember and for free I might add. And what does that have to do with open records?  What are your political credentials?  What has the search movement done in the last hmm, say 15 years to open records.  Some searchers have publicly declared themselves against open records. Don`t think that the self proclaimed "  royalty " of alt who can post nothing but absolute off the wall bull shit half the time will EVER chase me from the board as they brag they can accomplish . I do NOT back down, not from anyone so get used to it . Defend the people who need to be defended from this insane group and leave the childish remarks for your friends in private . Delete our posts if you wish, just like I do half the dribble about others which has no damn business on any board anywhere . As Always, MsMaggie talk about insane group…. Marley And just for the record, the little comment that was made about my Rest assured if I were a maggotI would not partake of the flesh of any of this bunch after they rot , I`d have better taste. In the meantime, this IS an adoption-related issue.  Trying to take down a group that is giving adoptees and birthparents & siblings wrong info and steering them in the wrong direction is the whole idea here, or perhaps education from you or some other BN member. Yes, it is an adoption issue, but the way you handle it is immature and juvenile?  Have any of you filed civil complaints, for instance?   Have you contacted to local press to expose rip-offs  Coming over to alt.adoption to whine and moan doesn’t mean jack. This is a consumer issue and should be handled like one.  The only thing you do with your continual search wars is make fools of yourself in front of the serious deform movement, who simply laugh at you.  Instead of telling us to take this issue off this board, why don’t you butt in (since you like to do that anyway) and help do something about this problem?  This board has every right to be vocal about internet groups that give searching triad members bad or wrong advice.  Of course, you probably don’t agree, Manley? Then do it in a professional manner, not like a bunch of little Heathers. Or better yet, why don’t you people who complain so much get involved politically.  What are you doing in your own states to forward unhindered access to records. Have any of you testified against baby dump laws, gone on the radio or TV against the Morriseys.  Have you sent your comments on the Hague to the State Department?  Written op-eds and letters, joined BN, the AAC, the GRs? Grow a political consciousness for pete’s sake.  Should we take a vote here on aa about who cares about your search wars? Marley Boring.  You define the term boring.  If you and your womb crawlers spent half the time spent here on opening records in your various states and addressing the real issues of adoption, you might actually have something to show for at the end of the day.  Instead, you show yourself for what your are, whiney girrly girls.  It’s people like you who are the true  enemy of adopted persons and their rights.  You make ALL crowd look like genuises. Now bug off of alt.adoption. Marley

Response:

Maryley, I will agree your comments make a lot of sense but how better to warn other adoptees about this group then by speaking about it on here?  I’m sure you will agree that ALIA is a group that nobody should join, especially someone new to search or new to the internet.  This is NOT about searcher wars at all.

Oh bullshit.  Same war as the last one, different players.  And none of you can spell for shit. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!" —–Unknown

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Last I heard, this group was not exclusive to Bastard Nation members only. Why don’t you do something to help?  I suggest you join ALIA and educate Bernice and her group of unsuspecting triad members about Open Records and what they can do. Why would I want to join a search group–especially a group of amateurs? If you haven’t guessed it yet, alt.adoption  is more politically and adult oriented and we don’t suffer fools.  We could care less about a high school tiff.   Unfortunately, the search movement has castrated the the politics of identity rights in this country.  It’s taught people that all that is important is their own self-interest, not the class interest of adoptees. Sort of the Reganiazation of adoptee rights. When adoptees/brirthparents are being manipulated and lied to I am sorry but it is an adoption issue . You claim that you fight for the open records movement and thr rights of the triad yet you sit and watch this outrageous group tear down what we have all worked for .

And what have you worked for? What does Bernice and her Top Mods and all their ilk across the country  have to do with open records?  Are they oppositional researchers on the side trying to bring down NCFA.    The only relationship is that the sealed records system creates these organizations and mentality.  If records were open, these people would have to go back to ceramics class or having babies or something.   There is absolutely nothing wrong with searching.  When I started this in 1980 there was a political consciousness regarding search–search was a personal part of a political movement of identity rights.  You don’t see much of that any more. I have been involved in adoption issues for years . I have solved more searches than I care to remember and for free I might add.

And what does that have to do with open records?  What are your political credentials?  What has the search movement done in the last hmm, say 15 years to open records.  Some searchers have publicly declared themselves against open records. Don`t think that the self proclaimed "  royalty " of alt who can post nothing but absolute off the wall bull shit half the time will EVER chase me from the board as they brag they can accomplish . I do NOT back down, not from anyone so get used to it . Defend the people who need to be defended from this insane group and leave the childish remarks for your friends in private . Delete our posts if you wish, just like I do half the dribble about others which has no damn business on any board anywhere . As Always, MsMaggie

talk about insane group…. Marley – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – And just for the record, the little comment that was made about my Rest assured if I were a maggotI would not partake of the flesh of any of this bunch after they rot , I`d have better taste. In the meantime, this IS an adoption-related issue.  Trying to take down a group that is giving adoptees and birthparents & siblings wrong info and steering them in the wrong direction is the whole idea here, or perhaps education from you or some other BN member. Yes, it is an adoption issue, but the way you handle it is immature and juvenile?  Have any of you filed civil complaints, for instance?   Have you contacted to local press to expose rip-offs  Coming over to alt.adoption to whine and moan doesn’t mean jack. This is a consumer issue and should be handled like one.  The only thing you do with your continual search wars is make fools of yourself in front of the serious deform movement, who simply laugh at you.  Instead of telling us to take this issue off this board, why don’t you butt in (since you like to do that anyway) and help do something about this problem?  This board has every right to be vocal about internet groups that give searching triad members bad or wrong advice.  Of course, you probably don’t agree, Manley? Then do it in a professional manner, not like a bunch of little Heathers. Or better yet, why don’t you people who complain so much get involved politically.  What are you doing in your own states to forward unhindered access to records. Have any of you testified against baby dump laws, gone on the radio or TV against the Morriseys.  Have you sent your comments on the Hague to the State Department?  Written op-eds and letters, joined BN, the AAC, the GRs? Grow a political consciousness for pete’s sake.  Should we take a vote here on aa about who cares about your search wars? Marley Boring.  You define the term boring.  If you and your womb crawlers spent half the time spent here on opening records in your various states and addressing the real issues of adoption, you might actually have something to show for at the end of the day.  Instead, you show yourself for what your are, whiney girrly girls.  It’s people like you who are the true  enemy of adopted persons and their rights.  You make ALL crowd look like genuises. Now bug off of alt.adoption. Marley

Response:

Dear Marley, I am thankful you tried to stick up for me but this is not your group.

I attemptedto stick up for you?  It is not named alt.manly.marley or alt.adoption.butch-fem and it is not just for the members of Bastard’s Nation so why do you say adoptees and birthparnents cannot post on this group?

Nobody said that?  Where did anybod say that?  We find the whole cross-posting to alt.adoption tiresome.  You can  post to your heart’s content and everybody is laughing at you.  I seen the topics on here and a lot of them don’t even have nothing to do with adoption and you pick on a former member of my group named Jackie and that isn’t very nice.

I don’t pick on Jackie. In fact, Jackie and I get along well.  I would say that most of your posts and Bastard’s Nation are not even mature or adult-orientated.

Must be why we actually get records open. Marley – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hugs, Bernice http://groups.yahoo.com/groups/AngelsLostInAdoption Last I heard, this group was not exclusive to Bastard Nation members only. Why don’t you do something to help?  I suggest you join ALIA and educate Bernice and her group of unsuspecting triad members about Open Records and what they can do. Why would I want to join a search group–especially a group of amateurs? If you haven’t guessed it yet, alt.adoption  is more politically and adult oriented and we don’t suffer fools.  We could care less about a high school tiff.   Unfortunately, the search movement has castrated the the politics of identity rights in this country.  It’s taught people that all that is important is their own self-interest, not the class interest of adoptees. Sort of the Reganiazation of adoptee rights. When adoptees/brirthparents are being manipulated and lied to I am sorry but it is an adoption issue . You claim that you fight for the open records movement and thr rights of the triad yet you sit and watch this outrageous group tear down what we have all worked for . And what have you worked for? What does Bernice and her Top Mods and all their ilk across the country  have to do with open records?  Are they oppositional researchers on the side trying to bring down NCFA.    The only relationship is that the sealed records system creates these organizations and mentality.  If records were open, these people would have to go back to ceramics class or having babies or something.   There is absolutely nothing wrong with searching.  When I started this in 1980 there was a political consciousness regarding search–search was a personal part of a political movement of identity rights.  You don’t see much of that any more. I have been involved in adoption issues for years . I have solved more searches than I care to remember and for free I might add. And what does that have to do with open records?  What are your political credentials?  What has the search movement done in the last hmm, say 15 years to open records.  Some searchers have publicly declared themselves against open records. Don`t think that the self proclaimed "  royalty " of alt who can post nothing but absolute off the wall bull shit half the time will EVER chase me from the board as they brag they can accomplish . I do NOT back down, not from anyone so get used to it . Defend the people who need to be defended from this insane group and leave the childish remarks for your friends in private . Delete our posts if you wish, just like I do half the dribble about others which has no damn business on any board anywhere . As Always, MsMaggie talk about insane group…. Marley And just for the record, the little comment that was made about my Rest assured if I were a maggotI would not partake of the flesh of any of this bunch after they rot , I`d have better taste. In the meantime, this IS an adoption-related issue.  Trying to take down a group that is giving adoptees and birthparents & siblings wrong info and steering them in the wrong direction is the whole idea here, or perhaps education from you or some other BN member. Yes, it is an adoption issue, but the way you handle it is immature and juvenile?  Have any of you filed civil complaints, for instance? Have you contacted to local press to expose rip-offs  Coming over to alt.adoption to whine and moan doesn’t mean jack. This is a consumer issue and should be handled like one.  The only thing you do with your continual search wars is make fools of yourself in front of the serious deform movement, who simply laugh at you.  Instead of telling us to take this issue off this board, why don’t you butt in (since you like to do that anyway) and help do something about this problem?  This board has every right to be vocal about internet groups that give searching triad members bad or wrong advice.  Of course, you probably don’t agree, Manley? Then do it in a professional manner, not like a bunch of little Heathers. Or better yet, why don’t you people who complain so much get involved politically.  What are you doing in your own states to forward unhindered access to records. Have any of you testified against baby dump laws, gone on the radio or TV against the Morriseys.  Have you sent your comments on the Hague to the State Department?  Written op-eds and letters, joined BN, the AAC, the GRs? Grow a political consciousness for pete’s sake.  Should we take a vote here on aa about who cares about your search wars? Marley Boring.  You define the term boring.  If you and your womb crawlers spent half the time spent here on opening records in your various states and addressing the real issues of adoption, you might actually have something to show for at the end of the day.  Instead, you show yourself for what your are, whiney girrly girls.  It’s people like you who are the true enemy of adopted persons and their rights.  You make ALL crowd look like genuises. Now bug off of alt.adoption. Marley

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Dear Marley, I am thankful you tried to stick up for me but this is not your group. It is not named alt.manly.marley or alt.adoption.butch-fem and it is not just for the members of Bastard’s Nation so why do you say adoptees and birthparnents cannot post on this group? I seen the topics on here and a lot of them don’t even have nothing to do with adoption and you pick on a former member of my group named Jackie and that isn’t very nice. I would say that most of your posts and Bastard’s Nation are not even mature or adult-orientated. Hugs,

And yours are hardly legible.  <insert dueling banjos theme A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!" —–Unknown

Response:

Maryley, I will agree your comments make a lot of sense but how better to warn other adoptees about this group then by speaking about it on here?  I’m sure you will agree that ALIA is a group that nobody should join, especially someone new to search or new to the internet.  This is NOT about searcher wars at all.  This is about a group on Yahoo, owned by a woman named Bernice Carpenter who tells others to unsub from other groups and stick with hers, a group that does minor searches and has search "angles" that make contact calls.  They even go behind an adoptee’s or birthmother’s back and surprise them by making these calls.   How better then to inform others or put the word out than to put it on a group that EVERYBODY can read, unmoderated?  Yahoo has been contacted several times about this group and from what I gather, the group is under investigation for the last minor search it did. Bernice did delete all her archives but many ex-members have the original posts.  Marley, a family with four adopted children, three of them minors was literally "stalked" by one of the ALIA members who had been urged by ALIA mods to go to the home of this adopted family and make the contact.  How would one exactly going about handling such a group in a professional manner such as you suggest?  Putting the word out to newcomers is the best way I can think of.  We’d get laughed off the face of the earth if we made a civil complaint about a 1400 member Yahoo Group.  We have other ideas.  An informative homepage is in the works.  You belong to a group YOU believe strongly in.  IMHO, shutting down cult-like groups that HURT, not HELP triad members should be a concern for all. Lady Di – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Last I heard, this group was not exclusive to Bastard Nation members only. Why don’t you do something to help?  I suggest you join ALIA and educate Bernice and her group of unsuspecting triad members about Open Records and what they can do. Why would I want to join a search group–especially a group of amateurs?  If you haven’t guessed it yet, alt.adoption  is more politically and adult oriented and we don’t suffer fools.  We could care less about a high school tiff.   Unfortunately, the search movement has castrated the the politics of identity rights in this country.  It’s taught people that all that is important is their own self-interest, not the class interest of adoptees. Sort of the Reganiazation of adoptee rights. In the meantime, this IS an adoption-related issue.  Trying to take down a group that is giving adoptees and birthparents & siblings wrong info and steering them in the wrong direction is the whole idea here, or perhaps education from you or some other BN member. Yes, it is an adoption issue, but the way you handle it is immature and juvenile?  Have any of you filed civil complaints, for instance?   Have you contacted to local press to expose rip-offs  Coming over to alt.adoption to whine and moan doesn’t mean jack. This is a consumer issue and should be handled like one.  The only thing you do with your continual search wars is make fools of yourself in front of the serious deform movement, who simply laugh at you.  Instead of telling us to take this issue off this board, why don’t you butt in (since you like to do that anyway) and help do something about this problem?  This board has every right to be vocal about internet groups that give searching triad members bad or wrong advice.  Of course, you probably don’t agree, Manley? Then do it in a professional manner, not like a bunch of little Heathers. Or better yet, why don’t you people who complain so much get involved politically.  What are you doing in your own states to forward unhindered access to records. Have any of you testified against baby dump laws, gone on the radio or TV against the Morriseys.  Have you sent your comments on the Hague to the State Department?  Written op-eds and letters, joined BN, the AAC, the GRs? Grow a political consciousness for pete’s sake.  Should we take a vote here on aa about who cares about your search wars? Marley Boring.  You define the term boring.  If you and your womb crawlers spent half the time spent here on opening records in your various states and addressing the real issues of adoption, you might actually have something to show for at the end of the day.  Instead, you show yourself for what your are, whiney girrly girls.  It’s people like you who are the true  enemy of adopted persons and their rights.  You make ALL crowd look like genuises. Now bug off of alt.adoption. Marley

Response:

Dear Marley, I am thankful you tried to stick up for me but this is not your group. It is not named alt.manly.marley or alt.adoption.butch-fem and it is not just for the members of Bastard’s Nation so why do you say adoptees and birthparnents cannot post on this group? I seen the topics on here and a lot of them don’t even have nothing to do with adoption and you pick on a former member of my group named Jackie and that isn’t very nice. I would say that most of your posts and Bastard’s Nation are not even mature or adult-orientated. Hugs, Bernice http://groups.yahoo.com/groups/AngelsLostInAdoption – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Last I heard, this group was not exclusive to Bastard Nation members only. Why don’t you do something to help?  I suggest you join ALIA and educate Bernice and her group of unsuspecting triad members about Open Records and what they can do. Why would I want to join a search group–especially a group of amateurs? If you haven’t guessed it yet, alt.adoption  is more politically and adult oriented and we don’t suffer fools.  We could care less about a high school tiff.   Unfortunately, the search movement has castrated the the politics of identity rights in this country.  It’s taught people that all that is important is their own self-interest, not the class interest of adoptees. Sort of the Reganiazation of adoptee rights. When adoptees/brirthparents are being manipulated and lied to I am sorry but it is an adoption issue . You claim that you fight for the open records movement and thr rights of the triad yet you sit and watch this outrageous group tear down what we have all worked for . And what have you worked for? What does Bernice and her Top Mods and all their ilk across the country  have to do with open records?  Are they oppositional researchers on the side trying to bring down NCFA.    The only relationship is that the sealed records system creates these organizations and mentality.  If records were open, these people would have to go back to ceramics class or having babies or something.   There is absolutely nothing wrong with searching.  When I started this in 1980 there was a political consciousness regarding search–search was a personal part of a political movement of identity rights.  You don’t see much of that any more. I have been involved in adoption issues for years . I have solved more searches than I care to remember and for free I might add. And what does that have to do with open records?  What are your political credentials?  What has the search movement done in the last hmm, say 15 years to open records.  Some searchers have publicly declared themselves against open records. Don`t think that the self proclaimed "  royalty " of alt who can post nothing but absolute off the wall bull shit half the time will EVER chase me from the board as they brag they can accomplish . I do NOT back down, not from anyone so get used to it . Defend the people who need to be defended from this insane group and leave the childish remarks for your friends in private . Delete our posts if you wish, just like I do half the dribble about others which has no damn business on any board anywhere . As Always, MsMaggie talk about insane group…. Marley And just for the record, the little comment that was made about my Rest assured if I were a maggotI would not partake of the flesh of any of this bunch after they rot , I`d have better taste. In the meantime, this IS an adoption-related issue.  Trying to take down a group that is giving adoptees and birthparents & siblings wrong info and steering them in the wrong direction is the whole idea here, or perhaps education from you or some other BN member. Yes, it is an adoption issue, but the way you handle it is immature and juvenile?  Have any of you filed civil complaints, for instance?   Have you contacted to local press to expose rip-offs  Coming over to alt.adoption to whine and moan doesn’t mean jack. This is a consumer issue and should be handled like one.  The only thing you do with your continual search wars is make fools of yourself in front of the serious deform movement, who simply laugh at you.  Instead of telling us to take this issue off this board, why don’t you butt in (since you like to do that anyway) and help do something about this problem?  This board has every right to be vocal about internet groups that give searching triad members bad or wrong advice.  Of course, you probably don’t agree, Manley? Then do it in a professional manner, not like a bunch of little Heathers. Or better yet, why don’t you people who complain so much get involved politically.  What are you doing in your own states to forward unhindered access to records. Have any of you testified against baby dump laws, gone on the radio or TV against the Morriseys.  Have you sent your comments on the Hague to the State Department?  Written op-eds and letters, joined BN, the AAC, the GRs? Grow a political consciousness for pete’s sake.  Should we take a vote here on aa about who cares about your search wars? Marley Boring.  You define the term boring.  If you and your womb crawlers spent half the time spent here on opening records in your various states and addressing the real issues of adoption, you might actually have something to show for at the end of the day.  Instead, you show yourself for what your are, whiney girrly girls.  It’s people like you who are the true  enemy of adopted persons and their rights.  You make ALL crowd look like genuises. Now bug off of alt.adoption. Marley

Response:

Last I heard, this group was not exclusive to Bastard Nation members only.

Who said BN members were the only ones who find your idiotic crossposting rants offensive? Your little rant isn’t new.  About every one or two years, your little "searcher wars" gets crossposted and vomited all over alt.adoption.  Only because you’ve done boring yourselves and think that you might find "fresh meat" over here.  Nobody’s biting toots.  Get lost. Get a clue.  Most of the posters here aren’t searching.  And thanks to your posts, those who are will probably run away from any forum YOU post in. For God’s sakes….all your posts make those Deliverance guys look like fucking Harvard graduates.  You scare adoptees away.  Who wants to find you guys at the end of the line…like a family tree that doesn’t fork?   Take your tantrums back to your own group.   As bad as Bernice is…at least she isn’t insulting us with her presence anymore. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!" —–Unknown

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Last I heard, this group was not exclusive to Bastard Nation members only. Why don’t you do something to help?  I suggest you join ALIA and educate Bernice and her group of unsuspecting triad members about Open Records and what they can do. Why would I want to join a search group–especially a group of amateurs?  If you haven’t guessed it yet, alt.adoption  is more politically and adult oriented and we don’t suffer fools.  We could care less about a high school tiff.   Unfortunately, the search movement has castrated the the politics of identity rights in this country.  It’s taught people that all that is important is their own self-interest, not the class interest of adoptees. Sort of the Reganiazation of adoptee rights.

When adoptees/brirthparents are being manipulated and lied to I am sorry but it is an adoption issue . You claim that you fight for the open records movement and thr rights of the triad yet you sit and watch this outrageous group tear down what we have all worked for . I have been involved in adoption issues for years . I have solved more searches than I care to remember and for free I might add. Don`t think that the self proclaimed "  royalty " of alt who can post nothing but absolute off the wall bull shit half the time will EVER chase me from the board as they brag they can accomplish . I do NOT back down, not from anyone so get used to it . Defend the people who need to be defended from this insane group and leave the childish remarks for your friends in private . Delete our posts if you wish, just like I do half the dribble about others which has no damn business on any board anywhere . As Always, MsMaggie And just for the record, the little comment that was made about my Rest assured if I were a maggotI would not partake of the flesh of any of this bunch after they rot , I`d have better taste. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – In the meantime, this IS an adoption-related issue.  Trying to take down a group that is giving adoptees and birthparents & siblings wrong info and steering them in the wrong direction is the whole idea here, or perhaps education from you or some other BN member. Yes, it is an adoption issue, but the way you handle it is immature and juvenile?  Have any of you filed civil complaints, for instance?   Have you contacted to local press to expose rip-offs  Coming over to alt.adoption to whine and moan doesn’t mean jack. This is a consumer issue and should be handled like one.  The only thing you do with your continual search wars is make fools of yourself in front of the serious deform movement, who simply laugh at you.  Instead of telling us to take this issue off this board, why don’t you butt in (since you like to do that anyway) and help do something about this problem?  This board has every right to be vocal about internet groups that give searching triad members bad or wrong advice.  Of course, you probably don’t agree, Manley? Then do it in a professional manner, not like a bunch of little Heathers. Or better yet, why don’t you people who complain so much get involved politically.  What are you doing in your own states to forward unhindered access to records. Have any of you testified against baby dump laws, gone on the radio or TV against the Morriseys.  Have you sent your comments on the Hague to the State Department?  Written op-eds and letters, joined BN, the AAC, the GRs? Grow a political consciousness for pete’s sake.  Should we take a vote here on aa about who cares about your search wars? Marley Boring.  You define the term boring.  If you and your womb crawlers spent half the time spent here on opening records in your various states and addressing the real issues of adoption, you might actually have something to show for at the end of the day.  Instead, you show yourself for what your are, whiney girrly girls.  It’s people like you who are the true  enemy of adopted persons and their rights.  You make ALL crowd look like genuises. Now bug off of alt.adoption. Marley

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Why would I want to join a search group–especially a group of amateurs? If you haven’t guessed it yet, alt.adoption  is more politically and adult oriented and we don’t suffer fools.  We could care less about a high school tiff.   Unfortunately, the search movement has castrated the the politics of identity rights in this country.  It’s taught people that all that is important is their own self-interest, not the class interest of adoptees. Sort of the Reganiazation of adoptee rights. When adoptees/brirthparents are being manipulated and lied to I am sorry but it is an adoption issue. You claim that you fight for the open records movement and thr rights of the triad yet you sit and watch this outrageous group tear down what we have all worked for.

Come again?  How do the dubious acts of your target d’jour affect the move to open birth records.  They’re nobodies. I have been involved in adoption issues for years.

Such as?  I have solved more searches than I care to remember and for free I might add.

Well, that’s awfully nice of you, but again how does your involvement in these searches play into the aforementioned issue? Don`t think that the self proclaimed "  royalty " of alt who can post nothing but absolute off the wall bull shit half the time will EVER chase me from the board as they brag they can accomplish .

Nobody’s royalty here.  I don’t recall anybody bragging that they’d "chase [you] from the board".  The general consensus seems to be that nobody cares about your tiff with Bernice (whoever the fuck that is) and that if you’re ignored long enough you’ll simply disappear.  I suppose that’s advice worth taking. The salient point was made a few times that, in a year or so, you’ll come back with your panties in a bunch about somebody else.  You really should look beyond ALIA and whatever hair they laid across your ass and realize that a good portion of on-line search community is populated by amateurs, gossips and wannabes.  Marley suggested that you grow a political consciousness.  I concur.  You look at individuals as opposed to a class and how a few have been jacked around by a group of dingbats. I’ll ask again, since your buddy Lady Di has apparently carried out her threat of killfiling me, why do you suppose these groups exist at all? Furthermore, if you are successful in your fool’s errand of bringing ALIA down, do you think it will have any real, across the board impact?  How many groups out there are pulling the same kind of crap?  Do you feel it would be best to eliminate, or at least radically reduce, the neccessity for amateur search/gossip groups? I do NOT back down, not from anyone so get used to it . Defend the people who need to be defended from this insane group and leave the childish remarks for your friends in private .

Childish?  These are real questions.  These are real issues. I’ll agree that your beef ~is~ an adoption issue inasmuch as it’s symptomatic of on-line search groups and a malignant outgrowth of the sealed records system.  Other than that, it’s a high school catfight and becoming more tedious by the day. Delete our posts if you wish, just like I do half the dribble about others which has no damn business on any board anywhere .

But that’s exactly what you and your buddies are doing.  Posting shit about somebody else.  Do you see the irony? Jack

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Last I heard, this group was not exclusive to Bastard Nation members only. Why don’t you do something to help?  I suggest you join ALIA and educate Bernice and her group of unsuspecting triad members about Open Records and what they can do. Why would I want to join a search group–especially a group of amateurs?  If you haven’t guessed it yet, alt.adoption  is more politically and adult oriented and we don’t suffer fools.  We could care less about a high school tiff.   Unfortunately, the search movement has castrated the the politics of identity rights in this country.  It’s taught people that all that is important is their own self-interest, not the class interest of adoptees. Sort of the Reganiazation of adoptee rights. When adoptees/brirthparents are being manipulated and lied to I am sorry but it is an adoption issue.

What percentage of the adoption community do you really think gives tuppeny fuck about this bunch of morons? Anyone brain-dead enough to get involved with any of them, is probably going to get them self in to trouble somewhere down the line with or without the help of Bernice and co. You claim that you fight for the open records movement and thr rights of the triad yet you sit and watch this outrageous group tear down what we have all worked for.

What on this earth makes you think that anyone with one iota of common sense would ever give Bernice and her cronies a second thought, when it come to search and reunion? All you are doing is drawing prolonged attention to them and making their efforts all the more visible to those who would use them as a good argument against open records. I have been involved in adoption issues for years . I have solved more searches than I care to remember and for free I might add. Don`t think that the self proclaimed "  royalty " of alt who can post nothing but absolute off the wall bull shit half the time will EVER chase me from the board as they brag they can accomplish.

No one here on alt.adoption is advertising themselves as searchers, it is a broad and often robust international discussion group for wider issues including the political aspects of adoption and the relative merits of aparent and bparent cuisine amongst other issues, not a search group and not a support group as such. I do NOT back down, not from anyone so get used to it. Defend the people who need to be defended from this insane group and leave the childish remarks for your friends in private . Delete our posts if you wish, just like I do half the dribble about others which has no damn business on any board anywhere.

Fine, then continue to bore the pants of those on alt.adoption.searching with it.  Spare those of us on alt.adoption who never have had and never will have any interest in using a bunch of idiots that can’t even spell its own name correctly, to do any kind of search. We’re all well aware that most of them couldn’t even find their own arse when it comes time to wipe. Why do you think that we have the faintest interest in all this shite? Robin

Response:

Boring.  You define the term boring.  If you and your womb crawlers spent half the time spent here on opening records in your various states and addressing the real issues of adoption, you might actually have something to show for at the end of the day.  Instead, you show yourself for what your are, whiney girrly girls.  It’s people like you who are the true  enemy of adopted persons and their rights.  You make ALL crowd look like genuises. Now bug off of alt.adoption. Marley

Indeed. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail . . . but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn . . . that was fun!" —–Unknown

Response:

Last I heard, this group was not exclusive to Bastard Nation members only. Why don’t you do something to help?  I suggest you join ALIA and educate Bernice and her group of unsuspecting triad members about Open Records and what they can do. In the meantime, this IS an adoption-related issue.  Trying to take down a group that is giving adoptees and birthparents & siblings wrong info and steering them in the wrong direction is the whole idea here, or perhaps education from you or some other BN member.  Instead of telling us to take this issue off this board, why don’t you butt in (since you like to do that anyway) and help do something about this problem?  This board has every right to be vocal about internet groups that give searching triad members bad or wrong advice.  Of course, you probably don’t agree, Manley? Boring.  You define the term boring.  If you and your womb

crawlers spent half the time spent here on opening records in your various states and addressing the real issues of adoption, you might actually have something to show for at the end of the day.  Instead, you show yourself for what your are, whiney girrly girls.  It’s people like you who are the true  enemy of adopted persons and their rights.  You make ALL crowd look like genuises. Now bug off of alt.adoption. Marley

Response:

Last I heard, this group was not exclusive to Bastard Nation members only. Why don’t you do something to help?  I suggest you join ALIA and educate Bernice and her group of unsuspecting triad members about Open Records and what they can do.

Why would I want to join a search group–especially a group of amateurs?  If you haven’t guessed it yet, alt.adoption  is more politically and adult oriented and we don’t suffer fools.  We could care less about a high school tiff.   Unfortunately, the search movement has castrated the the politics of identity rights in this country.  It’s taught people that all that is important is their own self-interest, not the class interest of adoptees. Sort of the Reganiazation of adoptee rights. In the meantime, this IS an adoption-related issue.  Trying to take down a group that is giving adoptees and birthparents & siblings wrong info and steering them in the wrong direction is the whole idea here, or perhaps education from you or some other BN member.

Yes, it is an adoption issue, but the way you handle it is immature and juvenile?  Have any of you filed civil complaints, for instance?   Have you contacted to local press to expose rip-offs  Coming over to alt.adoption to whine and moan doesn’t mean jack. This is a consumer issue and should be handled like one.  The only thing you do with your continual search wars is make fools of yourself in front of the serious deform movement, who simply laugh at you.   Instead of telling us to take this issue off this board, why don’t you butt in (since you like to do that anyway) and help do something about this problem?  This board has every right to be vocal about internet groups that give searching triad members bad or wrong advice.  Of course, you probably don’t agree, Manley?

Then do it in a professional manner, not like a bunch of little Heathers. Or better yet, why don’t you people who complain so much get involved politically.  What are you doing in your own states to forward unhindered access to records. Have any of you testified against baby dump laws, gone on the radio or TV against the Morriseys.  Have you sent your comments on the Hague to the State Department?  Written op-eds and letters, joined BN, the AAC, the GRs? Grow a political consciousness for pete’s sake.  Should we take a vote here on aa about who cares about your search wars? Marley – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Boring.  You define the term boring.  If you and your womb crawlers spent half the time spent here on opening records in your various states and addressing the real issues of adoption, you might actually have something to show for at the end of the day.  Instead, you show yourself for what your are, whiney girrly girls.  It’s people like you who are the true  enemy of adopted persons and their rights.  You make ALL crowd look like genuises. Now bug off of alt.adoption. Marley

Response:

Why else they be so boringly ensnaring us in their endless disputes? Actually I suppose it is Lady Di who is running the dispute. Is she actually Lady Di, or is she some american with a royalty fetish – if so get over it. Charles has moved on from his ex-wife to Camilla, and now the butler. You should too. Try a new alias. Doug Thomas

Response:

Doug, if Bernice and I are separated twins, then you and that Jack Bernhard must be circle jerk buddies cause you’re pretty damn boring yourself.  I’ll tell you like I told him:  Put it in a killfile or don’t read it if you don’t like it.   – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -Why else they be so boringly ensnaring us in their endless disputes? Actually I suppose it is Lady Di who is running the dispute. Is she actually Lady Di, or is she some american with a royalty fetish – if so get over it. Charles has moved on from his ex-wife to Camilla, and now the butler. You should too. Try a new alias. Doug Thomas

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Doug, if Bernice and I are separated twins, then you and that Jack Bernhard must be circle jerk buddies cause you’re pretty damn boring yourself.  I’ll tell you like I told him:  Put it in a killfile or don’t read it if you don’t like it. Why else they be so boringly ensnaring us in their endless disputes? Actually I suppose it is Lady Di who is running the dispute. Is she actually Lady Di, or is she some american with a royalty fetish – if so get over it. Charles has moved on from his ex-wife to Camilla, and now the butler. You should too. Try a new alias. Doug Thomas

Boring.  You define the term boring.  If you and your womb crawlers spent half the time spent here on opening records in your various states and addressing the real issues of adoption, you might actually have something to show for at the end of the day.  Instead, you show yourself for what your are, whiney girrly girls.  It’s people like you who are the true  enemy of adopted persons and their rights.  You make ALL crowd look like genuises. Now bug off of alt.adoption. Marley

Response: